Byulilmon

child of a WW2 vet

traumatized vietnam war vet who was called "the iceman"

had a poly relationship with two women where "they had been friends before" and it's implied he got not a lot of say

went to the citadel

got a degree in nuclear engineering

married his editor who a) was a female sci-fi editor in the 1970s and b) was also responsible for Ender's Game

started writing sci-fi because he was injured and got fed up with the writing of other authors

DEAN IS OUT HERE COACHING HER ON HOW TO FLIRT WITH A GUY???

SIR. HOW DO YOU KNOW HOW TO FLIRT WITH GUYS???

OH WAIT.

I'm sorry you want to play oppression olympics and engage in infighting soooo bad while I'm and many many many more queers sitting here with nothing available to them. At all. No access to queer groups. No lgbtqia+ history to read because it's either banned or erased completely. No support groups. Queer events aren't available or they get raided. No apps for queer people to find each other. Flags are banned. Donations aren't possible. People getting thrown to jail, tortured, killed JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE QUEER. NO MATTER WHAT KIND OF QUEER.

Are you stupid or ignoring us on purpose?

I know you have it bad too. That's why no matter why I have sympathy and solidarity with each queer person. Please let's be there for each other.

I have a friend I know from when we were both 6. She is the only person living nearby and so she saw me go from walking through limping to wheelchair on a daily basis. I keep her updated on my health even tho we rarely hang out anymore. She was gonna come over yesterday and I had to cancel. She asked if I can’t hang out later that day. When I said i won’t feel better later, that if I feel that bad in the morning later will only get worse she got annoyed and “joked” that I’m just finding excuses. And I was surprised, she knows all about me being disabled after all? So, a bit taken aback, I told her it’s a normal thing for me.

“But you got the diagnosis now, aren’t you better?? I thought you’ll get better now”

What I haven't seen much discussion about is how it applies to her too. Eva Stratt doesn't have friends, or a family waiting for her. She doesn't have a dog either.

Big fan of high academia Dr Ryland “will call you a staggering waste of carbon” Grace who is a short tempered, egotistical, and kind of a jerk.

Big fan of how Ryland Grace can be both these things but while still having his same fundamental personality as a good person and wet cat.

Big fan of how it’s generally agreed that teaching burned the evil out of him and let his whimsy shine.

everyone gets onto eva stratt for the "think about it long time" vs. "you have three hours" thing but

operating on book canon a little bit: if grace couldn't do it-- if he said no*-- the alternative was to scramble and fly in the next most qualified volunteer, who had 0 training, 0 knowledge of astrophage, and was not an astronaut. three hours could have been three hours of training for that replacement. three hours could have been three hours of preparation for grace, if he said yes

eva stratt gave grace three hours. not to decide, necessarily, because the decision was going to be made the way it was no matter what. but three hours to come to terms with it, to grieve, to mentally prepare himself. three hours that could have been spent giving humanity a better chance to survive

she borrowed three hours that she didn't have to give grace space to process. to get himself together and come to her, teary-eyed but resolved, and say yes.

There’s this really popular stereotype where people deduce aroace people to garlic bread or overall a food they are obsessed with. Don’t get me wrong, I have my food that I love but it has nothing to do with being aroace. “AroAce people don’t want relationships, they want garlic bread! Haha!” No- that shouldn’t be what our sexuality is based on. We are not a food. I shouldn’t see garlic bread mentioned every time I see an aroace video.

Next, I hate when people say “It must be so easy because you don’t have to worry about love!” or “I wish I was aroace so I didn’t have to deal with my crush” WE ARE NOT A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEMS. I think society forgets just how much the media and just life pushed love onto people. It is not easy to be aroace. I struggle with it daily and I hate thinking of the future. From a young age kids are asked how many kids they want, main characters always needing a love interest, “true love” in movies, just the other day I saw a video saying that they hope the person watching will find my soulmate. “Just ignore it!” It’s hard when it’s EVERYWHERE. In this day and age it’s a struggle when people can’t even live without the income of their spouse, it’s so hard to live on our own when everything’s so fucking expensive

I’m not saying we should stop bringing love into everyday lives, I understand that some/most people need and want it. I’m asking for people to have a little bit of sympathy and realize that we exist. I just want me to say “I don’t want to be married” and for the topic to be dropped. I don’t want to hear “You say that now…” or “You’ll find someone one day.”

Also, some aromantics are in a relationships, some asexuals have sex, YOU DON’T HAVE TO BERADE THEM BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU KNOW THEIR OWN SEXUALITY!! Just because I’m aroace doesn’t mean I’m some hermit who hates talking to people and hates physical touch. I’m an extrovert! I love physical touch! Yes I want to cuddle! Yes I want a hug! Being aroace isn’t just for the people who hate touching others. Some of us are introverts, some of us are extroverts, some of us hate physical touch, some of us love physical touch.

On top of this, some people in the queer community don’t even acknowledge AroAce being a sexuality! It’s crazy just how much hate is pressed on this sexuality.