DizzyDog's Den

you may think to yourself something to the effect of “this is fucked up” or “this is sad” and yet you could leave your house right now and go buy a vape at the gas station, but these squirrels cannot. so maybe check your privilege before you start jumping to conclusions.

The existence of a safeword also implies the existence of a dangerword that you can use to instantly turn any sexual event into a combat encounter

#it exists and it's 'feel how cold my hands are'

cake is such an underappreciated band. i can’t believe we brought back low rise flare jeans before we brought back cake in the top 40

i’m just saying cake’s music would be widely regarded as so sexy if it wasn’t for all the mariachi horns and vibraslap and the vocalist didn’t always sound like he was explaining his suicide plans to a gun store clerk in sacramento. the world wasn’t ready for them

The fact that it sounds like a dispassionate reading of a terrorist manifesto is a feature

[about to give you head] [doesn't know how to talk dirty at all] umm the huge cock store called they said they want this back

they call it his achilles heel because ack! It killies him

They call it the Odyssey because it really do be Odd at Sea

I'm at a :.|:; for words.