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sambucky yuri be upon ye

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how often are you getting a headache
daily
weekly
monthly
couple times a year
yearly or less
how often are you getting a tummy ache
daily
weekly
monthly
every couple months
yearly or less
Ok so thanks for voting on this but i need you to reblog it too
Shane getting criticized for not using pride tape and he’s caught on a mic later that week saying I didn’t realize it wasn’t the sucking dick that made me gay but the rainbow . Which is how he comes out.
I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare
Concept - sometime in the 2015-16 season Marley is traded to Ottawa. Both he and Ilya make dramatic social media posts about their husband going off to war or whatever. The Cliff/Ilya fans eat it up with a spoon. In 2018, when Ilya signs with Ottawa too, even the more serious sports media find themselves briefly considering the idea that there might be something more to this friendship, because why else would Rozanov go to a bottom ranked team like Ottawa?
Shane goes back and forth between weird pointless jealously that people think Ilya is fucking Cliff and relief that this is like a weird added security around their real relationship.
Ilya and Cliff both find the whole thing fucking hilarious.
Ok but what if Ilya and Marley also keep helmet-picture-of-your-sweetheart style photos in their lockers (they're polaroids they took for this purpose in a field right before Marley moved away, and have a photo-of-the-dead-wife-at-the-start-of-a-film kind of vibe, they give them a lil smooch before home games for good luck)
Cut to later, Ilya doesn't know whats wrong with Shane. He thought that both of them playing for Ottawa would be a dream and it IS but Shane is acting distant and snappy in the locker room and holy shit it must be because hes ashamed he regrets the move and he hates the team and Ilya has ruined his life and now hes fully spiralling.
He goes to Shane and all but begs him to let him know what the matter is and what he can change about himself the locker room to fix this. And Shane has to sheepishly admit that he's jealous of the photo. To be clear hes not jealous of Marley, (he maybe was when Ilya was in Boston but knows now theres nothing between them) its just the photo.
Next time time they're in the locker room Shane notices there are still photos in Marley and Ilya's lockers but now they've been changed to pictures of him (Ilya took them when he was asleep). Marley makes a big show of his newly upgraded picture and has all of the team give the photo a peck before the next game. It is at this point Ilya abruptly realises that HE is suddenly jealous of anyone else kissing Shane's picture.

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If any of you ever feel like what you're doing for Palestine isn't helping anything, I'll tell you right now it's helping me. I know it is fortifying all of us who have been in this fight for years to see so many people willing to speak up. It has never been like this before.
The tide has already turned. The fact that #free palestine will have new posts everyday, that helps me. It helps my mental health knowing that Palestinians are less alone now than ever.
Yesterday I read some verses from the Quran talking about how "the blame" is not with those who wish to help but cannot, but with those who CAN help and do not.
Truly I do not care if all you do for Palestine is post in that #free palestine everyday, that is still more than many people with the means to do even more would do.
We see you. We see you standing in solidarity with us and with Palestinians. We love you. Thank you.
I have to keep reminding myself that the point of collective action is that it's collective.
It's terrifying and demoralizing that nothing thus far has stopped or more than briefly paused the genocide.
But that's not a reason to stop trying.
If you can protest in person, do that.
If you can donate, do that.
If you can write your officials, do that.
If you can click once a day, do it here: https://arab.org/click-to-help/palestine/
And if all you can do is share, do that.
Yuna:Â Congratulations. The two of you have just won gold and silver in the Moron Olympics.
Shane:
Ilya:
Shane:Â Who won gold?
Marleau coming out to Ilya as bisexual and tells him his celeb crush is Shane Hollander. Ilya experiences the nine circles of hell all at once in the following months, esp when Marleau goes into detail on how he would "hit that" (Bonus: Maybe Marley meets Shane and gets a "gay vibe" and tells Ilya he thinks he's gonna try and make a move. Ilya nearly pops a blood vessel)
Ok but what if Marleau DOES realise that this is pissing Ilya off, but ends up reaching the logical but wrong conclusion that Ilya is upset because Shane is his big rival and he doesnt want to see his (fanmade) thirst traps.
Cue Marleau sending Ilya dozens and dozens of photos and videos of Shane with thirstful narration and speculation about the hockey skill of their future children, whenever Ilya mildly irritates him.
Eventually Ilya moves away from Boston, but then Marleau has lost the ability to piss of Ilya in person, so has to double up on his tried and true methods, Shane is no longer referred to by name but simply as 'my hubby'.
Ilya has reached a previously unexplored level of hell and jealousy.
Hey all, while we're busy normalizing women with hairy legs, hairy armpits and bushy pubes, let's also normalize women with hairy upper lips, hairy chins, hairy side burns, hairy chests, and all the other places where women are supposedly magically hair-free.
Ilya Rozanov iPhone Notes Apology
orrrr ilya and troy having to record one of these bad boys after ilya is caught saying what’s up fag on his livestream

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Is Tumblr aware of Count Binface, current hope for our nation?
Let me explain:
Grotesque fascist grifter, Nigel Farage, is the leader of Reform, the racist far right party he created because UKIP got what it wanted (Brexit) and it sucked.
Having tried and failed to be an MP many times (but somehow getting more screentime than any Liberal Democrat or Green politician), he finally succeeded in the last election because people were so overwhelmingly pissed off with the Conservatives, and many right-wing people saw Reform as the new Conservative Party; partly because it's full of rejects from the Conservative Party.
Speculation: he doesn't really want to be an MP, he wants to be a fascist grifter. He's annoyed by suggestions he do things like Be In His Constituency and Serve His Constituents.
He's recently been caught having accepted a VERY large amount of money from some unsavory people that he insists was a totally legitimate 'donation' and not breaking any rules.
Only it did break the rules and it's very clear that it did and things are in motion to hold him to account.
To avoid this, he has resigned as an MP, saying this is a protest at his treatment by the 'establisment' (he is a rich fascist grifter, but he likes to cosplay as a Man of the People). This has triggered a by-election, in which he is standing, with the hope that the people of his constituency will either elect him in a resounding win, indicating they don't care that he's corrupt (having not heard everything the investigation is uncovering), or someone from Labour or the Conservatives will win and he can swan off to America, free to grift again because of what the 'establishment' did to him.
Only, all the major political parties have agreed not to stand, stating openly that this is an obvious stunt and they won't legitimise it. So if he doesn't win, he can't say it was because he was too much of a rebel and the Establishment went against him, he'll just be a loser, which doesn't play too well with the right-wingers he wants to grift. And if he does get back in the investigation will go forward without any kind of 'mandate' from his constituency buoying him up.
But. There is another option.
COUNT BINFACE IS RUNNING.
Count Binface is part of the grand British tradition of joke candidates who stand as a protest option. They usually don't get enough votes to get their deposit back (which is supposed to deter unserious people) but they don't care, because DEMOCRACY.
Of course, Count Binface has never won, but it is hilarious to see a completely serious pathetic fascist concede defeat while standing next to a man with a bin on his head to whom they are democratically equal.
But if nobody else is standing. And if enough people in Clacton-on-Sea are finally cheesed off enough with Farage not doing anything for them, there is just a chance that one of the funniest things to ever happen in politics will happen.
Imagine. Imagine for just a moment that the Grotesque Fascist not only loses, but loses to Count Binface.
not a day goes by that i don’t think of this
Jedi Duke Thomas
are non brits aware of count binface.
to give some entirely bizarre context, nigel farage (extreme cunt) has stepped down from his position as MP for clacton (due to a scandal where he received £5 million from a crypto billionaire that could have been laundered) only to run again so that he can prove people like him. and the only person running against him is count binface. who has been a staple of british politics for many years. and now the british press is forced to interview him seriously while he sits there with his binface.
sorry. correction. laurence fox is also there
Ilya never gets dementia. He worries about it, with his genetic predisposition and his frequent head injuries. But he never gets it.
His brother does.
His brother calls him, forgetting that Ilya went no-contact with him. Ilya's silent on the phone, listening to Alexei's wife softly explain it to him and take the phone.
He texts Ilya, asking when where he is. Asking who he's playing next game.
Ilya's been retired for over 20 years.
He knows Shane wants to say something, but he never does. He's just quietly supportive.
One day, it's Alexei's wife that calls him. She apologizes for calling. She tells him Alexei doesn't remember her anymore. Or their daughter. He only asks about Ilya and their parents. She offers to delete Ilya's number from his phone.
Ilya declines.
After that, he starts answering the phone. And talking.
Alexei asks where he is. Ilya tells him he's coming home soon. That seems to make Alexei happy.
Alexei asks who Ilya is playing. Ilya says Montreal. Alexei tells him to win or papa will be angry.
Alexei tells him mama made him soup. Ilya tells him that was his daughter. Alexei laughs, he doesn't have a daughter.
He doesn't remember how cruel he was to Ilya. He doesn't remember how much he loved drugs and drinking.
He was so much like Ilya's Alexei, before he started taking after their father. Before he let his anger at their mother consume him. Before he caught Ilya and Sasha and allowed his fear for his little brother to turn into anger and disgust.
One day Ilya offers his wife, Natalia, to have them visit. Their daughter has visited more than once, even stayed with them for a summer after high school. His and Shane's kids tried to teach her hockey.
Natalia regretfully tells him Alexei is not well enough to travel.
Ilya can't travel to them, not while he's married to Shane.
But their phone calls are enough.
About once a week, he gets to speak to a version of his brother than he had dearly missed. He gets to talk about his mama like she's still live, not dead for over 50 years. He gets to talk about the rink he and Alexei used to play hockey at. To talk about the stray cat he and Alexei once hid in their bedroom for a week.
He finds himself looking forward to the phone calls.
And dearly missing when they end.

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unless its egregious, i'm not embarrassed to be fooled by ai. "oh i got lied to via something made by the Lying Machine the machine we made to Lie really well" like it's gonna happen it's no egg on your face. just be chill about it
don't get me wrong. it's always devastating always humbling. no one wants to fall for the lying machine it just sounds bad. but you can't dwell
who wanna be friends with drawbacks