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Jules of Nature
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@billy79
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look. look at this beautiful sword meme. i’m going to cry
@petermorwood
I saw and reblogged this one a while back, but it’s always worth repeating, and this time I’m adding a bit of background info comparing common fantasy sword features to the Real Thing (with pictures, of course.)
Leaf-bladed swords are a very popular fantasy style and were real, though unlike modern hand-and-a-half longsword versions, the real things were mostly if not always shortswords.
Here are Celtic bronze swords…
…Ancient Greek Xiphoi…
… and a Roman “Mainz-pattern” gladius…
Saw or downright jagged edges, either full-length or as small sections (often where they serve no discernible purpose) are a frequent part of fantasy blades, especially at the more, er, imaginatively unrestrained end of the market.
Real swords also had saw edges, such as these two 19th century shortswords, but not to make them cool or interesting. They’re weapons if necessary…
…but since they were carried by Pioneer Corps who needed them for cutting branches and other construction-type tasks, their principal use was as brush cutters and saws.
This dussack (cutlass) in the Wallace Collection is also a fighting weapon, like the one beside it…
…but may also have had the secondary function of being a saw.
A couple of internet captions say it’s for “cutting ropes” which makes sense - heavy ropes and hawsers on board a ship were so soaked with tar that they were often more like lengths of wood, and a Hollywood-style slice from the Hero’s rapier (!!) wouldn’t be anything like enough to sever them. However swords like this are extremely rare, which suggests they didn’t work as well as intended for any purpose.
I photographed these in Basel, Switzerland, about 20 years ago. Look at the one on the bottom (I prefer the basket-hilt schiavona in the middle).
A lot of “flamberge” (wavy-edge) swords actually started out with conventional blades which then had the edges ground to shape - the dussack, that Basel broadsword and this Zweihander were all made that way.
The giveaway is the centreline: if it’s straight, the entire blade probably started out straight.
Increased use of water power for bellows, hammers and of course grinders made shaping blades easier than when it had to be done by hand. This flamberge Zweihander, however, was forged that way.
Again, the clue is the centre-line.
Incidentally those Parierhaken (parrying hooks - a secondary crossguard) are among the only real-life examples of another common fantasy feature - hooks and spikes sticking out from the blade.
Here are some rapiers and a couple of daggers showing the same difference between forged to shape and ground to shape. The top and bottom rapiers in the first picture started as straights, and only the middle rapier came from the forge with a flamberge blade.
There’s no doubt about this one either.
The reason - though that was a part of it - wasn’t just to look cool and show off what the owner could afford (any and all extra or unusual work added to the price) but may actually have had a function: a parry would have been juddery and unsettling for someone not used to it, and any advantage is worth having.
However, like the saw-edged dussack, flamberge blades are unusual - which suggests the advantage wasn’t that much of an advantage after all.
Here’s a Circassian kindjal, forged wiggly…
…and an Italian parrying dagger forged straight then ground wiggly…
There were also parrying daggers with another fantasy-blade feature, deep notches and serrations which in fantasy versions often resemble fangs or thorns.
These more practical historical versions are usually called “sword-breakers” but I prefer “sword-catcher”, since a steel blade isn’t that easy to break. Taking the opponent’s blade out of play for just long enough to nail him works fine.
NB - the curvature on the top one in this next image is AFAIK because of the book-page it was copied from, not the blade itself.
The missing tooth on that second dagger, and the crack halfway down this next one’s blade, shows what happens when design features cause weak spots.
So there you go: a quick overview of fantasy sword features in real life.
Here’s a real-life weapon that looks like it belongs in a fantasy story or film - and this doesn’t even have an odd-shaped blade…
Just a very flexible one…
If you want more odd blades, Moghul India is a good place to start…
i could not ask for a better addition to my meme post than blade education thank you so much
@hissingjay
All great suggestions
This post gets better every time I see it
“A fucking balrog of morgoth”
“Fly you fucking fools”
“I bid you all a very fucking fond farewell”
“Oh gandalf it was just a bit of fucking fun” “oh you’re probably right as fucking usual”
“Meriadoc brandibuck. And peregrin fucking took. i mightve known.”
I did thi b4. Here’s my choice.
And a wise choice it is indeed
I didnt even think of two towers or return of the king lmfao
Yeah there are some good options. I don’t know I imagine my friend coming back from the dead would have more cussing.
I’m adding this every time.
I can’t fucking stop laughing

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Gillian Anderson at Giffoni Film Festival (July 16, 2007).
ok it kinda looks like shit tho
youd look like shit if you were left forgotten in a beer can for 8 years too. dont be fucking rude
Susan Kare, the Artist who designed many of the fonts, icons, and images for Apple, NeXT, Microsoft, and IBM, 1980′s
#oh is it time to repost this susan kare photo again
Important addition y’all
[source]
the guys at r/fuckcars doing the lord's work

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Can confirm. Followed a similar path when they denied me for a recent check on my lungs (Note: I had near complete lung collapse and chest failure in 2023 that nearly ended me, and would prefer not being removed from the void, or having to spend another six months relearning how to breathe and walk again if I escape once more).
Good thing: Not dead! (and not dying more than usual!); Bad Thing: Dealing with capitalistic monopoly-monied insurance companies.
via @5qui99l3
I've watched a lot, and I mean a lot, of jackie chan style kung fu movies and I just gotta say that this is a brilliant joke that is absolutely worthy of and SHOULD appear in one
Ringing the bell at Chion-in in Kyoto 108 times to welcome the New Year. It requires a team of 17 monks.
We need to bring back the bait fish because sometimes it feels like yall can't tell when someone is trolling you
Look at him! He's so cute and he knows that someone posting stupid, brain dead or offensive comments is just trying to get you mad, and you should make fun of them for that.
We as a website need him back in our lives
Wow, I did not see that coming.

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Monsters are human, too
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I see some people in the notes thinking that this is the Death card, but it's not. It's much funnier. It's the Five of Cups, upright, which symbolizes like. Loss. Disappointment. Emotional Suffering. You thought you were going to get something and then you didn't. Even more hilarious than Fox News bringing in a tarot card reader for Trump in 2024 is that same tarot reader immediately flipping over a card that says LOSER.
Like to charge, vote to cast, god I'm tired
Maybe I DO believe in tarot...