Tragedy

When I was around 18 and I started slowly accepting that I had been raped as a teen, I became certain that I wasn't actually gay but just traumatized. I was supposed to be straight or bi, but my trauma had broken me and ruined me forever. I was never gonna know true love or sexual fulfillment. Even though i figured out my homosexulity when I was around 12, which was before my trauma, this was the only possible explanation for me. It couldn't just be that I was naturally gay, I was just disgusting and broken, malfunctioning.

when I was deep in queer spaces in my early twenties, the genital preference debate prayed on that fear. I wasn't an actual lesbian, I was just penis repulsed due to trauma. I wasn't normal or healthy. Sex terrified me. I was on edge constantly and feeling guilty about everything

In my twenties when earlier trauma from my childhood resurfaced and almost drove me to the unthinkable, I started spiralling again. I was broken from the beginning. I wasn't gay, I was never gonna get married or start a family or anything. My own body disgusted me. I felt like a fraud. I dare I call myself a lesbian. I'm nothing.

I keep crying when I think about it. I scrutinized myself so much, I put myself on trial again and again and again AND AGAIN and for fucking what. For whose approval. When do I get to just exist and feel okay

I'm grown now and I'm on my way to fixing my relationship with my body. But I want to make amends with my heart too, but I don't know how. Intimacy still scares me, but what else is there. How do I fix myself

Damn can you believe I wrote all that because my PTSD recovery Marvel fanfiction started hitting a bit too close to home and I couldn't sleep at all?? I'm reaching new levels of fandompilled. Anyway I'm gay, I was born gay, I'll always be gay no matter what I've been or will be subjected to. The only requirement is exclusive same sex attraction and that's it. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. I love you lesbians

Bisexuals categorically refusing to date trans people IS transphobic full stop. It's nothing like gay or straight people not dating trans people since bisexuals are innately capable of attraction to both sexes, they willingly choose to reject trans people. Their reasonings are also indirectly really shitty towards GNC non-trans people. "I don't want a woman/man who looks like a man/woman!" "But I don't agree with trans ideology!" GC trans people exist, you know.

Reblog if you support transphobic bisexuals

Bisexuals aren’t a public sexual resource trans people are being unfairly denied access to. They are people. No one is entitled to sexual activity from anyone. Sex isn’t a right. Demanding people fuck you isn’t activism. Looks like you should just go fuck yourself anon.

Bi does not mean we're the public bicycles. We have standards. Read the "Dump Your Puppygirl" article and then ask again why bisexuals don't want to date trans people.

hi, hi, hello! hi fandom space! i’m a sex favorable asexual! yeah, i exist! yes, i’m the one you keep pointing out when you want to ship canonically aro/ace characters! hi! guess what, i hate you. stop it. stop using me to erase my friends who aren’t sex favorable, because you know what? it’s actually really awful of you to only believe i exist when you want to erase a different part of my community. stop using me to encourage allonormativity. you as an allo person do not get to use ace-/aro-spec people to encourage our erasure and dismissal. no. i hate it and i hate you. stop.

What is a sex favourable asexual?

an asexual who is ok with having sex/sexual activity

You have sex without being aroused? Why?

asexuality is to have little to no attraction, not necessarily no arousal.

So you have sex with people you don't even find attractive?

yes.

Why

why not?

Because you're not aroused by people you dont find attractive?

let's say for a moment that's true. so what?

So you're having sex when not physically wanting it?

no. you've made quite the logical jump there.

You're not sexually aroused by a person you're having sex with. Are you sexually aroused by laying back and thinking of England? The absolute majority of people have sex because they like a person and find them sexually attractive. YOU go and tell me there's some secret way to be sexually aroused without being sexually aroused??

the act of sex can be arousing in and of itself. a person can be sexually aroused without being sexually attracted to the person they are having sex with. you’re making a lot of false associations, taking them to be true, and using them as if they’re a valid argument against the existence of sex favorable asexuals. also, if you have statistics, i’d love to see a source.

I think part of getting better is complete ego death. Like you’re not above setting a timer for 5 minutes and focusing on a task. You’re not above doing a very simple 3 minute workout to start. You’re not above reading for 10 minutes a day when you first get out of your reading slump, even if you used to read for hours. You’re not above starting slow and then building up to where you want to be/where you once were. What you are above is total inertia. Doing something really is better than doing nothing. Radically accept where you are, radically accept your limits, and go from there. Don’t let your ego get in the way.

you were born in 2006? what are you? a Honda Civic?

can i fucking help you?

listen to sexworkers but only the ones filming anonymously from the comfort of their bedrooms and never the ones who are trafficked or groomed and are forced to do scenes that they don’t want to with people they don’t want to at the risk of their livelihood or even life because those stories bum me outttt and therefore don’t count despite making up the majority of cases.

i want to turn on the tv turn on a random movie and it’s directed by a woman, it’s written by a woman, the lighting was done by a woman, the cinematographer was female, the score was written by a woman, the foley artists were women… i want to go see the orchestra and the conductor is female, the trombone section is all women, the cellists are women, the programme is music by women, the artistic director is a woman, the orchestra manager is a woman, the person who booked the venue is female, the double basses are women…

abandonware should be public domain. force companies to actively support and provide products if they don't wanna lose the rights to them

Game companies hate emulation, but none of them seem to understand that a lot of us would just buy ROMs from them directly if we could. I don't want a fifth remake of Final Fantasy IV, I want to pay five bucks for the 3MB file you already made bank with thirty years ago. Nobody who wants to play something for the purpose of retro gaming is going to consider a $40 remake as the alternative option, and we're certainly not going to let the original dissappear. They're crying about opportunity cost for a product they're not even selling.