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@dontmesswiththefae

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these restrictions are really getting out of hand. Every single invention i've submitted to the mad scientist symposium this year has been denied on the grounds it 'could be used for fetish material'! What the fuck man! A shrink ray and a mind control helmet are like the most foundational mad scientist devices and now I'm not allowed to submit them to the symposium on the off chance someone is turned on by them? Whats next? Banning strapping your rival to a table and threatening them with a big laser? Banning the glowing green mystery chemical that turns you into a big monster? Soon they're gonna be banning lab coats and shiny black gloves!
that subversive part of dishwashing where your dishes start washing you
The last play I watched before the pandemic was a Beauty And The Beast adaptation and when Gaston proposed to Belle there was this little boy in the audience who yelled NOOO DONāT SAY YES, so when Belle naturally turned him down Gaston turned to the boy with his hands on his hips and saidĀ āwell, now look what youāve doneāĀ Ā
#no one breaks the fourth wall like gaston

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@moethh don't hide this in the tags
of course, like anybody else would, the first thing i did upon getting my time machine was go back in time and kill hitler when he was just a child. but when i came back a cursory google search revealed that there was some other charismatic guy called jan krupp who staged a coup and took control of germany leading to ww2. so naturally i went back in time and killed him before he could grow up and commit genocide. but i soon discovered that he'd been replaced by another guy. so i continued on this path of killing and tbh i'm not sure how many german babies i've killed at this point and it's a little hard to find old german newspaper clippings from the ww2 period anymore because they underwent a population collapse around the turn of the 20th century. best i can tell it's this weird german serial killer they called "jack-of-the-cradle" who kept killing newborns. but googling "world war 2" doesn't come up with any results so really i think all i need to do is stop this jack guy and then that'll be mission accomplished
The eye doctor is the most fun doctor you can go to. They never steal your blood. They never make you get naked and put on a paper dress. They're just like, "Can you see these letters? It's fine if you can't, we can fix that." And they don't even spell anything.
one day, i hope to be moved from your downloads folder into somewhere more deliberate
Livin la penis smoka

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watching the documentary on the OceanGate Titan disaster and it's striking how Stockton Rush wanted to emulate Elon Musk and in many ways he did, identifying weight as the core constraint of submarine operations (lifting and hauling the sub around as being the primary expense) and basing the entire concept around making it as light as possible, but then he overrode every engineer who told him in explicit terms that it was going to pancake, and it pancaked.
also quite reminiscent of Richard Branson's space experiments, which did at least have Burt Rutan as a designer, but the same breed of dickhead CEO at the head.
goddamn the Titan had acoustic monitoring sensors and you can literally hear the carbon fiber in the hull cracking louder and louder as they descend on test dives, but the CEO was angry that they were even bothering to monitor it and refused to accept that it was dangerous, and he wasn't just risking other people, he was on the damn thing himself! he was just that deep in denial and unwilling to accept reality.
DISCLAIMER: intense yap session from someone PUTTING THINGS INTO LAYMENāS TERMS to make it easier for everyone to understand šāāļø
As someone whoās Obsessedā¢ļø with this tragically yet sadly predictable story, weād like to take a moment and yap about how crazy insane the Real Time Acoustic Monitoring System for Carbon Fiber for a DEEP SEA PRESSURE VEHICLE is.
First of all. The fact that Stockton Rush decided to make a DEEP SEA PRESSURE VESSEL out of carbon fiber, a material that is famous for its tensile (pulling) strength NOT pressure (push). Pressure. Which is very much in the DEEP SEA. Where the VEHICLE is going (if we remember correctly, the pressure in the ocean increases by 10 atmospheres of pressure- ie 1 atmosphere of pressure being what the atmospheric pressure is at sea level -for every 10 meters you descend. Space, on the other hand, is between 1 and 0 atmospheres of pressure). The ocean wants to squish you into biological paste so, so, so, so, so very badly.
Everyone and their mother are telling Stockton Rush that using carbon fiber is a Shitass Bad Idea. Not only does logically it make no sense to use (again, good with PULLING not BEING PUSHED, which is what pressure is) but it just hasnāt been tested the way other materials, such as titanium, have been. We know what the failure point of titanium is. We know when Catastrophic Failure happens in titanium. We know how many cycles of fatigue/stress titanium can withstand before Catastrophic Failure happens. When know how titanium behaves Before That Happens.
Carbon fiber?? We donāt know those things about carbon fiber, when it comes to DEEP SEA PRESSURE FATIGUE/STRESS. Itās a material used for PULLING not PUSHING. So it hasnāt even been tested for DEEP SEA PRESSURE. Because itās not meant for deep sea pressure. And weāre about to show you how very Not meant for DEEP SEA PRESSURE that carbon fiber is.
Hereās a generic chat that gives you an idea of what we mean when we say Titanium Is Predictable. This chart isnāt about titanium specifically, but we can pretend it is. You can look at the colors and understand what the chart is telling you. We can see the curve and whatās a Warning and whatās Bad. The red is Bad. You donāt want to be in the red. The curve of the chart shows that you have time to predict the red before it goes to red.
Hereās an actual chart of titanium under stress, along with a steel and aluminum. Ough wow!! Look at those curves!! You donāt have to know exactly what youāre looking at to see and understand that the curves happen before the lines āflatlineā. Thereās a predictability before the lines of the chart āgo flatā. This means you can understand the integrity of the titanium youāre using, and whether or not itās safe to use, whether it can be worked on, or if it needs to be retired altogether.
Now letās look at carbon fiber.
Thereās no curve. Carbon fibers works, until suddenly it doesnāt. Thereās no prediction for catastrophic failure- it just happens.
AND STOCKTON RUSH IS USING THIS MATERIAL IN AN APPLICATION IT SPECIFICALLY DOESNT WORK WITH (pushing- NOT pulling).
Well. The thing about Stockton Rush is that heās going to Do What He Wants. So heās going to build his vessel out of expired carbon fiber. Because itās cheaper to transport and manufacture (remember, he planned on having a whole fleet of these things). He wanted to spend as little money as possible while making back as much profit as possible.
And Stockton Rush, with his background in aviation (imagine. for a moment. if a NASCAR driver decided to make a commercial airplane, and only used his knowledge of racing cars to do it. because thatās essentially whatās happening here) decided to use a Real Time Acoustic Monitoring System. Because carbon fiber is made up is a bunch of threads of carbon ābraidedā (for lack of better term) together, when the UNPREDICTABLE- WE ALL SEE THAT CHART. WHERES THE CURVE RUSH- catastrophic failure happens, the threads āsnapā apart as they break. So his thinking process is, the Real Time Acoustic Monitoring System would be able to āpredictā when the carbon fiber was going to fail catastrophically.
For shits and giggles, hereās applications acoustic monitoring systems are used for:
Please note that DEEP SEA PRESSURE VEHICLES are not on there. Damn near the rest of this IS in planes, however.
And. Cāmon. COME ON!!!!! LOOK at that chart!!!! Does it look like predicting the catastrophic failure of the carbon fiber is even going to matter?!? WHEN YOURE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE GOD DAMNED OCEAN?!? Catastrophic failure at the depths the Titanic is at means IMPLOSION. The Real Time Monitoring System is a fart in the wind. Itās Safety Theater (<- you will hear that a LOT when you watch documentaries and the investigation).
Except.
⨠EXCEPT āØ
It actually fucking worked.
The Real Time Monitoring System actually DID work and actually DID predict the catastrophic failure of the carbon fiber before the catastrophic failure even happened.
And this is HUGE.
This is GROUND BREAKING.
This is the INNOVATION that Stockton Rush has had a hard on for since day one.
Except theyāre loosing money. And as OP said, Stockton Rush was upset that the carbon fiber had the audacity to snap, crackle and pop at all.
He was so mad in fact that, as we found out during the US Coast Guardsā investigation, Stockton specifically had the graphs plotted for each dive in such a way so that the RTMSā alert to the carbon fiberās lack of structural integrity wasnāt readily obvious (instead of the graph showing the curves of stress fatigue, they were plotted to show depth with time).
Anyways. The fact that his crack pipe idea of using an acoustic monitoring system to predict a famously unpredictable material in an application itās very much NOT used for and it actually WORKED is phenomenal. Unfortunately, Stockton Rush didnāt set out to find a way to make carbon fiber a viable material for deep sea pressure vessels, he set out to be ābig swinging dickā like Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos. So he didnāt care, and how heās dead because of his own hubris.
@voidofteeth our Boat Explodey buddy š„«š„
thank you for writing this in old school tumblr ābuckle up fuckos and learn you a thingā diction, it is indeed incredible that the man invented a clever warning system that accurately told him his idea sucked and then ignored it, scroll of truth style
They wear suits, but they don't even know basic etiquette.
inspired by @cowardsexual 's post of a very sleepy phm science team and Grace's teacher instincts
I dropped a shit load of acid at a bernie rally in like 2016 and at one point he mentions trump so everyone boos, and I forget about the rally and im like Wtf is that noise? So I turn around and just see a gigantic crowd of people booing me
happy pride to the gay people in my computer <3

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Dogsitter just casually sent me this photo as if it isnt the most insane thing ive ever seen in my fucking life
finding somebody who will laugh at your shitty jokes is joy-inducing but finding a motherfucker who can yes-and all the esoteric bullshit you put out is pure cocaine. this must be the shit all those racuous but good-natured scoundrels down at the tavern are on