Jul 25
i know this is going to come off as a really bitter, mean, miserable thing to say but
please if you are traveling to some other country this year, dont tell me
#ppp#im realizing that its actually become a bit of huge emotional trigger for me#at least where im at now#i wish you all safe travels and i hope you have fun and im dont doubt you deserve it and worked hard to do it bht#i really cant handle hearing about it rn#i realized ive had four or five people tell me about their travel plans this year and ive broken down every time#id go to therapy over it but i am trying to save up money#so maybe#someday#years from now maybe#maybe *i* could do it#*i* could go somewhere and see the world#and meet friends and have stories to tell and pictures to show#i *might* have an interview soon for a two month temp position#and thats the second place ive even heard back from since may#i relapsed a few weeks ago and i probably should have just said this then#tbh i should have said this when someone showed me like one (1) nice photo of their visit and i started crying#hindsight i guess#i guess i just didnt realize how much and how often everyone else gets to do this
