Billy Crystal Pig Girlboss

Open my eyes, and I see, heaven's changing

[…] je ne puis m'empêcher de dire que la salade n'est point une nourriture naturelle à l'homme, tout omnivore qu'il soit; il n'y a que les ruminants qui soient nés pour brouter l'herbe crue; or, la salade, réduite à sa plus simple expression, n'est que de l'herbe crue. La preuve? c'est que notre estomac ne digère point la salade, attendu que l'estomac ne sécrète que des acides, et que l'herbe crue n'est dissoute que par les alcalins,[…] L'homme, à qui Dieu, dit Ovide, a donné un visage sublime, os sublime, l'homme n'est pas fait pour brouter l'herbe, mais pour regarder le ciel, toujours au dire du même Ovide. […] C’est tout simplement une hérésie culinaire.

which translates more or less to:

THE VAMPIRE LESTAT

The Blanched Soldier

For this end-of-career investigation into the disappearance of a gentleman’s army mate, we are astonished to hear from Holmes himself for the first time. There is no denying that Holmes’ narration lacks Watson’s warmth and poetic touch, but his two stories are not as inferior as some critics seem to think. It is true that compared to his earlier recollections in "The Gloria Scott” and “The Musgrave Ritual”, they could do with some joie de vivre, but that is only in keeping with the tone of the other tales from The Case-Book, including those narrated by Watson. What is evident is that, at the time he is writing these, Holmes does miss his friend terribly and funnels his loneliness into sarcastic remarks, as he is wont to do.