Howl's Moving Asshole

i don't even gaf about shipping discourse because i'm a big boy and a bad person for other worse reasons but if i can be real for a moment "proship DNI" in bio means nothing to me. if you want to keep me out you're going to need to line your blog with salt and iron or rat poison or something.

actually if i were to be less flippant and more brutally honest with you all my disdain for it stems from how much of it is just a thinly veiled excuse for people to fight about their fictional relationship preferences or simply for the sake of arguing without any investment in the reality of what they're claiming to represent and then take pride in their empty, performative activism. i still recommend the rat poison though.

girl help they are calling me a pedophile sympathiser in the notes for trying to point out that being disgusted by something is not the same as meaningfully working to prevent and safeguard against it by critically engaging with the complex reality of it. can i please just have the rat poison.

I'm still astounded that anyone reads bios. I don't read them. I don't give a fuck. Block me if you don't like me but I'm not fucking going to a blog and reading a bio before I reblog something is everyone insane

"I am the Sword of God" is like easily top 10 things to declare immediately before doing something really stupid that will probably injure you

easy to forget but book jon snow is great actually. he gets so drunk he cries in his first chapter. he's 16 years old and laser focused on loan negotiation. he keeps getting promoted against his will. he's the chosen fantasy protagonist with the worst genre awareness ever. he implements pro immigration social reforms. he has a giant albino pet wolf. he cuts a guy's head off. he thinks he invented cunnilingus. he's been dead for 15 years.

“I would die for my kids” your children want an apology

your made up scenario isn’t real (shocker) and makes no difference when your kids are starving for your acknowledgment of the pain you caused them. you’re only performing the role of a good parent, without having to actually do any heavy lifting

Out of Touch Thursday

OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY

but im out of my head when you’re not around…

this is the only out of touch thursday you can reblog this

KONATA OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY IZUMI IS MY TWIN????!

woaahh happy out of touch birthursday julia

@elodieunderglass are they looking for the polar opposite of O Holy Thunder?

Apparently, and I want to see the candidate videos!

This is more inspirational than I think it was originally intended to be

there are days where NO ❌️ video games are played and there are days where video games are played for 10 or maybe 14 hours straight

people are saying this is a song and i can't imagine what it could possibly sound like. what the hell are you talking about

I am so glad that in 2026 there are people experiencing Günther for the first time.

the youths yearn for the ding ding dong

I think the reason I still enjoy tumblr is that even though this all still pisses me off, I know that anything that makes me mad on here is 100% earnest. It's not ragebait or engagement farming, y'all are actually just that stupid sometimes