Maybe A Sunflower. Or not.

There are a ton of quick and cheap electrolyte drink recipes that you can find online. Tea, coffee, cocount water, milk, milk substitutes, juice, etc are all hydrating despite extremely persistent myths. Many fruits and veggies like cucumbers, watermelon, strawberries, bell peppers, etc have high water content and are a great way to hydrate while also getting vital nutrients. Popsicles are also a good way to stay cool and hydrated and you can buy them or make your own with whatever ingredients you want; there are recipes online, including ones for electrolyte popsicles, but you can also just do basic ones with your choice of fruit juice and whatever you want to add, like chunks of fresh or frozen fruit.

When you are experiencing extreme heat, your body is working overtime trying to keep you cool. You are using up all your nutrients and energy faster in addition to losing electrolytes as you sweat. You need extra water, extra electrolytes, extra sugar (your body converts sugar into energy and boy is it burning through it's energy reserves rn), and extra nutrients like vitamins/minerals.

-- The reason tea and coffee are said to not be hydrating is because caffeine is a diuretic, which means it makes you pee. It is a myth that they are not hydrating because they really do have plenty of water content, but also you should be mindful of how much caffeine you're drinking. Consider decaf/caffeine-free options for your additional cups beyond your usual amounts so that you are not having to pee too frequently.

-- I have never heard that milks, coconut water, or juice are not hydrating, thank goodness. They very much are. In fact, they all have water AND other sugars/nutrients that you need. Drink them.

-- "Watery" fruits/veggies are extremely helpful during extreme heat. They really do have water AND other nutrients that your body needs. All the ones mentioned above are great. I particularly like melons (watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew, etc.) for their water + sugar content. Another thing I do is freeze grapes. I portion them out into separate containers, then grab one to let it mostly un-freeze before eating. This was great to take in my lunches to school as they were the right level of unfrozen right at my lunchtime. Just don't let them completely unfreeze or else they get mushy.

-- Electrolyte drinks, like Gatorade, Pedialyte, or salt packets (LMNT, Saalt, BioSteel, etc.) are extremely important. As said, you need to replace your electrolytes. You should absolutely be drinking these AND plain water/other hydration sources. Please.

-- Popsicles are also an excellent way to get some more water/sugar while cooling off. If you don't have a popsicle stand/kit to make your own, you can make ice cube versions; pour your juice/liquid of choice into an ice tray and then put in any fruit or inclusions if desired.

Other tips to cool down:

wet a towel or cloth with cold water and then place over your forehead and/or across the back of your neck.

swipe a cool, wet cloth over your body and then let your skin air dry (it's the same physics as sweating but loosing less of your own water/electrolytes from it)

remember that hot air rises; while inside, spend as much time as possible as close to the ground as possible. It's often not much, but any little bit helps

be intentional about moving as little as possible-- bring entertainment, snacks, and hydration to wherever you're going to sit/lay and then stay there as long as possible. Conserve your energy.

A male human and a female human are roughly the same size and same coloration.

Meanwhile, male black widow spiders are brown and a tenth the size of females. Anglerfish females are a full foot long and have a bioluminescent protrusion on their heads; males are barely half an inch long with no bioluminescence or protrusions. Male elephant seals are ten times bigger than females and have massive snouts. Male orangutans have big jowls and neck sacs that look like goiters, while females look more like other apes. Peacocks have flashy coloration and a long tail that they can display. The females are brown and simple.

Lowland Gorilla males tend to be 2.38x on average the mass of Lowland Gorilla females. Humans? That ratio is something line 1.15.

Male gorilla canines tend to be about 2 inches long, easily twice the length of some of their other teeth. Male humans have canines the exact same length as human female canines and the exact same length as the rest of our teeth.

He asked: "Oh, was she the only son or something before *waves hand*?" and I was like, warily, no she has two brothers. And he responded with a great deal of confusion: "Then what's their problem?!?!"

When he found and married my mom, he was nearly 45 and they had so much trouble conceiving that he went to a Guanyin temple supposedly "magical" for praying for children. When I was born (not a son, also an only child until now), my mom said, "when you prayed at the temple did you ask for a son?" He said, "Aiya, everyone is asking for sons, so I said any gender is okay. If I asked for a son, maybe we wouldn't have gotten a child because Guanyin's son quota is already used up. Do you want that to happen?" My mom laughed for days about "son quota" and continues to tell people about it today, but her honest answer was: "Any child is okay."

Jokes on them. They didn't specify a gender, so Guanyin Ma gave them a non-binary child!

More seriously: my dad doesn't care about sons. When I told my parents that I wouldn't marry or have children, I thought he might be disappointed, but he wasn't. Then again, maybe I should have expected that, given he tried to become a monk at 18 🤪 I think he said the thing about sons to poke fun at people who care too much about sons because he frankly thinks it's all a bit ridiculous. In his eyes, a child is a child, so what's the point in caring about gender? If the child "changes" gender, does it make a difference?

talk to your coworkers about this. remember that the "taking advice from everyone except the experts" thing cuts both ways. you can be the non-expert guy at work who isnt an expert and gives someone advice they decide to follow based on vibes, but your advice can be the right advice instead. this is something we can all do.