β¨ I've contemplated this post for over 48 hours, now, and to be honest- I'm still not sure I even want to post it. π§ It's not about to be short, either, so mega props in advance if you actually take the time to read it all.
The last year of my life has been excruciatingly difficult to navigate, both emotionally and physically- full of ups, downs, pain, trauma, medical problems, financial issues... you name it, I probably had to "deal with it" at some point or another. But that's the thing: I haven't been adequately "dealing with" ANYTHING. I've been running in circles avoiding every sign of complexity, trauma, guilt, fear & burying myself so deep inside of a big black hole that I didn't even recognize myself anymore.πͺβ‘
I'm not saying that there hasn't been any good moments in my life, because there absolutely have been. Mike & I got married, I started a new business, got a new job that I LOVE, my kids are my entire reason why & my family and friends have done nothing but support me and try to help me through this literal hell I've been going through. I am grateful for all of the amazing things I have been blessed with... but that does not mean I'm not struggling.ππ
I've created an AWESOME social media presence and I know deep down I belong in the business of service & sharing- hence the reason for this post. So many of my loyal followers (including friends & family) have noticed my presence (more like LACK thereofπ) recently... & I know I need to be honest. So here goes nothing...
I am *temporarily* distancing myself from the many realms of social media and redirecting my attention inwards. I've spent so much time making sure my surroundings and the people in them were happy and filled up, that I've completely forgotten what it means to know myself and love who I am. I've taken "coping" to a level more comparable to *neglecting* & am fully aware of how dangerous it's becoming. I am putting myself in a very vulnerable position by admitting this, but I know it's a key part of the process.π
I will be documenting my journey in a more private blog setting, & you're more than welcome to check in and follow me @[LinkINcomments] to see how things are going over here on the SOBER, IN THERAPY, "DEALING WITH SHIT" TRAIN... π