What the heck is even happening? @anonym-potato - Tumblr Blog

pom pom crabs are some of the most unethical animals in the ocean

this man is a serial abuser

His pom poms are two sessile invertebrates he holds in his hands and starves so he can punch stuff with anemones who are so desperate to eat that they’ll use maximum sting on anything that gets close to him. When they starve to death he just finds more

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saxifraga-x-urbium

Boris "professional idiot" Johnson wanted to build an island airport in the immediate area.

it's fucking visible

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It is fun to learn.

therealraewest

Hey what the fuck

You weren't kidding they've been trying to get the masts off for 5 years and keep getting foiled because there's probably bombs leaking out of her

angeluslupus

Fun fact: Doxing myself but I live in the blast zone if that thing ever goes up! It's even immortalised in a local artwork:

slowlymychaos

@tatzelwyrm

alksblog

Unfortunately, Gordon Lightfood never did a song about it.

the-haiku-bot

Unfortunately,

Gordon Lightfood never did

a song about it.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

sometiktoksarevalid

sunderedstar

arcaniumagi2

worrkkkkk Cashier person WORKKKKKK

sanlorenzoherald

good morning

sztupy

thatlittleegyptologist

You’ll need the link!

We got Musk off our land. Let's build a monument to remind him he's a sad little b**** with no friends.

ashleeabutton

Not all heroes wear capes, sometimes they publish questionable card games

vulcartist

I translated the Ea-Nasir complaint into vulcan and engraved it in on a cooper plate

tournevis-real

The tumblrest sentence I have ever seen

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ehlihr

adding songs from musicals to character playlists is so stupid like yeah this works just ignore some of that really specific stuff

parkchanwoohoo

eeveestho

ok but the full translation is also extremely good

human-pet-girl

that translation is accurate except for that last part. pflegestufe doesnt really translate to a state of need, its moreso means that the weed would leave you disabled in a way that makes you legally eligible for care or assistance

spin-the-wheel-polls

you were almost turned into a vampire, but before you could be fully turned, the vampire was staked. This left you with a vampire weakness, while still being human.

Spin the wheel to find out your weakness!

How much does this effect you?

Nothing changes

It's inconvenient but I can deal with jty

It will be hard to adjust but I'll figure it out

I don't know if I'll be able to live like this

Maybe I can find another vampire to finish the turning?

I might just kill myself

Results/other

Remaining time: 5 days 22 hours

thanks @theemmjay for submitting this poll idea!! Seriously it's such a cool concept I love it so much

#Can't cross running water #Entirely depends if it's just visible running water or if I can't step over the sewage pipes

aleshakills

*getting too in the weeds of the worldbuilding of a horny tumblr post* Okay I get that you're saying princess, but honestly the dynamic you're describing here seems more like you want to be a duchess or even a lower noble

aleshakills

You wanna be the villainess in an otome anime

aleshakills

This has nothing to do with historical accuracy by the way. It's about the genre conventions and the internal logic of the scenario. If you wanna be a princess getting kidnapped by a dragon or running of to faerie, go for it. If you wanna be a prize locked away in a tower, or an aspiring despot, be a princess.

If you want to have an intense homoerotic rivalry with another girl you met at magical boarding school, you're the daughter of a marquis at best.

#OR☝️you are Barbie

royalhandmaidens

sometimes i think about the history of coffee culture in islam and how it spread like it’s so funny

discovered by sufis who decided it was a miracle from Allah since it allowed them to stay up late into the night for night worship

miracle beans = UNLIMITED DHIKR

cue scholars debating for years about whether it’s haram or halal and if it should be classified as an ‘intoxicant’ or not

fast forward to 16th century ottoman empire, where a woman had the legal right to divorce her husband if he failed to provide her with enough coffee

europeans called it the “mohammaden gruel” or “devil’s drink” bc they believed it to be a “bitter invention of satan and his followers”

fast forward to pope clement viii finally giving in and tasting it to see what the hype is about and then stating: “This Satan’s drink is so delicious that it would be a pity to let the infidels have exclusive use of it.”

pope clement viii then proceeds to BAPTIZE THE COFFEE BEANS

royalhandmaidens

the tags on this post are some of the funniest i’ve ever seen in my notifications but this one made me choke on my Mohammedan Gruel

royalhandmaidens

GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE

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tinyyellowflowers-blog

Went to the grocery store with my kindergartener. We weighed some bananas: 2 pounds even. We weighed a watermelon: 4 pounds even. We weighed some mangos: a little over 1 pound. We weighed the watermelon AND the bananas: 6 pounds even.

“That’s funny” said the child “because 2+4=6 and two pounds and four pounds is six pounds. It’s like the same as math!”

“What happens if you add 6+1?”

“SEVEN”

“What if we put one pound of mangos on the scale?” <mangos added>

“IT’S THE SAME!!”

“OK, what’s 7-4?”

“Three?”

“What if we take the four pound watermelon off the scale?” <watermelon removed>

“Mama! Are you telling me math works In Real Life? Think of all the things you could measure!!”

neatlymanifolded

ripe

loungetoy on twitter

marinebiologyshitposts

such a handsome strain of koi!

bunjywunjy

*shoves one of these raccoons into a sack in a cruel and ultimately misguided attempt to destroy the moon and depower the ocean*

sindri42

NO

blackmosscupcakes

Partial eclipse (viewed through the best of all possible safety devices, Scottish weather)

moveslikekeithrichards

any time i copy paste a message to send to 2 different chats i feel like such a fake ass bitch but im choosing to look at it as the digital equivalent of standing in a doorway hollering so people in both rooms can hear me

kuutamosonaatti

The Wicker Man (1973) | dir. Robin Hardy

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming