"I can't attack that."

I want soup but I've already fully committed to bedtime

I've been laying in bed thinking about wanting soup for almost 2 hours

The votes on this post. Oh. A poem in poll form, interactive art, the fact we can see how the other people reading it felt. im. this is really good.

count dracula? uhhh ok. one

🧛 nathing vrong vith me

best thing tumblr ever did for me is the term "rotating it in my mind". it's really true that sometimes you think about something real hard but you can't tell what the thoughts are exactly. it's revolutionary stuff, i might even say

The tumblr blorbo in the blorbo tumbler.

How your email finds me

"BEGONE, FOUL FALSE INTELLIGENCE!! "

The scrying cube is filled with ill portents.

"I am being catfished, Tad Cooper!"

Are you doing okay? We missed you at the devil's sacrament. He mentioned you by name. Everyone was looking around and cheering until we realized you weren't there. If you need to talk I'm always here. At the aforementioned devil's sacrament.

alternate title: young children gawk at flaming homosexuals

Another alternate title: the bailey school kids need to mind their own damn business

So am i the only one thinkinf the ghoul looks cute asf or

you either die a bailey school kid or you live long enough to see yourself become the gay cryptid.

Hello, we’re big computer company. We are truly grateful for your support! Our latest update will add a giant shit in the middle of your screen. You cannot remove it.

normalise saying ''what the fuck is wrong with you'' to mean people

Easter egg for office workers: if you go onto Excel and press ctrl+right, then ctrl+down, you will reach cell XFD1048576. If you put a dot in there, then ctrl+A and fill every cell in black, you can then print 34 million black pages from your office printer and get fired

Thank you for the intrusive thought to carry into my Excel training this afternoon.

A customer contacted our team with questions, and then finished their email with: "I am daunted by the complexities and unknowns." I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since.

Reblog if you are daunted by the complexities and unknowns

I love it when dogs try to help but the task at hand requires zero dogs so they just kinda stand in front of you and look serious.

middle aged men do this too

yeah okay ill reblog that

dude why did you just walk up to me and quicksave