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welcome to my farm where I keep my dark horse my black sheep my scapegoat and my underdog. my canary in the coal mine died ages ago

No Alvin I don't think you can say that word, I know it's part of the original lyrics but Simon is right you're gonna make a lot of people uncomfortable

common advice for social anxiety is to tell yourself "people aren't going to think less of you just because you said something a bit daft" but the thing is. sometimes they will. and you just have to learn to be cool with that and to treat it as a dnd random encounter rather than letting it ruin your whole day

translator's note: this translation sucks just learn the original language for fucks sake

“ice water makes you sick” “ice water gives you stomach cramps” i’m sorry if i have a hardy and oxlike american constitution but unless you have underlying health issues, the only water temperature that should cause adverse health effects is if you chug a gallon of boiling hot water that has also been laced with nefarious chemicals

used to think it terribly silly (and kinda funny) when fantasy or sci-fi stories would have people refer to major recent historical events as The Flood or The Incident or The Revolution, and im sure historians fucking hate that because it's not helpful or descriptive, but we sure do be calling it The Pandemic

december 12, 2019. i would like to hold a hand

Me too bitch, you ain’t special.

i am special . .And so are you, we dont need to fight

“how could you be so stupid” well you know what. its really not that hard