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@idkhowtomakethis
The anxiety of putting myself out there is wild, why did I sign up for this?

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Terrible news I did find Ryland Grace attractive. Unfortunately that's simply a good looking man. I am not immune to Ryan Gosling apparently
I never said this- but in episode 5 of Merlin, I like to think Arthur asked Lancelot if he thought Morgana was beautiful because he knew that she was, but didn’t feel attracted to her, and wanted to know if the problem was him.
Actually yeah I'd like to add to this-
If we want to make this scene feel less awkward than its original framing this is a good way to do that but also it could be seen as Arthur testing Lancelot's integrity. It's reasonable to assume that many knights have commented on Morgana's beauty or maybe even tried to court her, and that of course leads to less than respectful comments. So if one so desired this interaction could very well be interpreted as Arthur testing whether or not Lancelot would speak crudely if/when prompted or even on his own accord
See vivmith obviously having no fics is fine thats fine Vivian is a back ground character in 1 episode and Mithian is in like 2 episodes????? But Morgwen?
Morgwen????? Two thousand+ fics and all ao3 could pull up for me was merthur?????
I'm gonna have to go to fanfic.net aren't I?

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I have a merthur microfic done but I'm so mad at the ship for taking over everything I might just toss it
Long suffering sigh
being nonbinary is sick as fuck but sometimes there is also the isolation
it's something we think a lot about, this fact that the world just really doesn't accommodate for people that aren't Women or Men. there's an interview with sam smith (i think???) where they mention something about how they've just had to accept that people will always misgender them at first until corrected. and for us, even surrounded by people who care in a relatively safe environment, it still happens. we're used to it, but over and over, there's that assumption. if you're trans, you're the "opposite" of what you were assigned at birth. or you're basically just cisgender with a fun dash of side pronouns.
and, hell, sometimes we wish we were just a girl, just a guy, that we had a simple answer. that we didn't have to constantly be reminded that people will always see us as something we're not. that the answer was clear for us in how to navigate the world, legal/political hell aside.
and yet, even in good times, the concept of a gender neutral bathroom is still a punchline.
being nonbinary is sick as fuck but sometimes there is also the isolation
per my last desperate howl at the heavens,

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I love lying about my relationship status
My mother is a terrible fucking liar istg
They're trying to keep me an extra thirty minutes little do they know I had a back up plan
Would people pay to read original work from me or is my hubris clouding my judgement
Coworker asked me out I'm gonna jump fnsmxbxksmdnsksmdn

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Fuck I hate this job
I shouldn't have to work I should be paid to sit around and talk about Merlin all day