had the horrifying realization earlier that kangaroos are marsupials convergently evolved into humans

there was probably a caveman 100000 years ago named netflix. we'd never know

the best online drama i've ever seen was a twitter callout for someone who was having sex with rollercoasters but over the course of the post it became increasingly clear that the person authoring the callout was also "dating" the roller coaster in question and was angry at being cheated on

when i was a kid i got banned on neopets for being hacked (neopets staff claimed hacking did not exist and I must have provided my password to someone in an attempt to cheat) so i, heartbroken, branched out to different virtual pet sites (many of which are now defunct). my favorite was called sorpiland, which had very little gameplay and was mostly just a forum where people chatted. once i got banned from the sorpiland forums for 3 days for writing and proudly posting the lyrics to my own sorpiland themed cover of kids of america, which the moderator, who had apparently never seen cinematic masterpiece jimmy neutron: boy genius, identified as plagiarism of the jonas brothers cover "kids of the future". another time i got banned for mentioning neopets, which the same moderator referred to as "the N word"