taking notes from the cuck chair

at the bar where shane meets rose, and he tries to order a ginger ale, and the bartender is surprised

not even judgmental! just surprised. he even says they do have it, and i think goes to grab some for shane.

but his little moment of surprise makes shane remember that you're not supposed to order ginger ale at a bar, that that's weird, and he doesn't really understand why that is

he knows that being weird is not allowed, though. so he asks for a beer, whatever beer, because he knows that's the normalest thing he could possibly do, that's what Men Like To Drink.

it's just such a small detail. and we see it happen more than once to shane. it happens also with the waiter at the restaurant when he's having lunch with his parents who's visibly surprised and a little snobby when he asks for a ginger ale and offers sparkling water instead. and again shane just says it's fine.

everywhere shane goes, he gets these little signals that the things that he wants aren't allowed because they're not normal. and it's obvious that he doesn't understand why, which makes sense because there's no fucking logic to why it's okay to order a coke but not a ginger ale. but he's learned to deal with it by just accepting that he must have missed something, he must have done something wrong, and he should just ignore what he wants, maybe decide he doesn't want it at all, so that no one knows that he's breaking the rule of normal even though the rule of normal is arbitrary and stupid and often applies to things that matter as little as what kind of drink you want to order at a bar. even when the signal is just a little bit of surprise from some guy behind a bar. even when it's about a fucking ginger ale.

ginger ale is a metaphor for his sexuality throughout the show (not the book). It is often denied him when he reaches for it. They dont have it, theyre out, someone gets him something else-- except ilya and hayden and himself, all of whom keep it supplied at their houses, specifically for shane. He can be himself with these people, but not in public, at restaurants, etc.

If he doesnt get GA, he gets beer. In the books he reaches for beer far more than he does any specific soft drinks. Sometimes beer is also denied.

At the bar in ep 4, his intention with even going is to intentionally force himself to make a change. He will Be Straight and Normal. He asks a gay man who is flirting with him (whether he catches the flirting or not) for a ginger ale, gets a quirked brow, switches to beer, receives the beer, is told that the only woman he could ever feasibly be interested in at all (an actress he already likes a lot) is in the bar, he gets another beer, goes and socializes, finds her. Has at least 1 more beer. He intentionally makes the "masculine, hetero" choice, leaves with a woman that tics every box except one: she's a woman. Otherwise she is absolutely perfect.

At the club, he says he needs a beer. He is dragged into dancing and given a glass of champagne instead. A perfect- for- him woman dances on his front, a gay man at his back, sandwiching him with choice. Despite his aversion to appearing anything other than straight in public, he notably doesnt react at all to Miles basically humping him from behind. He drinks the champagne, stares balefully at Ilya, leaves with rose, and sleeps with her while imagining ilya.

The next time shane reaches for ginger ale, he is at his own house, desperatrly wanting ilya to respond to his text because he is worried. Ilya has disappeared after a game, after they saw each other the orevious day before the game and then-- nothing after. Not even a text. He gets a can out of his fridge, staring at his phone, willing it to ring, and for the first time ever-- calls him. Reaches out.

i can totally imagine him being some kind of welder bc it takes so much focus and precision and detail and i think shane would be a FREAK for that (especially analyzing other people’s welding jobs; he’s out with ilya, pointing good and bad jobs out and how he’d do it better)

shane who makes bank and works in a shop and works THE FUCK out with college student ilya who tries his best to give shane a lunch everyday (homemade, if he can) who will wake up early to send shane off to work before sleeping some more or going to his classes

shane who tries to kinda be a sugar daddy for ilya (he’s no millionaire, but he does have a lot of leftover money) and will give him money to get food, clothes, anything nice just for him, will spoil the shit out of him

Shane is a CIT- certified regional field maintenance tech employed directly by the MLH to do regular travel and maintenance work on the mechanisms that keep various MLH ice rinks operational (obv he would work in the eastern provinces), and Ilya is a foreign student and tutor working through his PhD in russian and slavic lit studies at McGill on a McCall MacBain scholarship....

1) if it didnt affect his play, which would require practicing in his (canonical) at- home practice rink set up extensively and analyzing his play afterward to determine if it was obvious/ if it caused slowdown, lagging reaction time, etc

2) if he could convince himself no one would find out (includes showers/ dress down and potential injuries)

this boy who hadn't had anything that felt like a home since his mother died didn't even know he'd just met the boy he'd essentially grow up with and one day create a new home with

like t GOD he's always aware enough to not do it when he's mic'd up during a game, but wow wow makes a very regular appearance in his daily routine. almost knocked his protein powder off of the counter? wow wow. set a new lifting pr at the gym? wow wow. finished putting his laundry away? wow wow. getting out of the shower after a long day? wow wow.

Ilya: 🫪 i have got to get out of here

Downstairs, ilya: *sees well- fucked, resplendent, soft shane in his omega hoodie™️* hey remember when I rocked your world like 8 mins ago? 😏

Ilya is delighted and even does the whole hand-waving choreography for "I would like a ring, a diamond ring" part in Shane's face as he blushes. He does this with his non-dominant hand of course, because they have been holding hands the whole video. (Shane will buy Ilya 7 different high-end diamond rings on Newbury Street the next day for him to pick from. Ilya like a good Slavic trophy spouse will pick all of them.)