Baldwin is a cool name. It is the opposite of Hairloss

steps out of the shower completely dry after parrying every drop of water with my bathroom greatsword

bro your loyal knight smells like shit

in my little pony universe youd go to a job interview and theyd be like so how does your cutiemark reflect your dedication to this position. And every time youd have to spew some bullshit about how your cutiemark of two tennis rackets actually means youre a team player and good at multitasking and view the market like a playing field. or whatever. and you wouldnt even get the job

girl with ptsd voice: hey, so something really bad is gonna happen, right? you guys are picking up on that too, yeah? The other shoe is about to drop, I just know it.

Is that a swarm of locust in your pants or are your dick and balls just heralding the end of days