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Foreigners tend to assume that the big cultural confusions between Australians and most other countries are gonna be based on our food, or social services, or weather, or weird animals. But itâs never that. In my experience, the real cultural confusions re: Australians are about The Respect Thing almost one hundred per cent of the time.
? I realize im proving your point but what
The broader Australian culture doesnât, as a whole, have status-based respect. Some individual groups might, because theyâve brought it from other cultures theyâre involved in, but the general culture doesnât. Thereâs no sense that your boss or scout leader or the guy in charge of your country deserves more respect than you, or that you should behave differently to them than you would to any random person you know similarly well. (The very rare exceptions include ritualised settings, such as courtrooms, and for some reason the fact that children use âMiss/Ms/Mrâ honourifics for teachers at school.)Â
I donât mean Australians are a âstick it to the man, fight back against those in powerâ kind of people â weâre generally not. And I donât mean we have a âweâre going to do the status thing but pretend we donât and pretend to all be equal in mixed companyâ thing that middle-class Americans do. I mean the status-respect system does not exist, and if you try to use it, it weirds people the fuck out at best, and insults them at worst. Treating someone most countries would say is âaboveâ you differently in Australia is basically telling that person that you hate them; itâs saying âIâm forced to interact with you due to our current circumstances but I donât see you as a person and wonât grant you the basic respect of treating you like an equalâ. (When I was in America, I was constantly suppressing the instinct that random service people were sassing me because they overuse honourifics and were so keen to help me.)
This makes interacting with foreigners really baffling in a lot of circumstances. In university, my international friends would often describe Australians as âfriendly, but very rudeâ. They thought we were all arseholes because of the way we spoke to our PhD supervisors and soforth, and wouldnât believe us when we explained that our behaviour was respectful and that being deferential would be weird and awkward and insulting to them. Learning Japanese had a similar problem; everyone in the class could get the concept of different levels of formality and deference in language, ans was happy to memorise the usage of various words for Japanese people, but using them on each other was super weird, and weâd only ever use the most casual form of anything unless specifically instructed otherwise by the teacher.
The reason Iâve been thinking of this lately is because Iâve recently become aware that a lot of countries have like⌠a special respect for their countryâs leaders? I donât just mean âyeah, that guy makes the rulesâ, but that having that office makes them better than everyone else, somehow. Which I expect from countries with royal families, because Tradition, but Iâve recently found that Americans feel this way about their President, too. (Except the current one, who seems to be enough of a dick to break the system.) Like, if six Americans were in an aeroplane that was going down and there was only one parachute and one of the Americans was A Generic Non-Trump President, itâs just assumed that that guy gets the parachute? Like heâs automatically the life worth saving over the others, and theyâd just give up their chance in favour of him? And thatâs so weird to me. An Australian prime minister would have a 1 in 6 chance at the parachute; however the people decided, âthis guy happens to be the leader of the countryâ wouldnât be a factor.Â
When Americans donât like a President, they usually feel the need to work in how heâs ânot my presidentâ, either through sheer denial, or by finding some way heâs theoretically illegitimate (different ways votes are counted, wild conspiracy theories about birth country, etc.), and while making sure those rules are obeyed IS extremely important, Iâve recently noticed that part of the motivation seems to be that theyâre invested in whether heâs Really The President because being the President somehow makes someone Special rather than just a normal dick whoâs been put in charge of the group project. (You see the same thing in âTHIS IS TRUMPâS AMERICA!â, like him becoming President gives him superpowers or something).
This is getting off-topic. Point is, in Australia you can run into the Prime Minister and ask him to help you fix your phone and if heâs not busy but refused to help you out heâd be kind of a dick; of course he should help you out. And if I walk into your restaurant and you act like Iâm a movie star and youâre going to be super attentive to my every need because Iâm The Customer, Iâm gonna get creeped out. Weâre suspicious and insulted by what most people in the world consider to be basic manners, and vice versa. And it makes interacting with foreigners super weird because I always feel like theyâve got some invisible heirarchical flowchart in the back of their minds that I donât.
I have long noticed that Americans have absolutely the same cultural attitude to the President as they would to a serving monarchy. They just think they donât on a technicality.
Can confirm that if I call someone âSir/Madamâ I generally mean âassholeâ (unless talking to an animal or tiny child) and that if I get called Maâam I feel like Iâm being called the asshole, which made time in Atlanta, Georgia suoer weird.
Australians have a very good attitude to respect
âŚso this explains why I have spent the last fourteen years low-grade pissed off at nearly every Australian I meet, because every time I try to be American Polite at them it pisses them off. And, for that matter, why my second boss here, the one I was so careful to be Formally Respectful of and always called âsir,â took such an intense dislike to me.
Yeah, even if that boss understood that you were American and what that meant, their instincts wouldâve been screaming at them the whole time that you were being a dick. Itâs a difficult thing for us to get used to even when we know the culture is differentâ.
As a Brit visiting Australia, the most vivid experience I had of this is: in the UK itâs really uncool to get into the passenger seat of a cab - youâre expected to get in the back. In Australia the reverse was apparently true.
⌠I am only just now realising that inAmerican and British movies and stuff, people donât get in the passenger seat of a taxi.
covid update: youâre now meant to get in the back seat for social distancing and IT FEELS SO RUDE. sorry taxi person I AM NOT TRYING TO SHUN YOu just I know there are rules and weâre protecting each other. letâs be intensely awkward for a while.
Reblogging this because I just remembered the time Molly Meldrum absolutely horrified Prince Charles by describing meeting the Queen as âI saw your mum last weekâ.
One of my favorite travel books described humanity as, broadly speaking, having two types of culture: one where formal is respectful and informal is rude, and vice versa. Australian culture sees formality as hostile or unfriendly and familiarity as warmth. Itâs decidedly not the case in USA as a whole, though as with any broad category the dichotomy changes as the group gets smaller.
YOU PUT THE THING INTO WORDS!
Different cultures are fascinating.
Look thereâs honestly a lot of history that build our culture today to be like this. We never really had a true aristocracy or class system in Australia and was still considered the dirty colonies up until federation in 1901. Even when we had the gold rush in the 19th century there were rich people but also anyone could dig up a nugget and get rich so no one really bothered with the rich = better than you thing because old johnno down the road who normally is on the piss all day and lives in a swag just picked up a 2lb piece of gold thatâs worth thousands of dollars so now he can go buy his own pub and sell his own beer but everyone will still think of him as that guy who was always cracking bad jokes at the end of the bar and drinking a minimum of 8 beers a day. Sure we have rich people but we also pull them back down to earth when they get hoity toity. Australia is one of the most unionised countries in the world and yeah its true we dont get upset by much but when we do, all hell breaks loose. Look up some of Australiaâs biggest protests and union movements like the convict rebellions, Eureka stockade, the campaign for the 8 hour day, and he general history of our Australian Labor Party. Australia was the second country in the world to grant womenâs suffrage. So many unions and strikes and demands we made in Australia demanding equal and fair rights to working class in the 19th century that by federation in 1901 we were ahead of the world with workers rights and equality. Really the only class system we had was the employer employee divide but we still never bowed down and took it from them just because they boss. Iâm not going to go into what happened in the 20th century but if youâre interested definitely look up post war Australia, the womenâs working unions in the middle of the century, definitely look up the late Bob Hawke and his legacy, the nurseâs strike in Victoria in the 80s, the land rights movement and Eddie Mabo, and go from there.
I remember in school we were always taught to treat others how you wanted to be treated. You were no better or worse than anyone else. You want to be treated equal to everyone else and that meant being polite and showing decency and helping each other out. Itâs true we only use titles for teachers or elders (indigenous Australians use âAuntyâ and âUncleâ as a show of respect to their elders) but outside of that if someone calls you Miss y/n or sir or whatever itâs just uncomfortable. In hospitality and retail some of us will still use sir/ma'am mainly because we donât know customers names but even then thatâs rare and usually applied only to elderly. We personally donât want to be addressed by titles or even surnames (unless itâs a nickname which Iâll get to) so we donât use the titles or surnames for other people. With surnames often we use them as a nickname if we dont/canât shorten their names. Getting a nickname (a good one, not one that is intentionally meant to bully you ofc. E.g. ScoMo is the nickname for our PM but heâs a piece of shit and ScoMo sounds a lot like Scum-mo) is the biggest show of respect in Australia. Usually itâs simply just adding a vowel or changing it up a little. I.e. John = johnno, Darren = Dazza, etc. If we canât do it to your first name we do it to your last name. If we canât do it to your last name itâs either a feature or behaviour and we put it in a good light. You ever notice that Australians like to make fun of each other and âinsultâ each other? Thereâs a very subtle difference when itâs truly meant to be insulting but thatâs our way of being affectionate for each other. We will point out your flaws and make fun of you (and stop if you say no) and we will give you a nickname and itâs all in good humour. Itâs one of the things I find foreigners get really upset about because they dont understand why we are so rude to each other. You build up a hard skin in this country and forget hat sometimes that stuff IS a bit insulting.
Itâs a very backwards system of respect but it is a very honest one. No one is better than you. No one is worse than you. We are all humans.
We treat our acquaintances like friends and our friends like family. Teasing your friends is expected the same way it is for siblings. If you act like someone is above you, in a not-joking way, thatâs basically declaring that you donât see them as potential friend materialâthat something about them repels you and you want as many barriers between you as possible.
It would hurt my dad so badly if I ever called him âsir.â
Yep, and the automatic assumption that you think Iâm an idiot/bitch if Iâm called ma'am. The only time it has ever happened and I havenât taken offence has been brand new army recruits/cadets, who are required to use it while in public to show deference to civilians.
I legit take less offense from being referred to as a pigdog cunt than I do being called ma'am. Getting a sweary character reference or having a friend call you a mad cbomb is totally fine in Aus. Ma'am is not something I associate with respect, being included as part of the group, or acceptance in any way - itâs pointing out rather emphatically that you are âotherâ
your world is dying. your husband presumably dies in space so now you're a widow and your world is still dying. then 50-ish years later your husband everyone assumed was dead pulls up in a random spaceship full of a highly volatile atmosphere with the solution to your impending apocalypse and none of the original crew from his mission and instead with a wet, blobby alien that he pack bonded with and almost died for and is now emotionally codependent on that now wont stop complaining about the temperature of the water in its enclosure. your name is adrian and you dont know how you got here
tags via @scp-69 because their tags are on point:
#INSANE STORY FROM ADRIANS PERSPECTIVE YES#just like . sending your mate off to space (first time anyone of your species has ever done this btw) and then not hearing from him#for years longer than expected. surely it cant take this long to work out whats happening. but nobody has ever been to space so what if#something went wrong.#whole planet slowly becomes resigned to the fact that theyre not coming back and theyre gonna slowly die on erid.#then suddenly some fuckass tiny ship made of cardboard (relative to xenonite) full of fire air and No returning crew only your mate and this#weirdo who speaks with sounds instead of tones????? but who can understand you? and your mate understands THEM?#literally what happened in space. your mate is obsessed with this alien they visit every single day. i guess we have a third now?????#(<- platonic codependent pack bonded third half of the eridian marriage ryland grace)#do you think eridians freaked out in that space elevator the first time hail mary came into radar. like what the FUCK is that#phm
You may think the phrase "He's just a little guy" comes from internet memes, but you would be wrong.
The true origin of the phrase belongs to celebrated author Tamora Pierce, in her 1983 novel Alanna: The First Adventure, when Gary says, "Stillâwhat can Alan do for you? He's just a little guy"(49).
Thus, whenever we say of someone or some creature that they are "just a little guy," what we are really saying is that they are a short redheaded knight-in-training with some sort of Gender going on who will kick your butt given half a chance.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. May we all be the little guys we wish to see in the world.
Pierce, Tamora. Alanna: The First Adventure. New York, Random House, 1983.

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Shane does an interview after they're outed where he says, kind of off-handedly, that the one thing that still bothers him about having to keep their relationship secret for so long is that there are no pictures of them together as a couple from those years.
Someone clips it and it goes viral.
Over the next few days, Shane and Ilya's mentions start to get flooded with pictures. Mostly it's screenshots from various games they played against each other, meticulously picked through by dedicated fans to find every moment Shane and Ilya looked at each other on the ice.
Some screenshots get shared by hundreds of different people because they stand out so obviously: Shane and Ilya meeting each other's eyes during a face off; Ilya looking at Shane while his back is turned, naked longing visible on his face; Shane chasing after Ilya with a small but delighted grin.
There are also pictures from press events, award ceremonies, behind the scenes at All Stars. Seemingly any time Shane and Ilya got captured in the same frame gets dug up and shared.
Finally, a couple of weeks later, the director of Shane and Ilya's CCM commercial posts outtakes from their shoot. It's captioned 'Took a bit of digging but I knew I still had these somewhere! I had to make my contribution to the #HollanovArchives even though this must have been a while before they got together. These kids had crazy chemistry, right from the start!'
Shane hasn't responded to the onslaught yet, too overwhelmed by the (slightly terrifying) dedication of their fans as well as the fact that he now has dozens of pictures clearly displaying his and Ilya's love for each other during a time in their lives when it was so desperately hidden.
He does respond now, sharing the director's post with a sincere (and publicist-approved) caption thanking him and the fans.
Ilya also shares the post, tacking on 'yes if a while means a few hours đ ' like he didn't cry when Shane showed him the videos.
it's the one-year anniversary of WoT season 3's premiere, which is fine and chill and I have no particular emotions about it. [lie]
i know i've posted the "my little artist claudia" before in a different format but it kills me every time lol
interview with the vampire tweet round up 116//xxx
no i dont ride my horse into battle what the hell is wrong with you she could get hurt. she drops me off and then she stands on the sidelines with a gun
itâs 2028. trump is dead. elon is dead. zuckerberg is dead bezos is dead theyâre all dead
Like to charge reblog to cast

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amir khusrow (1253â1325 CE)
This is back on my dash! And listen, I love to see Amir Khusrau getting appreciation, but this translation ignores a lot. The original rhymes! And scans! And does playful things with register! And conveys a tone of affectionate banter between the two speakers, not least because it has them both addressing each other as sakhi (translated above as âgirlâ) in the last two lines. I think taking some liberties with line order is worth it to preserve more of the restâand I think thereâs a better translation of sakhi. And so:
He only visits once a year, I splurge big on him when heâs here, His kisses make my tastebuds tango. Who, bitch, your man? Nah, bitch, a mango.
Reverse Unpopular Opinion Meme: Wheel of Time!
I love how Wheel of Time (Jordan edition) is a series which really deep down believes that people are people and everybody is ultimately kinda trapped in their own cultural upbringing and point of view, but that this doesn't condemn them to being a Good Guy or a Bad Guy, in a way that is very hopeful about the basic nature of humanity and is also utilised for some extremely funny point-of-view humour. I love that every single character is looking at a different character going 'man, how come they have it together when I'm such a mess'. I love that it says quietly but emphatically that an influx of Muslim-coded non-white refugees to the heroes' rural hometown brings prosperity and new industry and positive change that should be embraced. I love that its human bad guys are the Inquisition via the Klu Klux Klan and a chattel slavery empire with Southern accents and a bunch of deranged academics, but, this is important, it still thinks academic research and being a giant nerd is a hugely valuable (and gender-neutral) area of human interest. I think it has held up remarkably well nearly forty years after the first book was published and I think it will continue to do so.
(meme here)
Just realizing the funniest detail from the new Vampire Lestat teaser: at the start, Louis and Lestat are on a video call on Lestat's iPad. But when Lestat is walking to the bookstore, he's talking with Louis on a cellphone instead.
Which means at some point during this conversation, Lestat must've had to end the original call, call Louis again on a new device, which Louis would have to willingly pick up, and then be like "okay can you hear me? you're on? cool now that I have you back on the phone WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON LOUIS"
he would have interviewed the fuck out of those vampires
now i'm nawht puhticularly familiuh with how well the vampiuh mind functions aftuh a hundred yeeuhs of repeated trawmuh, but i- i do buhlieve, louis, you have recawlled multipuhl moments wheuh you tawlk to the apparishun of yuh ex-husbund whom you murduhed in cold blood....lawgically I can only be led to one conclusion....
louis, you have schizophreniuh
The Heated Rivalry and Interview with the Vampire crossover no one wants to see is Shane Hollander and Lestat de Lioncourt outbidding one another on luxury Montreal real estate.

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Unless you speak whatever the language in this is (maybe Russian? It sounds at least related to Russian), you wonât understand exactly what theyâre saying
You will however, understand exactly what theyâre saying from the context of the video
And you will get to hear this personâs wonderful laughter
Sound definitely needs to be on
Sounds like German to me, but this is hilariously bad planning.
Itâs definitly not german, but god i need to know who planned this bathroom
it is 100% Russian, and i am wheezing in the same language now
going to attempt a rough translation because this is so funny to me
itâs not going to be very literal because trying to translate every mumbled phrase and conversational word will be Very Annoying
âSo hereâs yourâhereâs our hotel room. The door to the bathroom is clear, so you enter the bathroom, and everythingâs normal, you look at yourself, and everyone whoâs in the hallway can see you. And over hereâs the shower, itâs relatively private. You enter the shower, and like wash yourselfâ *breaks down laughing* Well okay okay, you decide to wash your hands, or sit down on the toilet andâ *another fit of laughter* Fine, fine, itâs actually all okay because you grab this and youâŚuh, and youâre like âI want some privacyââ, and you closeâyou close the curtain, and then you close this curtainâ *laughs* And you close that curtain too, and now you want to sit on the toilet and youâre like âOkay everythingâs closed, you canât see in", and so you sit down on the toiletâ *intense laughter*â
The Beholding