Love Begins
trying on a metaphor
I'd rather be in outer space πΈ
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
β£ Chile in a Photography β£
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
NASA
if i look back, i am lost
#extradirty
Monterey Bay Aquarium
Origami Around
ellievsbear
Show & Tell
EXPECTATIONS
shark vs the universe
official daine visual archive
Jules of Nature
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@immagotobed
imagine if firefighters didnt go into a burning building full of children because they were scared of being burned. police are fucking worthless
βDefund the policeβ is now just practical economics. Why pay for something that doesnβt even work???
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He waited 14 hours for the squirrel to start his Rube Goldberg machine
Rube Goldberg would be proudβ¦
"Oh you had a plague? Come back to us when you had a World War, brand new unconventional weapons, and a new international order."
I apologize.
insert that YOU chihuahua post where theyre being pinned down i cant for the life of me find it
This one?
Oh, Charles. The hubris. Honey. You had to know this was a possibility. Why would you tempt Apollo like that.
I love how we don't even need Apollo to be captioned, it's just "he's holding a dodgeball and looks Greek statue, of COURSE it's Apollo delivering the gift of prophecy unto unsuspecting tumblr users"
why does every cartoon character wear these underwear:
why don't u
because if I wore these underwear the universe would conspire to constantly put me in situations where my pants would get pulled down or destroyed and itβs so hard to find good pants
I have a few pairs of these exact underwear, which I wore whenever possible as a camp counselor.
The reason was that, if you get pantsed, and you weren't in on the joke / it wasn't planned, that's a massive breakdown in respect and discipline, and you have to make an example of that kid (generally by wrestling them, and in serious cases, taking away candy privileges). But getting pranked is still a bad look, and makes it seem cool to rebel against your authority.
However, if you get pantsed, and you are in on the joke, everyone has a good laugh, including you, and no one was actually rebelling. It both makes you look like a cool authority figure and makes the person doing it look like they're the sort of person in cahoots with counselors. Then, if there's a behavioral issue, you can have that quiet conversation later, away from an audience.
And since those underwear are so culturally specific as punchlines in a pantsing gag that the only plausible reason to be wearing them is if you're in on a slapstick act, you can retroactively Shanghai any would-be prankster into looking like they did it with your consent and planning, which not only keeps you from indignity, it makes sure that they're rewarded by laughter and attention for looking like they're cooperating with the staff, encouraging that in the future and bringing them in from the outside of the social-reward structure you're trying to set up, where it's cool too be wacky but responsible.
That preparation effort paid off maybe four times across three years, but it was completely worth it.
The downside, of course, is that when one of your kids goes missing in a storm when it's hailing and pouring sheets of water, and you don't have many dry clothes left, you're reduced to running through the rain looking for them in your underwear, which are situationally inappropriate / jarringly comical to the full extent possible.
I have literally never put more than 3 seconds of thought into what pair of underwear Iβm going to wear. Meanwhile tumblr user theevenprime is playing 6 dimensional chess with their undergarments.
I guess I gotta step my game up.
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thoughts on tiktok?
my sincerest apologies to miss kesha i have nothing but respect for the party anthem of all time
If I was JK Rowling I would tweet "All of Pan-Serbia gets one wizard school" and turn off my phone
What if JK Rowling posted a global map of all wizard schools but South America was united as Grand Columbia and she refused to comment on it.
The Wizard School for southeast Asia is in Taiwan. North Korea has its own school. For some reason, China is labelled as "Outer Mongolia."
Rhodesia is still there.
East and West Pakistan not only still exist, but they each have their own, separate Wizarding school. Somehow, India does not
India's Wizarding school is in the Caribbean because it was founded by Columbus
this is really just my favorite tiktok
thereβs so many things going on here that we canβt talk about right now
how dare you hide this in the notes
wait now I'm curious. if your mutuals could come visit you right now what would be the first thing you'd show them from your town/city?
the penis that the virgin mary statue illuminates onto the local catholic church every night when they shine a light in her
ID: The exterior of a catholic church at night. The church building is of fairly modern construction. The wall is made of taupe colored stonework and has a large ceoss afixed to the center. In the garden in front of the building there is a statue of the virgin Mary lit by a large spotlight. The statue The spotlight is on the ground while the statue is of Mary praying and curved slightly. It also stands on a plinth and is several feet above the spotlight. The resultant angles cause the Mary statue to create a penis shaped shadow on the wall of the church. The shadow almost completely covers the cross. The plinth create ls a very regular shadow making it appear as if there's a curved dildo casting a shadow on the cross. End ID
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[id: Comic drawn in a cartoon style. Text of comic reads: "How to spot a kettle: Police may try to surround the march on all sides in a 'kettle'. If you're kettled, they might hold you there for hours (they often lie about when they're gonna let you go) or even arrest everyone. Look out for a prisoner transport bus. If you see a kettle coming, the safest exit is usually back the way you came." End id.]
THAT IS ACTUALLY AMAZING!
Sometimes, my town does shit that is good.
DO LANDLORDS NEXT.
Do you actually want a partner or are you just afraid that your friendships will likely weaken over time as your friends start to prioritize their spouses/families over you, and even if they continue to value you as a friend, eventually you will end up largely alone and unable to relate to the life experiences of the people you once cherished?
do you actually want a partner or are you depressed and looking outward for an example of happiness and all you ever see is the same thing you don't want that everyone says you need
for the record this IS an apple hate zone yes I have an android phone yes I have a bulky PC with its own USB port yes I use wired headphones. you can go ahead and try to fight me on it but keep in mind how scrappy I must be considering Iβm broke as shit and have nothing to lose and can guarantee my phone screen wonβt shatter in the brawl
I just finished a delicious cosmic crisp and for the first ten words of this I was ready to fight you
for the record this IS an apple the tech company specifically hate zone I would never dare insult the humble fruit which has done so much for us that said my personal preference is fuji all the respect though
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i love motifs i love recurring themes i love symbolism i love foreshadowing i love impactful narratives
im like if a boy was the worst girl in the world
