Patrick O’Bstetrics Fan Account

i agree so much about making your blorbos pathetic but i do fear that many take this to mean 'make them more traditionally feminine/submissive' which genuinely hurts my soul. make your blorbos pathetic in interesting character-oriented ways. understand their neuroses and turn the dials up to eleven. juxtapose the parts of life they handle extremely well with the parts of their lives that make them eat shit. make them angry. make them cold. make them pave their own way to hell while building walls preventing them from seeing any other way. please i'm begging you no more pathetic as an euphemism for bottoming im gonna mclose it.

you want me so bad it makes you look Intelligent and good taste

i’m sorry i got carried away and humped your leg until i came while we were kissing

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

please be perverted about me in these trying times

the closer you get to 30 dating is just sitting down and asking each other “what happened to you as a kid and how are you dealing with it?”

you're telling me this hole is significant to the plot?

the dick sucking cuddler would like to rest its head on your tummy with no ulterior motive whatsoever

Real thing that changed how i write: I started asking "what does this character think is wrong with them" and separately "what is actually wrong with them." Those two things are almost never the same. She thinks she's too much. She's actually terrified of being too little. He thinks he's bad at commitment. He's actually just never met someone he trusted enough. The gap between their diagnosis of themselves and the real thing, that's your character arc right there. you don't have to explain it. just write both.

wanna hang out [remembers it's rude to put expectations on people] it's cool if not [remembers people like to know they're wanted] but I'd really like it if you did [remembers selfishness is bad] we can do whatever you want though [remembers that handing someone a blank canvas isn't as effective as providing a suggestion to bounce ideas off of] like sucking each others fingers for example

coming to your baby shower and you unwrap the gift and its a men's size large tshirt that reads GAY ACTING STRAIGHT MALE in impact font and I say sorry they were out of the ones that said world's best dad