@merthurmicrofic | prompt: Stars | words: roughly 4.2k | previous installments: corridor , linger | highly recommend reading linger to accompany this but you don't have to, I have no idea how this turned out to be the longest installment ???? |
One could hardly call it advisable.
Why use magic in Camelot? He's not sure.
Why use magic to heal Uther Pendragon? He's not sure.
Except that's a lie. He knows exactly why.
Because when all was said and done, and Arthur stood over his father's fading form, Merlin couldn't stand to watch the despair slowly taking hold of him.
So. There was only one clear solution.
Keep Uther alive and kicking for as long as possible.
It'd been a rather lackluster display, if you asked him.
The dead of night, a single candle lighting the room, his hand pressed firmly to the chest of a man he'd wished death upon so many times, and the words of a language that same man had fought so hard to eradicate spoken into a heavy silence.
And it was slow. But he'd restore the man to his imposing stature if that's what it took to keep Arthur happy.
He hadn't originally planned on saying anything-but plans often get wrenches thrown in them. Especially his.
He never thought about what to expect when he finally told Arthur what he was.
He also didn't think Arthur would ever put it together himself, all things considered.
Though, maybe, he should have given the man more credit. Gaius had been telling him to prepare for the worst-Uther's sudden signs of recovery were nothing short of unbelievable.
Arthur's gaze will haunt him for the rest of his days. That look.
That knowing glint in his eyes as he surveyed Merlin for a solid twenty minutes before finally asking.
"Did you heal my father with magic?"
Merlin couldn't find it in himself to respond, fear stealing his movements.
He hadn't expected to feel arms wrap tightly around him, holding him firmly against Arthur's chest. Strong and warm and consuming.
"It's something I've always had," Merlin confessed.
To his surprise there was no outrage. Only the feeling of Arthur's head pressing into the crook of his neck.
"I'm a sorcerer Arthur, I'm-"
At first, be didn't quite believe the man had said it. Sure it was just the trick of his imagination.
But Arthur's form weighed heavy against him, a shakey breath leaving his lungs, "Thank you."
Merlin melted against Arthur's embrace, treasuring the feeling and memorizing the way hands kept him firmly in place and the breath against his neck.
They stayed like that for what could have been the better half of an hour before a knock at Arthur's door pulled them from their trance.
Arthur entwined their fingers when he got the chance.
Merlin draped his arms over tense shoulders.
He's pretty sure Arthur kissed him first, though he could have initiated at some point. It doesn't really matter, he just knows it felt like unlocking a piece of himself he didn't realize was missing.
"Better today." Merlin doesn't look at Uther. If he's being honest, the reason Uther's recovery has been so rocky is probably because he can't stand the man, but well. "He was responding earlier today, and I even got him to eat a little."
A troublesome bugger is what he's been, barely rasping a no like a petulant toddler anytime Merlin suggests straying from his very limited routine. He did eat though, and he let Merlin go through a few exercises with him, which is a massive accomplishment for them.
Arthur's voice comes faint, a tenderness to it that Merlin has begun to associate with Uther, "That's good."
"He's not fought me once today, I think I'm growing on him," He adds, knowing well that Arthur will find it amusing.
That smile graces his true king's face, "Perhaps, though I think he's always been a little fond of you."
Merlin wants to burst into a fit of truly undignified laughter, but he refrains, keeping it to a short huff as he closes the distance between them, "Right. Well, you know him best. So I won't argue."
"That's unlike you Merlin," Arthur flashes him a cheeky smirk.
"Hm," ugh he can't believe he's in love with this fool, "would you like to have dinner here tonight?"
A fondness passes over Arthur's expression, gentle and adoring. Oh, he's in love with this man.
"I'd like that-and let's try to get him a bath today, since he's doing better," Arthur whispers.
"Of course," Merlin resists the urge to lean into the man's space and hold him, "I'll fetch the water, is there anything else you need from me?"
"No just prepare him a bath."
Merlin steps to the side, playing the role of obedient servant. Even if the man isn't fully aware, he knows Uther is observing at all times. It's a little unnerving, honestly.
Arthur follows him though, opening the door for him. Merlin can't help but find the gesture endearing, turning back as he steps past the threshold of Uther's room to whisper a goodbye.
Arthur beats him to it, bringing Merlin's hand to his lips, breath dancing across the skin as a painfully sweet "Thank you" leaves him.
Merlin won't get tired of hearing Arthur say that. He won't get tired of the way Arthur kisses him like he's something to be cherished. And he won't get tired of the way Arthur looks at him.
The things he would do just to see that smile. He doubts Arthur would think very highly of him if he knew.
Its only when he gets down the hall he realizes he didn't say anything-rendered speechless like a lovesick fool.
Agravaine brushed past him, only to stop, turn on his heel and grab Merlin's shoulder.
He pulls himself away from the man in an instant, "He's visiting with his father."
Agravaine rolls his eyes in a not so subtle display, "Of course he is."
"I'll let him know you're looking for him," Merlin presses his lips together in a fake smile.
"My lord," Merlin pauses, reminding himself to watch his tongue, "perhaps you should wait until Arthur has had some more time with the king."
Agravaine goes to say something else but stops, looking at Merlin for a long moment, "Understood."
Nobody could say he didn't try to be respectful, it's not his fault that apparently his face had other plans.
One day he'd get Arthur to take care of himself-maybe. If the damned fool would ever give himself a break.
Merlin brushed a hand through messy blond hair, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he looked down at the peaceful expression on Arthur's face.
He hated to wake the man up, he really did, but they needed to set the day in motion.
Slowly, bleary eyes blinked open, squinting up at Merlin. A low grunt left Arthur as he straightened his posture, looking at the desk, and piecing everything together.
"I'd like it if you slept in your bed, you know," Merlin scolded him.
"If you want me in bed so badly, join me," Arthur shrugged, face completely straight, tone completely serious.
They had to start the day.
He had to bring Uther breakfast.
Arthur was needed somewhere else because he's always needed somewhere else.
But Merlin could not bring himself to care as his lips crashed against Arthur's.
"If you wanted me so badly all you had to do was ask."
Correction, Merlin wanted him so badly it might actually kill him if he doesn't get something.
Arthur grit his teeth, "I've wanted you for three fucking years, sorry I'm not in the habit."
Hands found his waist, pulling him down onto Arthur's lap, a drunken hazy feeling shooing away all of Merlin's common sense as a truly embarrassing sound of need left his throat.
"Then get in the habit," Merlin basically whined as he made Arthur's personal space his own.
In the back of his mind he was vaguely aware that they could not be doing this right now, but Arthur's hands gripped his thighs and suddenly he couldn't remember what day it was.
He just knew Arthur's body was on his, and that hands where studying him like a book, and that sounds he'd never known he could make we're leaving him.
He thought he knew the definition of ecstasy, clearly not.
There was nothing like Arthur combing over every inch of him with his lips and tongue.
He felt like he was seeing stars, Arthur's name lost on his lips when the man came back to claim them once more.
He couldn't help the way his hips sought friction, earning a choked sound from Arthur as he reciprocated the motion without a second thought.
"Have I told you how beautiful you are?"
He couldn't seriously expect Merlin to be able to form a coherent response when he was touching him like this. He couldn't remember when his tunic had been discarded.
"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me," Arthur scraped his teeth over the line of his throat.
All Merlin could offer was a breathless moan as he drug his nails down Arthur's back.
"All I think about is you."
They were somewhere between calling off the entire day and wrapping up here and now when a knock at the door all but ripped them from the moment as the dawning horror of neglected responsibilities fell upon them.
The room suddenly became a heinous echo chamber of noise, forcing them both to finally take notice of their surroundings.
Merlin immediately fell back on the bed, "This isn't happening."
He did not cause half the room to start floating.
"Sorry love, but I think it is," Arthur chuckled slightly, earning himself a smack to the chest.
"Shut up-ugh I haven't lost control like this since I was a child," Merlin buried his face in his hands.
"I'm taking that as a compliment."
"Oh I'm sorry I didn't realize I finished," Merlin glared at him, pushing the man off so he could find his tunic and actually do his job.
Another more insistent knock at the door.
"I did not ask you to kiss me," Arthur tries to defend himself.
"You quite literally invited me into your bed and pulled me into your lap," Merlin checked himself over, finding multiple dark bruises that Arthur is SO lucky will go otherwise unseen.
Hands rested on his hips, and Merlin was about to smack him again only to be placated by lips trialing down his jaw.
"I'll make it up to you tonight, I promise."
Merlin cursed him internally. Cursed this kingdom too while he was at it.
Something was always falling apart or calling Arthur away or threatening to kill him or both of them.
Of course he wasn't actually that angry, but Arthur needed to believe he was because he had a lot to make up for. So.
Luckily, despite the fact it had felt much longer, he and Arthur hadn't actually had much time to themselves. So they weren't too far behind schedule.
Still, as Merlin pushed the door open he became very aware that Uther had been waiting for him.
"Expecting me?" He'd been wondering how the man was doing comprehending the passage of time. It didn't quite seem to click, though he had a decent grasp on his own schedule.
Merlin suddenly felt as though the man somehow knew he'd been-entangled with his son, and become overly aware of how freely they'd been displaying affection around the man.
"How are you feeling this morning, my lord?" He transitions into a more professional tone, the one that he hopes is enough to keep his head for the time being.
"Fine," Uther huffs. Merlin spares him a glance, noting that he seems disgruntled, gaze focused on the window like it typically is.
"Right," Merlin pauses. Nothing is happening down below, the rain keeping regular courtyard activities at bay. How...boring. "Then how about a walk? Yes?"
"Very well then, we'll get you fed and dressed," Merlin looks at the bowl of porridge he brought, and truthfully prays Uther will actually eat it. "And then we can go for a walk."
To his amazement, the king actually seems to want to eat.
Something faint tugs at his heart, and he knows that smile will grace Arthur's face. That excited one.
"You ate quite well today, Arthur will be pleased," He praises Uther. It usually encourages him to do similar tasks. Merlin can't prove it-and heavens above knows that Arthur would vehemently deny it, but he and his father are the same in that way.
Which only makes his skin crawl a little bit.
He keeps with simply praising Uther for small things, like when he gets his feet under him (even if he does step on Merlin's foot). Once he's gained his bearings, he's actually walking rather well. Which is good, Arthur will be glad to hear it.
He watches the king carefully as he pads by his side.
"Merlin, out for a stroll?" Gwaine's voice causes him to look away from Uther.
"Its good to see his majesty up and about," Leon bows to the king out of respect.
Gwaine makes no such advances-which is amusing, but fairly dangerous all things considered.
"Arthur will certainly be glad to hear it...if I'm sick Merlin will you care for me just as well?"
He's pretty sure Arthur would let Gwaine die, but he knows that Gwaine knows that.
"If Prince Arthur asks me to, I will, Sir Gwaine," Merlin replies somewhat coldly, hoping Gwaine will realize they still have to be proper in Uther's presence.
"Is everything alright Merlin?" Leon frowns. The look in his eyes is kind and so genuine Merlin almost forgets himself, almost.
"His majesty is alert and aware gentlemen, keep that in mind," Merlin cocks his head to Uther pointedly.
Understanding passes over both knights and they change their posture accordingly.
Uther Pendragon had a knack for making his life just that much harder.
Now, does he think that Uther had a sudden relapse on purpose? No. That's ridiculous.
Does he think it's poetic that Uther had a relapse the second Merlin wained him off the magic potion he'd been administering?
To think the thing he'd tried so hard to snuff out was the only thing keeping him from the other side. Merlin gained a sick sort of amusement from it-a hope, that when the man eventually passed on and he looked back to the mortal coil he would see Merlin for what he was. And he hoped his spirit never knew peace.
He's certain that if Arthur knew of his little fantasy he would be appalled, so he tries not to indulge in it often.
It did seem, as Merlin looked the king over, that Uther wasn't necessarily relapsing. He'd contracted something else all together.
Which was strange, but nothing he couldn't remedy.
"He'll be okay." Its possible, he thinks to himself, Uther's affliction has worsened his immune system. The man is not eating as he should be, he is not as strong. There really won't be any telling until the man can be trusted to go about on his own.
His thoughts come to hault when Arthur kneels in front of him.
There's about twenty different things he expected to happen when Percival burst through the physician chamber doors this certainly was not one of them.
Arthur holds onto him, whispering sweet nothings and the highest praise he's ever received from anyone into the nonexistent space between them.
He's not sure anyone would believe him if he told them that Arthur could wax poetic about how much he adored him. Sometimes he wonders if he's making it all up. Arthur doesn't actually say these things, he's simply filling blanks.
But Arthur calls him things that he'd never think of.
And Arthur holds him like he's worth his weight in gold.
Merlin is sat perfectly in the palm of his hand, melting into Arthur's embrace when lips finally meet his. Slotting into place like this is where they're meant to be, eternally wrapped in one another.
And when Arthur pulls away, he's convinced he sees stars in those eyes.
Oh, if only Arthur knew-if he was half as good at spinning a phrase he'd make sure Arthur knew just how deep the well of his love ran.
But for now, "I love you too," was all he uttered. He brings Arthur in again, hoping that even if he can't say half of it, he can show it.
He might actually have forgotten where they were had it not been for the sudden fit of distress Uther displayed.
Merlin returned to his bedside, assessing him once more with a careful hand. "Hm."
His fever hadn't quite gone down, probably wouldn't for another day or two, and he told Arthur as much.
"Guess I'm not really your miracle worker," he quipped.
"I still say so," Arthur replied, leaned casually against the bed post like he wasn't saying the most romantic things Merlin had ever heard.
A giddy feeling bubbles in his chest he once assumed to be reserved for young infatuations, "I should have told you about my magic sooner. You're very easy to please."
Arthur takes his hand, and oh. How does a man make something so simple feel so important?
Merlin feels heat rise to his face, "You're good at that."
"Saying the right things," Merlin places a quick kiss to Arthur's cheek.
Arthur had breakfast brought to him this morning.
Merlin looked at Gaius, Gaius shook his head as if to say 'Don't care, don't want to know.'
And the first thing Arthur did when he walked into the man's chambers was bring him in to a suffocating hold.
He kept talking about being in a good mood without explaining said good mood.
Now, he had informed Merlin the night was theirs to do with as they pleased.
"You're being sweet today, what have you done?"
Arthur acted affronted, "Wha-can I not just show you affection?"
"No." More precisely, Arthur's affection was usually contained to quiet moments together in the morning or late at night. Rarely gestures like breakfast and clearing his schedule.
Even more suspicious, but embarrassingly effective in getting Merlin to let it be, Arthur brought him in for a kiss.
"Arthur I have to bring your father his lunch," he's already late he cannot have this fool distracting him even more.
"I know," Arthur's eyes drop down for a single second, quickly coming back to meet Merlin's.
He narrows his gaze at the prince, silently shaming him for his misconduct. Though he doesn't really care. Arthur can look at him like that all he wants.
When they turn the corner they're both surprised to see Uther leaned slightly against the wall.
Merlin is mostly impressed he managed to get this far, surely Percival would have stopped him? Well, if Uther was determined enough he doubts the knight would risk upsetting the king much.
He turns to Arthur, watching the way the man's expression cools and levels itself. That calm and controlled sort of reverence he's always exhibited around his father.
"Perhaps, after lunch, you could join us for a walk in the courtyard?"
Arthur smiles, a true, brilliant thing that makes Merlin's heart skip a beat, "I think I will."
Its always hard to say goodbye to Arthur.
And he knows that the man will be back soon, and that they will mostly be filling the silence because Uther still has trouble finding his voice, but it's a troublesome thing to be away from Arthur.
Yes, he's aware of how pathetic that sounds.
Perhaps, once Uther is mostly recovered, they can return to their former schedule. Attached at the hip, so on so forth. It does seem like the man is regaining his strength, he's not fighting Merlin much anymore, and everyday he gets to tell Arthur how his father is doing better.
And he gets to see that smile.
So maybe, just maybe, this bastard is worth it.
He's glad that at the bare minimum he and Uther can agree Arthur deserves to take some time for himself.
And he's glad that Uther is well enough to sit next to his son, and bring a smile to his face.
A strange feeling, truly. He never thought seeing Uther could bring him anything but dread.
Though the man still makes his skin crawl and probably always will.
He's bold tonight, and has a plan for Arthur for later if he's not too drunk. That plan, however, will forever remain a secret between the two of them.
If he can keep the damned fool alive, that is.
"Arthur, do not," Merlin takes hold of his wrist and pouts, because he's learned that Arthur folds easily when he does.
"Come now Merlin," Arthur smiles at him, but he can hear it in the man's voice he's already won this argument.
"Hm, I don't like the idea of knives being thrown at your head," Merlin can't believe he's having to say this out loud.
Arthur just laughs, damn clotpole, but looks at him with an adoring glint in his eyes, "Then no knives shall be thrown at my head."
Laughter-geniune, honest, unrestrained laughter-sounds from Uther. Merlin has to stop his jaw from hitting the floor.
How much wine has that man drank? Merlin chuckles himself sitting Arthur down, who is equally as baffled by this development.
He ghosts Arthur's temple with a slight kiss, covering it with a whisper.
"I think it's time for him to go to bed."
Arthur nodded, "Definitely."
Uther came with him without question. If Merlin had known he'd be so complaint he would have gotten the man drunk sooner.
"Arthur will come visit you later I'm sure," Merlin muses as he finishes with Uther's bed linens.
"...how long?" Uther asks.
"Probably within an hour or so, he's already-"
"How long has he been courting you?" The king clarifies, catching Merlin completely off guard.
"Um-I-well-we-" Merlin tries to piece a thought together, "I think that's something you and Arthur should discuss-but six months. Officially."
"Officially," Uther mumbles in what sounds like disapproval.
"Well-" Merlin paused, "like I said. A conversation for Arthur."
Its said with so much conviction that Merlin doesn't know what to think, "You don't say?" He certainly hopes Arthur loves him.
Uther looks up at him, a frown forming on his face, "You love him, right?"
Merlin blinks a few times. That definitely hadn't been on the list of things he assumed Uther would be concerned about.
"My lord, do you really think I'd spend my days at your bedside if I didn't love Arthur with all my being?" It's blunt. A little disrespectful. Okay, incredibly disrespectful. But it gets the job done.
"You are a mystery," Uther sighs.
"Don't say that," Merlin almost gags "don't say things Arthur says."
Merlin supposes he should have figured Uther would have to leave the world with one last massive scar painted across it.
The man was never good for much else other than causing problems, after all.
He can't offer a drop of pity to man himself, but his heart does ache for Arthur.
It rolls off him in suffocating waves, and Merlin wants nothing more than to ease his pain.
But grief is not something you wash away.
He hears Arthur whisper, perhaps not even intending for Merlin to hear, "He'll never know."
Oh how he loves this man.
"He knew," Merlin assures, clinging to Arthur further. Like right on top of one another simply isn't enough. He needs to bury himself within the man's chest and mend his woes with the beating of his own heart.
"You don't have to lie," Arthur rasps.
"You know I wouldn't do that, I'll never lie to you like that Arthur...he asked me how long we'd be courting."
"He did?" The wobble to Arthur's voice breaks his heart.
There's a moment, nothing between them but shaking sighs.
And faintly, Arthur's voice dances across the surface of the silence, "He'll never know I legalized magic."
"Magic. The council reached a majority, the ban was officially repealed."
Oh how deeply he loves this man.
He can't say it enough, "I love you." Merlin kisses his jaw, trails his hands down that broad chest, "I love you."
He takes his hands over strong shoulders and kisses the corner of Arthur's mouth, "I love you."
The words aren't enough. Nothing can ever be enough. He cannot and will not ever be able to fully encapsule all the ways he adores and loves Arthur.
"I need you," Arthur pleads.
"I'm always going to be here," Merlin wraps himself around Arthur, like any amount of space between them will kill them.
There are tears trialing down Arthur's face, and Merlin feels his heart break all over again. Arthur buries his face in the crook of Merlin's neck, taking in shakey breaths, holding him tightly ike he'd ever dream of letting go.
Merlin threads his fingers into Arthur's hair, whispering all the while his adoration and devotion.
titsay
izzy806
andulkaphoto
tangentwithtanner
vaporwave
kianamaiart
kaledo-art
turnnoffyourmind
discoholicmusic
