I thought it was a good idea at the time

camilla hect is such a dad. get that girl some cargo shorts and the thumbs-up emoji, stat!

happy father’s day to the one and only camilla hect

I live a very balanced life of noticing things nobody else does and not noticing the things that literally everybody notices

“never work with children, griddle, their prefrontal cortexes aren’t developed.” this is coming from harrowhark nonagesimus, who is not only 17 years old, but also, arguably, has the worst decision-making skills of any character in the modern literary canon. maybe go develop your own prefrontal cortex instead of doing irreparable damage to it, beloved, and we can chat.

The Locked Tomb is a story about one girl's body being passed around by a bunch of souls like a blunt

crazy how there are only 2 hours of doing things every day before you keel over and die. if this werent normal id be worried

reblog if you remember having to ration your text messages and accidentally opening the internet on your phone was the end of the world

anybody out there hiring gay losers. ideally a 100k/year salary and i work for one hour every day when i feel like it. thanks

truly do not understand how people just slip into relationships and jobs and opportunities and friend groups and lifestyles. to me there are a million obstacles to navigate in a single basic conversation

sometimes i struggle to use the word ‘bootlicker’ in a negative sense because of sexual desires i will not disclose here

Is it licking boots?

because of sexual desires i will not disclose here.