Maybe A Sunflower. Or not.

Why did he keep calling the Iran war an excursion? Because he didn't understand the phrase military incursion

Why did he say the AI picture of him as Jesus was supposed to be a doctor? Because he was told to say it was doctored

Harriet's spent an entire book wondering how one could possibly reconcile a life of the mind and a life of the heart, because it seems like your only options are to give yourself over to passionate emotions that destroy your mind, or to retreat into an emotionless intellectual life that withers the heart.

Both seem dangerous because on the one hand, she suspected that the lonely intellectual life could drive someone insane, but what drove someone insane in this case was focusing on emotions to the exclusion of all rational thought. She can't choose either, but can't see a way to have both.

Then in the final moment before Peter's final marriage proposal, they go to a concert. Not just a concert, but a duet. Two musicians working in counterpoint--playing individual tunes that weave perfectly into one complete song.

To the appreciative Peter, music is

ravishing heart and mind together.

And here's the solution. The perfect analogy. In music, the heart and mind aren't opposites, but partners. Emotion turns the orderly and intellectual into something beautiful. Order elevates emotion into something sublime. You don't have to cut out all passion or give it free rein--you can control it. You don't have to suppress the mind to experience passion--knowledge can enhance the passion.

As a romantic analogy, it goes even further, because music can be played by two people in different ways. They can be individuals whose melodies entwine into counterpoint. One person's melody can be supported by the other's harmony. Neither one is necessarily better or worse--it's a matter of taste. Which do you prefer? Which can you best play, best appreciate?

Harriet didn't have to reject marriage because of some bad examples of marriage, just as she doesn't have to reject all music because bad songs exist. What matters is this particular person, this particular song. Can she and Peter work together to make something she finds beautiful?

AUTISM RESPONSE: Rubber ducks and other rubber bath toys can accumulate mold on the inside because of small holes underneath where moisture becomes trapped. The mold often goes unnoticed because it's not visible from the outside.

Squeeze all the water out of the toy at the end of bath time. My parents would make us kids do this ourselves to instill "clean up time" and "taking care of your shit," and then they would do an extra, just-in-case squeeze with grownup dexterity on anything they though we might not be able to squeeze effectively. If needed, give the toy a good whack up-and-down to encourage water from the extremities to move toward the hole.

If a toy can be disassembled, do that at the end of every bath.

Any cloth or foam toys should be hung up to dry so that air can circulate around all sides.

Large toys (like a water-safe baby doll) should be oriented with the hole facing down to let water drip out.

Try to have the toys live somewhere well-ventilated in-between baths (mesh bag, open basket with holes, etc.).

Check toys every so often for mold. Give them a good sniff and hold them up to a bright light. If they smell weird or have any dark patches that can't be accounted for by the toy's inherent design, they are probably moldy and should be thrown away.

Beware of prime suspects: Toys with odd or angular shapes, large toys with too-small holes or just 1 hole, toys with rubber or plastic that is so stiff an adult cannot easily squeeze it.

Give your kids cups, bowls, colanders/sieves, and ladles in the bath. This doesn't really stop mold, but it lets them practice drinking and fine motor skills without too much mess, uses stuff you already have, and may distract them from slurping out of the tub toys. Yes, it's fine if they drink a little tub water.

I know people will say their kid will be heartbroken if they have to toss a beloved-but-moldy toy. Bearing in mind that I'm not a child development expert, I would say it can be an opportunity to explore the concepts of change, loss, coping with undesirable situations, and caring for the health, safety, and cleanliness of ourselves and those around us in a low-stakes way. I absolutely remember a few tub toys having to go, and while I was sad, I was not traumatized by it in the least.

Try framing it as "[Toy] is moldy and icky inside. It is not the kind of icky we can clean. If we keep using [toy], it can make us sick, so the best choice we can make is to say goodbye to [toy.]" Maybe give them a day to say goodbye/grieve, thank the toy for all the good times, etc., before it goes in the trash (preferably in a bin the kids can't access).