mermaid

the simultaneous “slow, clean and safe” fucking ended me

beautiful mother soap dispenser just gave birth to a baby foam in my hand

help I’m having ideas beyond my available free time

help I'm having ideas beyond my available energy levels

i think that soy sauce fish and honey bear must be the very very best of friends

a Feeline

I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare

When I was a little boy, girls used to just do random cartwheels for no reason. Then one day, they stopped. Now that I am a man, no women randomly do cartwheels. This is because society is evil and killed the cartwheel impulse in their soul. They don't even spin horizontally anymore. It's fucked up.

i work at an elementary school and the good news is the little girls of today are still doing random cartwheels all the time!

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek