i was right, all hail me

could you lie

"it's not that deep" START DIGGING!!

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

OOPS TOO DEEP

ok we can do petplay but Only if I’m the fly. If that’s ok… rubs my hands together … zzzzzz…. Hope I don’t get swatted…. Zzzzzzzzz

died at the window sill

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

lot of people commenting on this post like "who eats lunch at 4pm that's a terrible time to eat lunch" yes. that is the point. 4pm lunch is inadvisable. 4pm lunch is not the ideal. 4pm lunch makes the mind demons real.

WTF are the horses doing

i don't fucking know i tried my best but i think we made it worse with our big hooves

WHY WERE YOU INVOLVED AT ALL ??

i don't knowwww *kicks in frustration and hits humpty dumpty again* fuckkkkkkk

STOP

EVERYOBODY GET DOWN HES TAKING A CREATIVE LIBERTY

“knowing how to write effective AI prompts will be a valuable skill in the future” and what if I skip all that and write the email myself in under 30 seconds drawing from my very own biological database of language and rhetoric (my brain)?

i really genuinely wish I could hit chatgpt with my bare fists and hear its pityful electronic voice fade into glitched robotic gibberish and choking beeps as I hit it before I smash it for good and it shuts the fuck up forever

why are so many people wondering if I'm horny for chatgpt. it's like the most unfuckable robot ever created heeell NO

if you've ever pet more than a few dogs you'd Know what dog residue is

you cannot advertise to me in a way that matters

Oh my god, did you guys hear??? Chappell Roan was at a big baseball match and instead of hitting the ball, she hit a Christian Baby?!? It was a home run, too.

i would trust weird al with my drink at a party. granted he may put one of those capsules that expands into a sponge animal in it,

stop liking my posts and start sloppy tongue kissing me instead