"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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Claire Keane

Kiana Khansmith
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

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@dorfird

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i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it
Humanity’s first contact with Vulcans was some guy going “I’m down to fuck.”
Vulcans’ first contact with Humans was an emphatic “Sure.”
@sineala
#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan
“sir…these…these humans…they greet each other by…” *glances around before furtively whispering* “by clasping hands…”
*prolonged silence* “oh my…”
“sir…sir how will we make first contact with them? surely we…we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??”
*several pensive moments later* “contact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, he’ll put his hands on anything”
Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: “….my day has come.”
The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Y’all just be makin’ up names for characters that already have names.
Bonus: here’s a screencap of Solkar doing the “my body is ready” pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochrane’s hand:
I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are “distant xenophobes” or “horny on main for humanity”. Also apparently this guy is Spock’s great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.
Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkar’s descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so I’m not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkar’s descendants and humans, but I’m also not….not….saying that.
actual footage of first contact makeouts
The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes Cockrane’s–I’m sorry, Cochrane’s–hand… The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual… It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkar’s part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.
That’s why he’s so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar can’t believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him can’t believe how good it is.
I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkar’s pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochrane’s firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.
No wonder Solkar is all like, “TAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.”
And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.
Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.
#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew it (via kittykatthetacodemon)
Some Vulcan: we could probably just explain that handshakes are intimate in our culture
Solkar, rubbing lip gloss on his hand: don’t tell me how to do my job
This is my favourite Star Trek post, complete with headcanons, corrections, the truth coming out of her well to shame Spock even. Seriously perfect fandom work.
They could have explained none of it and responded to the offered hand with a polite bow. First contact was gonna be with the guy who proved they were technologically ready for it but any human aware of Japan and China would recognise that
Biblically accurate bisexual
Being a Minor in Online Fandom Spaces
(was asked to put my Bluesky thread on tumblr)
Just because of some stuff I saw yesterday: if you are a minor online, please do not openly identify yourself as such. It is not safe, it allows adults who want to interact with minors for bad purposes to know you are one.
There are different, safer ways to accomplish your goals than to do that.
You do not need to identify yourself publicly as a minor online to:
Ask that people respect your boundaries
Not create or interact with adult material
Not be a victim of harassment
Not give away personal information
All these are normal things anyone of any age can do online.
If you are being invited into spaces you don't want to be in as a minor, or which people have asked you not to be in as a minor, decline for any or no reason. If an adult wants to do something with you they should not with a minor, decline for any or no reason. If people do not accept that, they are not people you should be interacting with. Don't pretend to be an adult, just don't say you aren't.
I understand that recently, more people under 18 tend to say that they are under 18 to protect themselves online. People who are not dangerous don't need that information. People who are dangerous will gladly use it because they know you are vulnerable. You are not protecting yourself.
As an adult who doesn't really care to interact with minors, I probably won't interact a lot with you if you are "young." That's not hard to catch from the way people act online. If you are "young" I care about you being safe and not victimized by opportunists, regardless of your birth year.
Protect your identity and safety on the internet, and if you are a person who is vulnerable, be a mysterious figure. Make silly posts. Complain about "people you know." Complain about "living with your parents."
I know you want to interact online. You have to be safe if you do.
You don't owe anyone personal information ever at any time. But also, be wary of cheeky fun posts that try to prompt you into sharing where you live or your age by proxy — posts like "oh tell me where you're from and your thoughts about X" or "tell me your thoughts on generation whatever" may seem innocent but you may end up exposing yourself when you interact with them.
Anyone can be discarded by society
People get made fun of for being scared of aging but it comes from the very real fear of being discarded by society that’s why i always say the goal is not to never become old or disabled the future comes for us all the goal is better social policy

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I wholeheartedly believe that we are living through the transition period of Modern English into the next permutation of English. I just really wish that the scholars who named them "Old English," Middle English," and "Modern English" had considered the possibility of the far future because now we're probably going to wind up with the next one being called "Post-Modern English," and I cannot explain how much I hate that.
I propose that we start transitioning now, from calling it “Modern English” to calling it “Elizabethan English” — being the version of English that ran roughly from the reign of Elizabeth I to the reign of Elizabeth II
you can believe victims about what they experienced and also not want to torch the lives of the people they've accused without proof. that is a space you can walk in and usually it's not even that hard. I say this as a survivor of domestic violence. "believe victims" doesn't mean get torches and pitchforks any more than "innocent until proven guilty" means victims are lying. please please learn this "believe victims" isn't about the perpetrators it's about the victims
People will be like "Actually, the authoritative data from reliable sources says cops are good and love helping people" and you'll be like "What are these reliable sources" and they'll be like "We asked the cops and that's what they told us"
big pharma will try to sell u $20 cold medicine like spicy ramen doesnt cost like a dollar a pack and orgasms are free
damn british people cant cum..... this is so sad.......
big chemist will try to sell you £20 paracetamol like beans dont cost like a quid a can and havin a wank costs fock all
Big volume #FencepostOfTheWeek
bob moss

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Strength After… is a hub to share stories of hope and recovery encompassing all types of natural and human-caused disaster.
I really wish this website was more well known. It's a place to share stories about recovering from disaster. It's part of the Disaster Distress Hotline, and it can be great to scroll through and just see that you're not alone in what you've gone through/are going through.
important things happening in r/cats
So:
The cat was raised by chickens
The cat imprinted on the chickens
The cat thinks it's a chicken
The cat steals baby chickens to raise
The chicks are being raised by a cat
The chicks will imprint on the cat
The chickens will think they are cat
The chickens will steal kittens to raise
(Go to step 1)
Living by the ocean is just like … she has brought me a gift today from beyond our shores, she is a kind and giving mother, and sometimes that gift is a giant wooden cross for some reason
Or a fucking Garfield phone
an entire wasteland of what are lovingly known as “penis fish”
Or a huge-ass prehistoric tree.
thank you mother ocean, we say from the bottom of our hearts: what the fuck.
Wondermark #1582; Limit Your Scream Time
tomorrow i have to give my daughter’s pikachu plushie gender-affirming surgery
(original tags: she literally had tears in her eyes while she explained that her pikachu had a boy tail shape. i was like hey she can still be a girl. all we know from her body shape is what her body is shaped like. maybe if we asked her she would say that she feels like she’s really a girl. and my kid was like BUT POKEMON CANT TALK 😭😭😭😭 so i was like ‘ok. pikachu. if you want to use he/him say ‘pika’. if you want to use she/her say ‘chu’. and if you want smth else say ‘pikachu’’. and my daughter had her say ‘chu’ and i was like see there you go! now. she doesn’t HAVE to change her tail shape. she can totally be a girl with a rectangle tail. but if she would feel more comfortable with heart shape bc she prefers it, or so that people won’t assume she’s a boy, i can make that happen. so pikachu what do you think? do you want tail surgery? and pikachu agreed enthusiastically! so. plushie gender-affirming surgery first thing tomorrow i guess!)
her results look great, congrats pikachu! 💖⚡️🏳️⚧️
to have a parent like this

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I've said it before and I'll say it again. We need a "This is absolutely NOT mature content" feedback button on posts. You can report a post as missing a community label. We should also be able to report posts as having a comminity label when they dont fucking need one.
Lionel Fitzgerald, From an Upstairs Window, Winter - c.1950-51