history is a little man in a brown suit

So some fanartist drew a “sexy” (read: booby) version of a (cartoon) character who is traditionally very non-sexualised. Fans of the character got mad about it because it’s kind of groundbreaking how that character is written and portrayed and this art totally ignores the entire point of the character. They demanded the art be deleted. In response to that other people said, well what the fanartist did may be distateful but they have every right to draw what they’re into. The two sides fight for days and each starts a harassment campaign and even report their “opponents’” accounts.

So far so typical. But things eventually come to a head and they decide that this will be settled by votes - not through a poll. Through donations to a children’s education charity via each side’s portal. Whoever can get the highest amount of donation wins.

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN EARN THE LOVE OF MY CITIZENS!

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN ADEQUATELY PREPARE MY SUCCESSOR!

EMPEROR OF HAN: I say, these false maidens who attendeth My every act fill me with a deep dread. And I, a man with many conc'bines, speak thusly!

[Enter QIN SHI and BAT, the servant]

QIN SHI: Thou ungrateful cut-sleeve! I shall court these maidens!

SKYLINE: Marqius, he doth speak truth. Thou art a homosexual As the good Lord Qin Shi surely implies.

EMPEROR OF HAN: Fie! I am your emperor, ungrateful knave!

QIN SHI: The good Marquis doth desire of the very gods That he might have a fraction of mine imperial glory!

EMPEROR OF HAN: Glory? A grand jest! Thou sayest this, But I am one of the noblest emperors in China While thou hast need to put "shut up about the mercury" In thine bio! Speak not to me about glory!

QIN SHI: Fie! Thou knave! I am possessed by no man! I say, I am possessed by no man! I, the glorious emperor, can earn the love of my citizens Adequately prepare my successor Establish a stable dynasty!

i would like to add some information for the peasants; my FULL TITLE is qin shi huangdi, which in your barbaric tongue translates to “the first emperor of qin.”

someone sent me an anon ask about rocky meeting eva and i tried to post it not once but twice and tumblr ate it both times so now im just regular posting it here

i think ryland would grow to understand stratt’s choice with time, and even thank her logic of it because it led to his meeting of rocky, but i dont think he’d ever really forgive her for what she did to him

(Ryland had to prep rocky before they touched down to meet Stratt so he wouldnt charge her at first sight)

Eva Stratt:

"come again?"

"i learn more from thinking machine. human gender preference. attraction to same gender, means word 'gay.' all eridian same gender." rocky stands straight up. "rocky come out to grace now. all rocky plural gay, statement."

"...wow, that's... rock, i'm not sure it makes much sense to apply human ideas of sexual orientation to a monogendered species."

a long and judgmental pause. then:

"It would have been easier if you'd just said yes."

Fey: Very well. When you return home tonight, your mother will be in pristine health again. It will be like she never fell ill at all. Even the memory of her suffering will fade…

Human: Thank you so much. She means everything to me.

Fey: I know, I know. Let’s hope the price wasn’t too much for you after all… Only time will tell.

Human: So, when do we start?

Fey: …If I may ask you to elaborate?

Human: You said you wanted my firstborn.

Fey: Yes? And you agreed?

Human: Yeah, so, when do we start?

Fey:

They released an album too! I don't think this song is on it but the rest of their stuff is SO GOOD !!