Live Long and Fangirl

Coyotes trying their damndest to get domesticated

westley in the princess bride was so funny for being like ‘talk about this dead guy you loved lol’ and getting the tea about himself

oh he was ur true love? you thought he was hot n strong? rate him 1-10 and why

i hate how reward systems never work for me like i can’t just say “if i finish this assignment i can have a cookie” bc my brain is like “…..or u could just have one right now” and i can’t argue with that logic

Self-imposed deadlines don’t work either because I know the guy who set them and he’s full of shit

I had a dream about bakeoff except they were all cooking increasingly weird stuff until they got to the last guy and Paul asked ‘what are you serving’ and his response was just ‘these hands’ and then he knocked Paul Hollywood out on national television

I BURST OUT FUCKING LAUGHING OMG

[[*TNG theme song plays* *Patrick Stewart runs outside and shouts* YOU MOTHERFCKERS ARE GONNA KILL ALL MY LILIES *shoots guns twice* PEST CONTROL! *TNG theme song*]]

Me introducing myself

“I’m not legally allowed to talk about who I am”

How do you explain to someone that this is your sense of humor

I was wondering where this was going and lemme tell you I fell out of my chair