¡narcisista!

replacing my mental illness with vampirism

theres been a lot of activity lately in the Fucking Your Mom fandom i just thought id let you know. sorry you had to find out like this

call me fandom spaces. the way im dominated by women

I'm glad you're sticking to your roots with the femdom jokes <3

anything for you, lesbian clone of me

you shouldve raised a baby girl you shouldve called a better saul!!!!!!!

wheres seasons greasons

its that time of year again

It doesn’t have to be

its not optional

so give me all your pronouns and give me all your pills or whatever gerard way said

welp. to the shredder

my friend liz downloaded some free audio software a few months ago to do something and now every time she joins a call a female voice says “trial. trial.” and liz doesn’t remember the name of the software or know how to stop it and she doesn’t want to

my friend liz had her spotify account hacked and literally didn’t realize for a year until I was talking about my decade in review playlist and she looked at hers and it was all brazilian music and she was like oh this explains why I would go to sleep listening to classical music and wake up and it’s playing trap. and also why there are like 30 playlists on my account that I didn’t make. she just thought spotify was like that

hand to god at some point my friend liz managed to fuck up her install of Portal so bad that it was displaying minecraft textures

speaking of america’s favorite fruit (not optional) i love applerankings.com so fucking much. absolute necessity for any real Appleheads out there