"came back wrong" but it's food that you heated up in the microwave

Since reading this post and following its advice, my microwaved good comes out so much better.

Since reading this post a d following its advice, my necromantic rituals have come out so much better.

Also low-heat ovens are great for reheating pizza, lasagna, etc. Oven heat stays for longer than microwave heat (I think bc the oven heats everything and microwaves superheat water, but I'm not an expert).

i saw a girl on tiktok who put her salt lamp in the dishwasher and didn’t realize it would dissolve, and it’s been on my mind for like 3 days

in the club fully sober politely informing my friends that I don't like loud sounds and will be leaving early

is that a hard boiled egg in your back pocket or is your penis just round and on the wrong side

Why is it in the house md font

there should be a jesus on the cross emoji. not for any religious reasons. just so I can use it for every slight inconvenience.

Many are not familiar with what is called a diva moment. Youre about to learn

you CANNOT read too much old timey fiction because I was playing Raft with the lads this morning and without a THOUGHT said we could sail over to another island "if the wind would consent to blow" & let me tell you. This did not pass by unremarked.

worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean

sorry i said something dickish. a few mildly frustrating things happened to me in succession and it turned me evil

womens clothing sizing is based on how much the company wants you to kill yourself

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to isolate myself before others could exclude me