i hoard wips like a dragon

this might piss some people off but I don’t think some of you actually ever tried to unlearn your hatefulness. you just came out as queer and decided your new targets really truly deserve it this time.

*at a family gathering* you’re all like coworkers to me

horror movie showing a child’s drawing of the monster or ghost or whatever but instead of a little kid and crayons they’re like a preteen and it’s manga style

noticed my coworker was on tumblr so i told them “i like your shoelaces” and they said “never say that out loud to me”

this is the correct response btw

in fucking Tears thinking about how disgusting a baby griffin would look

i love!!! food!!! i love being alive and getting to eat delicious things!!! i love sourdough bread and sharp cheddar cheese and blackberry jam. i love custard buns so hot they almost burn your mouth and soup dumplings with sesame seeds toasted on. i love tea with milk and honey and tiny chewy matcha mochis, and i love salty pistachios right out of the shell. i love smoked fish and cured meat and the infinite variety of Stuff To Put On Rice. i LOVE food and love that i get to eat it. eating multiple times a day every single day forever, however, is a sadistic trap.

generally speaking, the cooler and better your offline political activities are, the more important it becomes that you do not post about it on your personal social media acconts

#explanation: this references the scene where Hektor the prince of troy goes to his wife after a battle and leans in to kiss his son #(who is still a baby and being held in andromache's arms) #but his son cringes away in fear of his father's battle helmet #it's a gut wrenching scene about how war dehumanizes you and separates you from the people you love #this interpretation implies that being a gamer is analogous

Women with big curly red hair always have like 12 gay guy friends why is that

if you pitched goncharov vs the dangerous crow boy (who destroys plastic) alongside one another to an outside person and asked them to choose which one was a tumblr fever dream and which one was a real thing published in the real world. i do not think they would choose correctly

Truly thrilled to finally find this post on my dash.

you're not allowed to bring wireless devices into classified areas and a security guy noticed a square phone-ish shape in my pocket so he asked me to show him what it was and i had to show him my can of pocket herring :/