I love predictions of the future that oscillate between "eerily prescient" and "what the hell are you talking about?" Like that description of the year 2,000 written in 1933 where the author predicts flatscreen television, the glass wall trend in the homes of the wealthy, and the obsolescence of stuffed mattresses, but is also convinced that normal showers will be replaced by a device called the VAPOR LANCE that VAPORIZES the DIRT on you

Sometimes Apollo hits writers with prophecy and sometime it’s Hephaestus trying to make a pitch for his new product

the only thing stronger than the gastric distress i get from eating cherries is my love for eating cherries

what

thank you. im once again reminded why i love tumblr because where else could i get content like this

nine inch noah: i want to fuck you like two of every animal

AAA video game publisher voice: "Look. The goose layed a golden egg, and that's nice! Everyone loved that egg. But keeping the golden goose means paying for bird feed and I don't want to, so I killed the goose."

The pyromancer always wins

Until death, all defeat is psychological.

Whenever I come back to Tumblr and check the activity, it’s always this post still getting some notes here and there.

when i erase a word with a pencil where does it go

are you okay

They turn into those eraser shavings and then you swipe them off your desk and they land on the floor and someone steps on them and they stick on their shoe and eventually the person goes home so right now your word is at someones house

maybe its watching them take off their clothes yeah get it word

this fucking site i swear to god 

i hope people know that the “sad tomato cat” meme is a series of images that have a happy ending…… she is cared for and loved!!!!

hey guysss so unfortunately the rumors are true and im leaving the narrative. Buttt the good news is my absence will create such a gaping hole in your lives that it will become a sort of presence itself, and so in a way it will kind of be like i never left! But i am. Leaving just to be clear.