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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

Andulka
Keni

ellievsbear
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

oozey mess
Misplaced Lens Cap
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

gracie abrams
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
cherry valley forever

Love Begins
Fai_Ryy
todays bird
Cosimo Galluzzi
macklin celebrini has autism

Kiana Khansmith
Cosmic Funnies

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@onehundredcrocus
PRACTICE URGE SURFING

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“villain attempts to go back in time to kill superman as a small child, gets shot in the face by ma kent, who buries him behind the barn with the others” would probably have niche appeal as a comic but i don’t care, i want it
The first time a man from the future showed up at Martha Kent’s house, Clark Kent was two years old.
According to his birth certificate, anyway. She just kind of accepted that the details were a little fudged. Relativity, and all.
Maybe the stranger would have succeeded in whatever it was he wanted to do, except that he really did just show up. Appeared, like a ghost made flesh, right in the backyard. Clark, thank goodness, was out in the fields with Jonathan. He couldn’t bear to be alone, that boy, and they could never bear to leave him.
Which left Martha free to shoot the ghostly intruder in the face.
Martha had not always considered herself a shoot first, ask questions later sort of a person. But that was before she found a baby in a spaceship where her corn was supposed to be.
They’d switch off, Jonathan and her, who got Clark and who got the shotgun. Martha got the shotgun more often than not. Guns made her husband uncomfortable. She was hardly a fan, but she’d always been a terrible pacifist. Too determined to defend herself.
The sight of all that blood and brain and bone was still nauseating. She compartmentalized, told herself it was no different from slaughtering a cow; didn’t think about riot gear or tear gas or the friends she’d lost or all the things she’d moved away from when her heart couldn’t take it any longer. This was different. This was her son.
She prodded the corpse with her foot. It remained a corpse. A real nasty looking corpse, all big and burly and holding a gun much too large. She didn’t like making assumptions based on appearances, but she didn’t imagine he’d been coming for anything nice. She bent down to search his pockets, found a metal wallet and flipped it open.
Born 2018.
Well, hell. Wasn’t that just a kick in the pants?
Probably she ought to have been a bit more unsettled than she was. But she’d been waiting two years for someone to show up on her doorstep, men in black or UFOs or something. Hell, she’d half expected her sweet little boy to hatch into something worse.
Just because she brought home space babies didn’t mean she was a damn fool.
Jonathan had rejoined her in long strides, was holding Clark in such a way that he couldn’t see the corpse on the ground. “Well, shit,” he said.
“Eyup,” Martha agreed.
“Don’t look government.”
“Nope.”
“We burying him?”
“I’ll bury him,” Martha said, standing up. “You get Clark inside and read him a book or something. I don’t want him seeing any of this, getting him messed up in the head.”
“You sure? Looks heavy.”
“That’s why we have a wheelbarrow. I’ll stick him out behind the barn, might as well keep all our secrets in one place.”
Martha had a long time to think as she dug a time traveler’s grave. There were a lot of reasons someone might travel back in time trying to kill her kid. The first was her instinct as a mother, which was: he was a fucking asshole. Who killed a kid? Fucking assholes, that was who.
Now, it was also possible that her sweet little boy grew up to be some kind of space Hitler. She didn’t think she’d raise that kind of a kid, but she didn’t suppose there was any parent who set out to raise a Hitler.
Still didn’t sit right with her. She didn’t much like the idea of killing baby Hitler, either.
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saw a post about this earlier but it made me think: tumblr really is the only social media site where I go on and have a good time and then carry on with my day. I know it's completely curated because there are some awful people here but that (the curation) in itself is a privilege of the site. Every other social media site is designed to make you angry for more engagement
Right now he needs kindness. I don’t always know if he deserves it, but right now he needs kindness.

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well shit I'm going to make this
(also, shoutout to the Auntie/Nonna method of measuring ingredients — "all the onions in your house, and maybe your neighbor's house too")
"This week I discovered the same pattern, executed by Google. Google Chrome is reaching into users' machines and writing a 4 GB on-device AI model file to disk without asking."
Google Chrome is downloading a 4 GB Gemini Nano model onto users' machines without consent, with no opt-in, no opt-out short of enterprise t
Google Chrome automatically installs local neural network components on user systems via default configurations. The browser downloads a 4GB
Procedures for disabling it
Guide to Figuring out the Age of an Undated World Map.
No but take the time to actually read it because I lost like 15 minutes.
I have a friend who is really good at this type of thing. He once found an old globe at a garage sale and he was able to pin the date of it’s making down to like a 6 month window, because it only would’ve been correct during a specific point in WWII.
I was mad impressed, because I have no mind for geography. I can barely remember my own state’s capitol.
THIS IS GOLD 😂😂😂
This is amazing. Take the time to actually read it.
Holy shit the super specific things towards the end
Oh wow!
I didn’t know anything about the giant lake in California being created by accident?!
I love how it differentiates the maps of Narnia based on which book you’re looking at
I almost scrolled past this
I need to check some of my old maps with this flowchart.
Do you love the Eras of the Earth?
Which One?
I absolutely fucking hate this. Gold star, no notes.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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If you had to sing a child to sleep RIGHT NOW what would you sing and it CANT BE a lullaby it has to be a regular song
Delighted to have found this alignment chart I made one year ago today. I stand by my choices.
nothing in the world is mundane someone spent years of their life studying and thinking about culverts and building upon the countless work of others and our historical collected knowledge of fluid dynamics and construction materials just so that your shit doesn't get flooded all the time and you dont even think about it! have you ever considered the culvert really? and its like. fucking everything is like this
Apparently, you can't post videos in a reblog so...
Skirt go spin! <3
Trans joy is the most beautiful thing in the world
🩷OP MADE HER DRESS SO YOU BETTER REBLOG!🩷

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl… what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀
If ANYTHING is a heritage post it’s this.
put in the tags:
your first concert
your last concert
your next concert
your favourite concert