it's real sweet to grow old

something you learn fast and necessarily when you get into the habit of writing is that you are riddled with blind assumptions, prejudices, unpractised rhetoric and all kinds of unchallenged cicada shell thoughts that were left stuck to your mode of being when bad ideas fled you. most people get to move through the world behind a kind of modesty veil that divides their internal thoughts from their external observations, but you have to take that off when you write. you have to suddenly present the whole world to itself nakedly, without the kindness of someone who can stop you mid-sentence and say "hold on, I know you, you can't possibly mean that". people are often scared to show their work to an editor in case the editor points out what they look like without their modesty veil, but god, christ, hell and heaven, you have to be more afraid of what the whole world of strangers will see if you don't let someone pick the cicada shells off you first.

obsessed with Dooley in black sails. background character for 35 episodes, then rapidly promoted to Plot Important after the silverflint divorce because toby stephens needs someone to make emmy nomination losing speeches and facial expressions against and every other possible contender is dead. overestimates his own plot importance, thinks he's going to get a good grade in being flint's partner (both normal to want and possible to achieve) by offering to kill his ex boystie (boy bestie) for him, and then dies with with most DUDE WTF??? expression anyone has ever made after being shot. rip, should know better than to get between flint and his homoerotic situationship. never stood a chance.

of course we can't forget about his equal and opposite, mr. beauclerc, who is never mentioned nor seen on-screen until 1x05 when flint places the success of a major plan in his hands. did pirate ships even have sharpshooters? can you sharpshoot with the gun technology back then? doesn't matter, because this man is the walrus' Designated Sniper. flint introduces beauclerc like he's an a-list gunman of whom we've all heard. ahh yes, the mr. beauclerc. and the best part? he lives up to the hype, no-scopes an utterly insane shot with Ye Olde Musket, and then never appears ever again.

pre hairwash melancholy

*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

problematic sudoku solving skills gap

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

Date idea: I lie face down on your bed and you pet my head for maybe 2 or 3 hours.

at my local thrift warehouse where nothing’s priced and you make an offer on all the stuff you find. well i told the person at the register i’m on a budget and didn’t know if i could afford a rug i wanted and asked what they’d take for it and without missing even half a beat they said “how about a cup of blood?” then they started hopping up and down like a cheerleader and said “cup! of! blood!”

we settled on seventeen dollars cash.

the problem is i love to riff with people so it got deeply deeply weird for about 3 and a half minutes before we finally agreed on the price.

babygirl you won't believe the amount of popular things i don't know