Neurotic and Chaotic

desired you while the women flee

>go right

>go left instead (looks nice and fun!)

>…go back to the right

Go left

Go forward

> Ascend

Go right ->

I love being a LESBIAN I love being a DYKE I love being horny for BUTCHES

aren't gorillas gentle giants or something. i stay out of his way, he doesn't maul me, we have a nice time picking out clothes together in opposite sides of the mall

Male gorillas are super aggressive and territorial. Also they interpret nearly every human mannerism as a sign of aggression or a challenge. Smiling and eye contact are both things that zookeepers have to be taught to suppress when they’re in the vicinity of gorillas.

This is all irrelevant because the obvious answer is five black mambas. I mean, that’s not actually very many snakes, and malls are fucking huge. And unlike a gorilla you can definitely outrun a snake if it does show up. Find an open space in the mall where you can see any snake coming and just hangout out there. Fucking easy.

They should substitute "chimpanzee" for "gorilla" in this hypothetical.

if it was a chimp i'm taking the fucking snakes

Black mambas have a reputation build on being very venomous and very fast. I'm not sure why you would think you could outrun one (or five) in an enclosed space like a mall.

Malls usually have pretty slick floors, and escalators. I’d choose the gorilla simply because I think that would make an more interesting story (and a better-selling autobiography, I Survived the Mall Gorilla) but I think I’d stand a pretty good chance at avoiding the mamba. They’re fast and aggressive and will chase you but unless we started immediately beside each other I think my sneakers would have the terrain advantage over scutes.

fucking enamored with the implication that this gorilla is fully intelligent but is trying to manufacture plausible deniability like the movie barnyard

Please stop he is drowning…..

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

Then bring me luck

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

Hey Potato, cure my -ing cold so I can have a good time while away.

Here's the potato. Make what use of it you will. :)

i want potato luck. please???

the anniversary of library paste man’s death is in four days.

One hundred and ten years ago to the day. Amazing. Incredible.

RIP😔🙏📚🍯

just a heads up. im gonna do a big curse soon

okay so honestly i wasn’t expecting they’d be able to hide the body for this long

LINDSEY GRAHAM ?

cannibal chappell roan: you can put a hundred boys in jars

vehicular manslaughter chappell roan: you can hit a hundred boys with cars

medieval torturer chappell roan: you can coat a hundred boys in tar

Now that is some vintage sports goth

This ad is very ominous and threatening.

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