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@coranam

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welcome to my farm where I keep my dark horse my black sheep my scapegoat and my underdog. my canary in the coal mine died ages ago
It’s a mess here: someone looked your gift dark horse in the mouth, led it to water, and jumped back on it. Your ducks aren’t in a row, someone counted the chickens before they hatched. Your geese are silly, your brown cows aren’t explaining how, and every one of these sheep is a wolf but they don’t even notice with the amount of wool over their eyes. I’m fining you one million gold coins.
it was the goat blame the goat
If you guys don't start behaving I'm going to turn off reblogs for this post. This post is about launching matchbox cars into your wall at high enough speeds to lodge them there. Nobody cares about how strong the walls in your house are, and I'm suddenly learning that a lot of people on this webbed site don't know what drywall is, but none of that matters.
The only thing that matters is shoot cars into your wall.
ladies… has anyone ever told you it’s okay to be feminine 🩷 i’m sure no one has ever ever ever reinforced this deeply held secret, that’s it’s okay for you to be feminine. 🩷 i know the world totally tries to tell you that you have to be manly and masculine and grow your body hair and eat as much as you want and get strong and stand up for yourself and make waves and take up space and show your bare face and show your anger. but it’s okay to do the exact opposite actually. 🩷 it’s okay to shrink yourself down to the exact same mold every other woman is expected to conform to. 🩷 did you know that it’s okay to be feminine. 🩷 did you know it’s okay to be feminine. 🩷 did you know it’s okay to be feminine. 🩷 has anyone ever told you it’s okay to be feminine. 🩷 will you be feminine. 🩷 will you be feminine. 🩷 will you be feminine. 🩷 will you just be feminine already. 🩷🩷🩷
it’s so hard for me to listen to heartbroken/angry breakup songs by straight men bc no matter how good the song is i’ll be like i’m not sure if i fully believe you. let’s hear her side of the story.

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prev dont leave this in the tags
Literally the definition of imperialism and classism. Doesn’t matter how many peasants you sacrifice as long as the most powerful piece is left standing
Proximity of bishops to the rulers promotes theocratic oppression
the horse is so fuckable
and you know what? Maybe I do tag my “blorbos” in a lot of random people’s unrelated posts but I’ve never tagged a man in a post about a woman. Which is why unlike a lot of other people I’m still going to heaven
Source
when gillian flynn said “I’ve grown quite weary of the spunky heroines, brave rape victims, soul-searching fashionistas that stock so many books. I particularly mourn the lack of female villains — good, potent female villains. Not ill-tempered women who scheme about landing good men and better shoes (as if we had nothing more interesting to war over), not chilly WASP mothers (emotionally distant isn’t necessarily evil), not soapy vixens (merely bitchy doesn’t qualify either). I’m talking violent, wicked women. Scary women. Don’t tell me you don’t know some. The point is, women have spent so many years girl-powering ourselves — to the point of almost parodic encouragement — we’ve left no room to acknowledge our dark side. Dark sides are important. They should be nurtured like nasty black orchids.”

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bringing this over from twitter bc this person literally gets it. watching su for the first time i was literally shocked by how wonderfully toxic the yuri was there. thank you women 🙏
THANK YOU WOMEN. god bles
Hyperbonkers Toxically Yuri basically drives the entire show. Pearl/Rose is 60% of Steven's Issues; the first big event episode climaxes with a paean to the power of nontoxic yuri but then ends with other characters EXTREMELY MISSING THE POINT to the point they emit nightmares; there's a whole arc about Pearl repeatedly tricking her friends into a threesome; the movie is the vengeance of a dumped manic pixie clowngirl; and the Diamonds (WD in particular) definitely have some kind of oneesama shit going on.
Pearl/Rose is enough toxic yuri (I will create a new identity for you! I will compel you to keep our secret forever! I will fuck around on you but don't worry I'll always come back to you until haha I kill myself and leave you the baby to raise!!!!!!!!!) for six shows. But it's not a show about emotionally healthy people doing healthy things! Steven repeatedly tries to kill himself!
I also want to point out the het stuff is similarly deranged. Lars/Sophie is "what if the chubby girl fixated on the bad boy who impliedly fucks her on the sly (!!!!!) but is embarrassed to be seen with her and got so frustrated she made a big-deal punk band about it (so she's completely over him when he gets a glow up to UNDEAD CAPTAIN HARLOCK(!!!))" Greg breaks up a 5000 year toxic Yuri situationship by being the scrungliest hair metal guy in history. Steven gets a somewhat-requited crush and Pearl immediately projects her "what if I was a knight and I was willing to put my life on the line for you and it was kind of sexual" deal on to them so hard she creates a child soldier. Then Steven, to prove he's NOT his mom, tries to die for her without letting her die with him and she's so mad about not being allowed to die with him they break up for a bit.
Frankly the sheer density of characters eager to die for each other is somewhat alarming.
all of this of course forgetting the one "Stable" relationship is two small lesbians who are so attached at the hip they literally fused into one person, and have their own princess/knight dynamic [wow the diamonds sure love that one, wonder what thats about] and any time they have a MINOR disagreement about a major problem they usually cope by literally exploding apart, doing a shit ton of property damage, and then tearfully fusing right back together again, which is gorgeously juxtaposed by the fact that they can literally see the branching timelines of the future and so can TELL that there is literally no reality where this doesnt happen if they're fucking paying attention. which they usually arent. because they're too busy focusing on keeping steven alive
#ah gee I sure do wonder why SU got a reputation for being ‘tenderqueer television’ and people never gave it a chance#despite it now having a reputation for being groundbreaking toxic yuri that paved the way for other queer media#surely it has nothing to do with Rebecca Sugar being nonbinary and nothing else
genuinely crying laughing
NBA twitter is something else man you gotta love it
[Image descriptions in order: a series of tweets, which say:
@/easymone... "Black Leon Kennedy🇩🇴": If trump not dead don't interrupt my sports to tell me shit. Even if he is dead don't interrupt it i don't care.
@/nikotaughtyou "Niko" (blue checkmark): They done cut the game talking bout some Trump, BOY CUT MY FUCKING GAME BACK ON LMAOOOO
@/NAWZ_REID "Happy Jaden😐" (Parody account): I don't care if there's a nuclear warhead aimed at my moms house turn the wolves game back on
@/DedicationHoops "jeff": we do NOT care put wolves nuggets back on
@/grace_eliz1 "grace": you're really gonna interrupt my game and he didn't even die are you kidding]
[A screenshot of a twitter post with a series of reply tweets, which says:
@/BallsackSports "Ballsack Sports" (blue checkmark): One of the darkest nights for our country, man. Just gotta pray.
You never want to see a guy like Anthony Edwards go down. I feel sick.
@/mldiffley "Matt✈️" (blue checkmark): Why don't you mention the other thing?
There was an assassination attempt earlier today by Lu Dort on Devin Booker and it's disgusting how he's still allowed in the league.
@/OgElias31 "Elias and 48 others": Are you serious right now? There's something far more sinister that's happening now
Donte divincenzo is out with an Achilles tendon tear
@/Ichigosolostol "4K Triston": Seriously what is wrong with people??? Desmond bane tweaked his hamstring and yak acting like nothing happened smh]
big fan of whatever the youth is doing to torment scientology buildings
they couldnt take the heat
the cool thing about sports is that none of it is real except the blinding rage you experience while watching them
My bf has been naughty and I need some new ways to punish him. Tying him up and fucking the shit out of him doesn’t work. I need new ideas. Help!
shoot him

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I never thought I would be siding with the pope’s involvement in politics and cheering him on. I will say that.
homestuck day observed
*tired disgruntled middle aged mom voice* okay everyone gather around the kringlefucker and let's get this over with
the kringlewhat
This thing