The Mischief Of Tad

idk if this is an usamerican thing or not but it always blows my mind as a small european country resident that yall have many names and types of apples???? what do you mean its not just red yellow or green??? why is it so complicated??? who is granny smith????

'whats your favorite apple' 'red' 'no i mean like what type' '??????' actual conversatiom i've had with a mutual from usa

the world is so big and beautiful

writing tip: put words on page. hope this helps. i will not be taking questions because i have not done this

Babysitting a toddler is a lot like being the narration in a point-and-click adventure game. Watching him knock on the doors of empty rooms and saying "hmm. I don't think anyone's in there". Watching him attempt to use [spoon] on [cat] and saying "I don't think those things go together". Watching him throw a cup of water onto the floor and just commenting "the floor is wet now" when he looks up at me to see if I approve.

NSFW/Not Safe for Work is a funny concept to me because I have on separate occasions worked as 1. a creator of porn comics for an online subscription service, 2. a film archivist, digitizing material for the The Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction. I got to experience the dissonance of writing a crisp, professional email to my editor like I was taught to in art school and then attaching 18 pages of dong pictures to it. I've called a coworker over to dispassionately watch hardcore pornography over my shoulder so that they could help me make sure I was scanning a film at the correct frame rate. We were both wearing lab coats at the time. In terms of raw percentage, I have likely spent half or more of my professional life working in situations where it would not be all that unexpected to see someone's hole(s) in the course of my duties.

One time in my archiving job I was scanning a film from probably the 1960s or so, and the male performer looked straight down the barrel of the lens, so I had this transcendent moment of connection through time and space and the medium of film with a stranger whom I will likely never meet, who may indeed be no longer living on this earth, and then he turned away and started railing a woman. Felt like I got whiplash.

Creating ships for the tax write-off

Creating ships to get that fucking whale.

creating ships to wedge into the Suez canal and disrupt global shipping

everyone talks about how strong and great Aragorn was for refusing the ring when Frodo offered it to him as if this man has not spent his entire life dodging leadership and responsibilities like bullets in the matrix 🙄

In my next life I will be reborn as #horses.

I regret to inform you I’m #gnu terry pratchett trash.

My body is but a #spock temple.

hang on i gotta google something

i do not “delete sentences” when they start “hindering the plot” i COPY PASTE THEM into a SEPARATE DOC made just for keeping all my USELESS LINES that i will also NEVER USE so therefore i should JUST DELETE THEM but i DONT because id FEEL BAD if i did

You don't actually have to kill your darlings. You can just put them in the oubliette #myoubliette