𝓪𝓶𝓪𝔃𝓮, 𝓪𝓶𝓪𝔃𝓮, 𝓪𝓶𝓪𝔃𝓮

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move

Gotta try it

I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with.

Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze.

WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA

It’s called the Murder Strut.

IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!!

A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post.

I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT

Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium. 

I bring a real 'actually people who are pregnant do deserve some special consideration because they are effectively at least temporarily disabled if not permanently after some complications' vibe to the party that a lot of people don't seem to like

"become a fish" (gay)

men will jump through an entire circus' worth of hoops rather than admitting they're bi

The level of mental hoops that guy had to jump through to say to his wife, "No, honey! Of course I wouldn't be cheating on you! Sex during gaycations doesn't count!"

this is an insane story

Um…here’s the reddit link? I’m speechless.

Don't worry honey, all the other men on gaycation aren't real people and they stop existing after. Hey, where's all the homophoboa coming from suddenly?

That's the beauty of the gaycation!

I read the shithead guy’s rambling in Nagito Komaeda’s voice

"some men never return because they're "totally feminized" into the state of permanent "pseudo-gayness"" is my favourite line out of the entire post

finding somebody who will laugh at your shitty jokes is joy-inducing but finding a motherfucker who can yes-and all the esoteric bullshit you put out is pure cocaine. this must be the shit all those racuous but good-natured scoundrels down at the tavern are on

“I ain’t reading all that” your brain is rotting and shrinking

Yes, but also, I am begging you on bended knee, paragraph breaks.

something i really liked about project hail mary is that Rocky and Grace are both equally out of their depth and about as competent as the other. theyre both the smart one. theyre both total dumbasses. neither knows whats going on. they both think the other is an idiot baby. they both admire the other's intelligence so much.

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

a party of adventurers that are all equally convinced that they are in completely different forms of media

the mage keeps giving smug glances in the direction they assume a camera is in. the fighter keeps getting indignant about missing attacks because of "bad dice rolls." the rogue is doubtful that a villain is gone for good because "nobody ever stays dead in comics." the paladin attributes fortune to "good rng." none of them have even considered that "tumblr post" was an option

”you are a lawyer he is a hamster” 😭😭😭😭