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Shell Sugar Bowl by Tavares 1922

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guerrillatech

kedreeva

if you, like me, are hesitant to enjoy what kinda sounds like "relaxes food standards" on the surface, I'm happy to report that this isn't "everyone can do what they want with your food supply without oversight" but rather a case where in NYC you had to have a permit to sell food and a second, superfluous permit to sell frozen desserts. This action simply removes the need for the second permit, rolling it into the first permit in order to help small businesses. Yay!

cuprohastes

The News: Republicans have signed an order making it illegal to wear glasses. Tesla wants to monetise air, and water now makes you bleed out. Meanwhile in New york, horrible dirty communist villain Mamdani is making icecream easier to buy. We ask a Nazi with lactose intolerance their opinion…

thestuffedalligator

I used to think “soupçon” was a French word for crouton and I used it as the French word for crouton for a long time and nobody stopped me.

Soupçon actually means “suspicion” and the reason nobody called me out on this is because I would use the word to imply the idea of something sprinkled on top of something else ala croutons. If someone said, “A soupçon of homoeroticism,” I thought it meant “Someone sprinkled homoeroticism on this story like croutons on a delightful Caesar salad.”

I wrote multiple essays that used soupçon as a noun with this translation in mind and I got a degree and this haunts me.

There’s no point to this post, it’s just very important to me that you know that I can be quite stupid

celtib

this post is how i learned that a soupçon is in fact not an archaic and tiny unit of measurement. like a dram or a jigger or a roquille. i thought it just meant a spoonful of something. just enough to accent it. if that makes you feel any better.

othernaut

Fuck it, full poem time.

Fear thou the wizard with easel and brush,

And fear thou the druid with hand-stuffed plush,

Fear the enchanter's well-studied philosophy

And the summoner accomplished linguistically,

Fear the warlock that cooks and the bookbinder witch

And the necromancer so deft with their bone-needle stitch,

And the hierophant muse who knows what words to use

To get heavenly angels to hie to their pitch.

Fear the warrior-poet and the warrior-lord

And the warrior-baker and the fisher-of-war,

Fear what bright cavalier rides afore the front line

And their well-tended herds of fat, happy swine,

Fear the black-velvet thief with their soft, silent feet

And their row upon row of ripening wheat,

Fear the bard-engineer, fear barbarian lord

Who built their own longship to sail their own sea.

Fear the cruel inspiration that comes just before sleep

That links knitwork and spellwork, spywork and sheep,

That paints the bright runes with a toymaker's eye

And churns poems most sweet into curses most vile,

For there is no greater gifts for Eureka to bring

Than to journeyman jack at a medley of things,

So fear thou the hard worker, but fear those at play,

For they'll be more tomorrow than they are today.

headspace-hotel

working on some writing about Bucky exploring his medical fears

headspace-hotel

haven't decided yet if this guy is a regular trauma-informed care practitioner, or if he specializes in helping people who were experimented on in evil labs

headspace-hotel

@moss-monger that decides it, we're getting a former living weapon/lab whumpee specialist

luminousguardian

Read "ssw" as "saw" and I cannot accurately describe the several worlds that flashed into my mind about death trap/death game industries and the people who take care of the survivors.

headspace-hotel

Yet another writing prompt reveals itself

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captain-price-returns

oh no they’re going to start calling democrats the same thing they’ve been calling democrats for 20 years now

hotvampireadjacent

thewellofastarael

"Here’s a trick I learned during the Obama presidency for handling certain types of political labels. Take, as an example, the Tea Party claim that Obama is a Communist. Don’t take the word of the person making the claim (Tea Partiers). Don’t rely on the rebuttal of the target (Obama), because that will just be dismissed. Go to the group itself (Communists) and ask them. Ask an actual Communist if Obama is a comrade and see how they answer. Watch as they laugh at you, then explain in great detail how they wish there was a Communist in the White House, but here’s a long and exhaustive list of why that just isn’t so. Now apply this logic to the claim that Hillary is pretty much the same as a Republican. Ask an actual Republican if they think Hillary Clinton is one of them. Watch them laugh, and then explain in the same exhausting detail why that just isn’t so. Some of them might concede that she’s better than Trump, but that’s not the same thing. Finally, go ask a White Supremacist if Trump is one of them. As they excitedly explain how Trump is the guy they’ve been waiting for all these years, and how he’s really empowered their movement, use this to guide how you will be voting in November."

Source: a 2016 facebook posts by Craig Enan, since then deleted (OG link here)

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

say something nice and scary to me

othernaut

The human body does not take as long to decompose as we tend to think it does. Active decay, the bits with all the soft tissues that make you you, takes under a year, while in soil conditions, skeletal decay takes... a decade? Decade and a half. The bones we see in ossuaries from centuries past are like that because the crypt conditions would keep anything preserved for that long.

For most people, and likely for me and you, we've already outlived the lifespan of our corpse. Our bodies have more time to spend living, dancing, eating, breathing, and dreaming than they will ever have decaying.

rainbow-demoness

This also means that, in the event of an undead uprising, we'd have them outnumbered. Zombies that work by disease can work, but no necromancer is taking over the world unless each skeleton can outfight several people (and another post already pointed out an adult skeleton is like, 30 pounds, while we are skeletons wearing power armor).

othernaut

Which is why I dig the confluence of necromancy and, like, crafting. A skeletal manservant probably can't just be a "cast a spell, there you go" situation. Connective tissue, for one. The mummified remnants of a desiccated corpse don't have near the elasticity and resilience to even walk, and there's really just this brief lacuna between "desiccated corpse" and "loose bones".

But a crafter! A necromancer that can carefully strip and tan your skin, make the resulting leather as soft and stretchable as possible. A necromancer that can braid your ligaments back together with your own flesh - better, maybe, with more range of motion than you formerly enjoyed. Who knows what material to fill your hollow bones with so that you still have weight enough to stand. Days of work, weeks of it, meticulous and fine. The spell scrimshawed into your skull, lacquered in place. A death-mask beaten into the shape your face is remembered, a you you might have been.

Meanwhile some of the cooler depiction of zombies I've seen have been, like, of the infection as being like a second, evil nervous system that grows on top of your own. Still gonna decay quickly, but it's fun that it's there.

moldspace

weird vases

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

say something nice and scary to me

othernaut

The human body does not take as long to decompose as we tend to think it does. Active decay, the bits with all the soft tissues that make you you, takes under a year, while in soil conditions, skeletal decay takes... a decade? Decade and a half. The bones we see in ossuaries from centuries past are like that because the crypt conditions would keep anything preserved for that long.

For most people, and likely for me and you, we've already outlived the lifespan of our corpse. Our bodies have more time to spend living, dancing, eating, breathing, and dreaming than they will ever have decaying.

rainbow-demoness

This also means that, in the event of an undead uprising, we'd have them outnumbered. Zombies that work by disease can work, but no necromancer is taking over the world unless each skeleton can outfight several people (and another post already pointed out an adult skeleton is like, 30 pounds, while we are skeletons wearing power armor).

captain-price-returns

oh no they’re going to start calling democrats the same thing they’ve been calling democrats for 20 years now

hotvampireadjacent

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camblogarchive

nature documentary but the narration is just weird enough to make you question it

camblogarchive

“Some fish can walk out of water, so remember that next time.”

camblogarchive

“You might think you’re safe, but horses are omnivores”

toxicglooo

please watch the round planet on netflix it’s exactly like that

red-garden

MAGA boomers SHOCKED by 20y/o commie speaking fluent hog

red-garden

Hog 201 for anyone interested in trying this:

Bodily autonomy (like abortion, anti draft, etc) -> “The government shouldn’t be able to force anything on my body I don’t want.”

Anti surveillance -> “I don’t trust big government/big tech (big brother if you’re feeling frisky) with the ability to spy on me and my family.”

Immigration -> “Next to all of us immigrated at some point, I don’t see why the elites get to decide who’s allowed to be where. What’s to stop them coming for me?”

Climate Change -> “Big oil shouldn’t get to determine whether or not I get to go places. I don’t want to be dependent on some big business to survive.”

State Violence -> “I don’t want the goddamn secret police breathing down my neck! I trust my community a whole hell of a lot more to help me than I do the state!”

The vast majority of conservatives think of themselves as underdogs being repressed by the government/the elite, and they value personal freedom (specifically their personal freedom, they don’t care about other people). The will almost always agree with leftist points if you can find a way to blame the problem on their vague enemies (useful, since rich people are the root of most problems), and tie it back to their ability to say fuck everyone else. NEVER appeal to science, theory, logic, or human goodness. Make it seem as if you are a paranoid lunatic who trusts no one. They love it.

dinosaurjam

#you need to tailor your arguments to people's existing values and priorities if you want to convince them #the flip side is that it's every bit as easy to tailor conservative arguments to convince a leftist audience #so don't get smug #you're not immune to this either <- prev extremely true

blumineck

This is… not a good idea.

(Also if anyone suggests a rapier they legally have to watch the video again until you understand why that wouldn’t work)

sabertoothwalrus

it’s 2026 so we can stop referring to bras solely by their cup size, right? everyone knows that cup sizes change depending on the band size right and thus are meaningless when mentioned on their own, right? that a 38B has a larger boob volume than a 32D, right? that “D cups” are actually pretty small in the grand scheme of things, right??? that the number on a bra size is your ribcage measurement in inches so if someone wears a size medium it’s impossible for them to have a band size over 36, right?????????? right???????????

sabertoothwalrus

please learn this

beemovieerotica

most braindead fanbase on planet earth lmao

knight-of-ashes

So the UK will reroute a fucking Internet cable for a fake grave for a fake elf because a bunch of brain dead nerds through a pissy fit, and meanwhile real actual natives in the US are getting arrested for trying to keep oil sand pipelines from going through their actual graves, holy sites and unceded territory. Burn it all down.

beemovieerotica

oh it's worse, it's not an internet cable, it's a cable for distributing cleanly generated solar/wind electricity

pocket-deer-belly

this grave has a real life physical location and YOU 🫵 can destroy it

loth-caatgirl

they'll drive a highway through Stonehenge, but this fictional character is sacrosanct don't you get it?!

anyway, this grave has a real life physical location and YOU 🫵 can destroy it

zwoelffarben

The one and only blank-cheque indulgence which earns you guilt-free enjoyment harry potter is still available.

While this 'grave' has a real life physical location and YOU 🫵 can destroy it, be aware that doing so is merely based. It will not earn you guilt-free enjoyment of harry potter.

#could you spell it out for those of us who catch slower #(like me)#what is blank check for guiltfree harry potter enjoyment #not that i want to but i feel weird with not getting able to guess from the post alone

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sabertoothwalrus

I’m so proud of senshi for making it so far in the tumblr sexyman poll. I think it’s so beautiful that tumblr has reached a point where a short fat hairy bearded man is the pinnacle of sexuality for a large swath of this userbase. it’s like when you see before & after pictures of a rainforest recovering from deforestation. nature is healing and we can fight god

sabertoothwalrus

I hope he wins so someone will have to explain to ryoko kui what a tumblr sexyman is

ailithnight

sabertoothwalrus

I have to say I forgot the onceler’s thing was cutting down trees when I made my metaphor.

charlesoberonn

Seeing the image before reading the text, I thought this was about taking HRT.

butch-king-frankenstein

I think those fancomics where Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes is transgender are cute and fun but I also think it's a deep misunderstanding of Calvin's character to think he would transition into a heterosexual normie who goes to her high school reunion. That girl would have neopronouns and fang implants

butch-king-frankenstein

Adult Calvin is a tattoo artist named Panthera who is the bassist in a terrible metal band called Captain Napalm and Hobbes helps do faer E injections

butch-king-frankenstein

I know it's like 2 weeks too late to change it but I'm so mad I didn't realize that the band would obviously be called "Get Rid Of Slimy GirlS". I walk the road of shame

parawyrm

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