Let the Music Move You.

You're full of shit, Hawaiians are just able to levitate coconut milk.

It’s Fourth of July Eve so make sure to leave some milk and cookies out for Captain America

I THOUGHT AFTER FOUR YEARS YOU PEOPLE WOULD LET THIS DIE AND YET AGAIN I OPEN THIS CURSED APP TO FIND MORE NOTES ON THIS POST

My issue with Magic Baseball Mud isn't that I don't understand its purpose. I know it's really about standardisation; if the league didn't dictate the exact composition of the mud they use to take the shine off of new baseballs, each team would have their own formulation, and they would absolutely being Doing Shit to that mud in an effort to obtain some imagined advantage. Rather, I object precisely because I do know what it's for, and I want to live in a world where every team is playing stupid games with their mud and professional baseball players need to develop specific strategies to deal with the unique texture of their opponents' balls.

Like, imagine the Drama™. Imagine how many pages would be added to the rulebook at the professional level to nail down exactly what you are and are not permitted to smear all over your balls. Imagine the documented incidents which would produce and periodically expand that body of rules. By god, it would be glorious.

Why do they need to remove the shine at all?

It's hard to grip shiny balls.

this reads like it was submitted to a local newspaper in the early 1900s

porn will win

rb to bonk prev with an empty paper towel roll

Is that a miette?

Pride for you!  Pride for a thousand years!!

you COME OUT to miette? you come out to her as queer? oh! oh! pride for mother! pride for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears