bomp tomp

would you put a discarded fruit sticker on my forehead in whimsical jest yes or no

“We’re born alone and we die alone” you were born alone? Your mom wasn’t there?

My god this is applicable to so many situations: this is in no way a WE situation.

I love all this. So good. And I once saw a friend pull out the ONLY ACCEPTABLE PARENT LINE in a situation like this: “Are you hurt, or just scared?” IT WAS LIKE MAGIC. The kid paused, inhaled, looked down at the body part in question, then looked back up and said, all calm again, “Oh, just scared!” and back to business as usual.

today's children are gonna become teens and clown the shit out of us for 'eepy' and 'blorbo' but they'll say it in cocomelonese so we won't understand them

today’s eepy blorbo is yesterday’s heckin doggo is last week’s smexy bishie

I hate that you're right and that I understood all of that.

the commodification of friendship is the most annoying thing to come out of the internet in ages. like actually i love to break this to you but you're supposed to help your friends move even if it's hard work. or stay up with them when they're sad even if you're gonna lose sleep. you're supposed to listen to their fears and sorrows even if it means your own mind takes on a little bit of that weight. that's how you know that you care. they will drive you to the airport and then you will make them soup when they're sick. you're supposed to make small sacrifices for them and they are supposed to do that for you. and there's actually gonna be rough patches for both of you where the balance will be uneven and you will still be friends and it will not be unhealthy and they will not be abusive. life is not meant to be an endless prioritization of our own comfort if it was we would literally never get anywhere ever. jesus.

The Hague, Netherlands: Spanish street musician Borja Catanesi and the 68 year old dancer from The Hague mr Roland Parijs

imagine just playing your guitar and you come across the FUNKIEST grandpa

wizard duel

wizard collaboration

trying to have sex with my point-n-click wife but she keeps saying "hmm...i don't think those two things go together"

Oh god please turn the sound on

My cat came over and looked at me as if I lost my mind. He is acting like he thinks I made these sounds.

why IS his quest literally just called The White Boy. that’s so much to me