swagadocious

cop pulls me over little does he know my drivers license is written in elf hieroglyphics & blinds anyone who reads it

"it's inscrutable" maybe to you it is. I scrute it all the time

i scrute the milkfish

"Star Trek: Deep Space Nine functions as a refutation of the utopianism of The Next Generation because it highlights the moral compromises captains need to make to do their jobs" no, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine functions as a refutation of the utopianism of The Next Generation because every time some existentially horrifying shit happens to Miles O'Brien he's still expected to show up for work the next day.

My family talks constantly about how messed up O'Brien's Starfleet career is. We see him getting therapy ONCE and he's just expected to otherwise deal. Someone provide justice for that man.

punished by the council

I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.

blond people are either laura palmer or jake paul

lestat is jake paul. stop your madness

it's called a museum because me 'n' u see 'em

How do you go through all the effort of setting up a sous vide to do this????

never tell me that magic isnt real ever again when this is clear evidence of a person transmogrifing Meat into Wood

i can transmogrify meat into wood by lookin at pictures of titties if ya get what im sayin

hey, we all love tiddies here but this person has perpetrated a crime against nature and we need you stay focused

People of america, when I took office with the mandate to kidnap every gamer neet from their home and force them to dig water retention berms in the desert many said we were crazy. "They'll all die of heatstroke," "their weak bones will snap after an honest days work," "their pallid skin will melt in the sun." Well I stand here today to admit you were all right, my bad.

The policy will continue