#preacher

The sensation bloomed within him like fire, and a thought took root deep in his mind. He would crawl to the gates of that temple glimpsed in the dying man’s memory—and make it his own. He would become the new shepherd, the one who saved these poor souls from their fate. He would raise a congregation of the devoted, shaping them little by little, through the Word and through blood.

It had not been difficult. One of the sisters had opened the door without question the moment she saw the collar.

“Come in, Father. We’ve been expecting you.”

He hadn’t even needed to request permission to enter—she had simply stepped aside and held the door wide.

The women received him with open arms.

“We weren’t sure how long it would take for them to send another pastor.”

He had smiled and praised their hospitality, drawing blushes from those who had been cloistered longest within those walls.

He could already hear the whispers circulating about him.

“The new Father is so young… and that smile of his… It won’t take long before we adore him.”

Convincing them to change the hour of the liturgies had proven more arduous. He claimed his training had taught him that the veil of night brought one closer to the Almighty.

Dusk, he said, was a sacred time—more contemplative, more intimate.

Though skeptical at first, the sisters soon adopted the change. And they were right to trust him.

At first, only the sisters and a few vagrants—seeking a full belly and warm bed—attended the masses.

But then a rumor began to spread:

The new pastor promised eternal life.

Here. On Earth.

No more waiting for the solace of a cold grave to be reunited with one’s kin.

He claimed to have brought true immortality.

“You are not dust, nor shall you return to it.”

The pews filled with bowed heads, all paying homage to the new Word of God, which now took flesh in the hungry smile of that shepherd.

As they drank of the blood of their savior, he drank of theirs, those faithful who sought redemption at his altar.

He took his time, amassing followers. Drunk on power. He spoke—and countless voices answered with gratitude.

They offered themselves freely.

“Father, help me—I have lost the path.”

“I shall help you find it,” he replied, before reshaping them into creatures of the night.

But among the sea of souls, one figure stood apart.

You.

The girl newly arrived to the parish.

Sent to take your vows.

A novice.

A woman just beginning to kneel at the altar, offering your life to the Almighty.

Had he still breath in his body, it would have caught in his throat when he saw you kneel. It was visceral—the way you did it, as if your very soul depended on it.

His mouth watered at the sight of your bowed head, so deep in prayer.

He lost the thread of thought each time your voice reached him—those whispered fragments of breath, gasping with devotion.

And then you would rise, and your eyes would meet his. Eyes brimming with such innocence it could only be blasphemy.

A weak smile played on your lips, and though no sound escaped, your mouth would shape a single word: “Father.”

He would have to bite his own lip, stifling the sound that threatened to betray what stirred within him.

In those moments, all other prayers faded to ash. None of it satisfied him—because he had not yet claimed your devotion. There was something strange blooming in his chest.

He wanted to be the vessel of your prayers.

The reason you knelt.

The one to whom you begged for mercy

He nearly let the mask slip. That mask of the gentle shepherd promising redemption—he nearly let the wolf beneath show.

The first time it happened was after mass. The congregation stood, lining up for communion. And when his favored lamb stepped forward, he almost surrendered.

You looked up at him from beneath your lashes.

An innocent smile curved your lips.

Your mouth opened slowly; the tip of your tongue peeked out, waiting.

He forgot what he was meant to do—that he should place the host on your tongue and send you in peace.

Another thought crept in: that he could offer you his body in truth—that his could be granted real salvation.

He came back to himself as he reached out with the wafer. The wet heat of your mouth brushed against his fingers.

A broken sound escaped his throat.

And you—

You answered it with a gasping moan so soft, so trembling, it nearly made the sacred offering fall from your lips.

He had no need for the devotion of all those people. What he truly craved was the touch of that novice. The barest graze of your hand would have sufficed. He pictured those fingers—now clasped in sacred supplication—threading through his hair, gliding just above the skin of his shoulders. His knees quivered, and he feared he might fall to them and beg you for mercy, beg you to touch him.

It lasted only a moment—a fleeting breath for you, an eternity for him. You closed your lips and, just before taking your leave, offered him the first words you'd spoken since arriving:

"Father?"

He responded with a guttural hum, void of words.

"You're drooling."

He blinked several times, struggling to comprehend your meaning. When he failed to react, you stepped closer, raised a hesitant hand, and brushed the tip of your fingers along his chin, collecting the trail of saliva. He remained unmoved, lost in thought, lost in the warmth of your living skin against the pallor of his own. A strangled moan escaped him, and he fought the urge to beg you to take it away with your tongue. When you were done, you did not wipe your hand. You left him in silence.

His bones ached. His skin itched—desperate to be touched like that once more. He was fascinated by you, by everything about you. He could watch you for hours, kneeling in silent devotion before a god who never answered. But he would answer. He would reward every one of your prayers.

Something stirred in his dead chest when he thought: if you could give yourself so wholly to a god cruel and thankless, what might you offer a monster who spoke back? A flicker of hope burned within him. A glimmer of salvation. But he still did not know what it was he truly wanted from you—whether to corrupt you and make you his, or surrender to your innocence and your aching desire to save others.

He always chose the first.

The last time his mask slipped was in the confessional, listening to the woes of his flock. He found it dull—time dragged unbearably, which was saying much for a creature such as he.

He was about to leave the cramped chamber when he heard the wood creak beneath someone's weight. The cloying scent of incense that had surrounded him was swept away by something else—something that made his fists clench and his composure waver. Every sense lit up, overwhelmed by your presence. He could not help but wet his lips, seeking the taste of you in the heavy air of the confessional.

He needed to flee that space, now a prison thumping with the echo of your heartbeat. A slow rhythm, one that had lulled him to sleep through the stone walls that separated your quarters from his.

"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."

The sound of your voice struck him like a blow, and he grasped the wooden bench beneath him to stay upright. No words came—he was too dazed by your nearness.

You remained still. From the moment you entered that narrow chamber, the blood beneath your skin had begun to stir, crackling and restless. Just as it always did in the preacher’s presence. You felt like a moth, spellbound by the colour and scent of a newly bloomed flower. Suspended in a kind of limbo, you waited for his reply, uncertain whether you'd spoken your words rightly. You breathed deeply, unaware that each breath drew you ever closer to the Devil himself.

"Speak, child. What burdens your soul?"

Your tongue felt thick, clumsy. His voice had rendered you motionless. It had emerged rough, reverberating through the wooden walls as though he were everywhere—like the Almighty Himself.

"I have had doubts, Father."

He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from correcting you, from begging—no, pleading—for you to call him by name. For you to form the true syllables of his being with those lips, those lips that tempted him with every prayer they uttered to God. But he did not. He waited in silence for you to continue.

"Since I came to this congregation, troubling thoughts have come upon me."

You shifted, seeking to relieve your sore knees. The movement brought your thighs together, and an unfamiliar tension began to stir low in your belly. And all the while, you knew—knew with perfect certainty—that the very cause of your unrest was seated just on the other side of the wooden screen. You could see his silhouette leaning in, as if trying to draw nearer to you through the lattice.

The sound you let slip filled his ears. The sweet scent of your desire clouded his mind completely. He let it invade his hollow chest, and in that moment, he swore he could feel his dead heart beat again. He could almost swear he had glimpsed the face of God just by breathing you in.

He summoned your face in his mind and, for the first time in his existence, believed in the divine. If angels walked the earth, surely they would wear your countenance. He wanted to leave that chamber, to kiss you. No—that wasn’t enough. He wanted to drink you. To beg you to touch his body with those hands that had only ever known the flesh of the Lord. To run your lips across his skin—the same lips that had spoken a thousand prayers, now offered to him.

And then he would repay you. He would fall to his knees and press his mouth to every place where your pulse thundered, where your body cried out for pleasure, where—

"Father?"

He had collapsed to his knees within the confessional. The pressure in his trousers had become unbearable. He was utterly lost in the rapture of his own imaginings. You had kept speaking while he spiraled ever deeper into his thoughts.

"Forgive me, I was…" What would he say? That he had been dreaming of destroying a soul like yours? "…I was distracted."

"It’s alright. Please, don’t worry. It’s only natural to have one's thoughts elsewhere. It happens to me often."

There it was—that goodness in you that tore the words from his throat. That left him hollow, aching to be something better than what he was.

"Continue."

He just wanted to hear your voice. Any excuse would do. To listen to the way your heart sped or slowed with every emotion that crossed your face.

"Father, as I was saying… I have been troubled with doubt. I am told I must give my devotion entirely to the Lord. But… another man appears in my prayers. How can I vow eternal devotion, when my thoughts already belong to someone else?"

Desire gave way to jealousy—an emotion he had never known. Bile rose in his throat, and he had to swallow hard to push down the knot of fury rising there. He searched the memories of his converted faithful, those whose minds he now shared. Demanded an answer. But none had seen another man near you. Only images of you, watching him when he wasn’t looking. Only him.

"But it is not only my thoughts, Father. He appears in my dreams as well."

"What kind of dreams?"

He startled himself—he hadn't thought he had strength enough left to summon his voice.

"I’m ashamed to admit it."

Another sound, the whisper of movement. The wood creaked once more beneath your weight as you shifted, trying to ease a pressure that clung to you all day, dull and persistent.

"In those dreams… someone touches me. It’s that man. Not roughly, not in sin. It’s... gentle. Tender. As if I were the one being worshipped."

Silence fell—thick, suffocating. A silence you could slice through like meat.

"...And I like it. When I wake, I find myself wishing it were true."

He couldn’t speak. Not a single word. He tried to root himself to the floor, to keep from leaping upon you like a beast. Because what you were offering—what you had just confessed—was what he had longed for more than anything.

"How am I to give myself wholly to the Lord," you whispered, "if my soul and body no longer belong to Him?"

He opened his mouth, but another voice came out—not his own.

"And to whom do they belong, child?"

Again, that terrible stillness. Another shifting of cloth and knees on old wood. And then the words that shattered him.

"To you, Father."

There was no shame in your voice. Not a flicker of repentance. That’s when he understood: you hadn’t come seeking absolution. You had come to offer yourself.

Like a lamb stepping willingly into the wolf’s mouth—and rejoicing in the devouring.

A gasp rose to your lips but never left them as the confessional door burst open. He stood there, wild-eyed, breathless, as if trying to drink in your very presence. You were still on your knees, looking up at him.

You feared divine punishment. Retribution. But it never came. Instead, he fell to his knees before you.

The desperation in his eyes was raw. He looked up at you the way saints must look up at their holy relics, with terror and awe. He trembled—perhaps from restraint, perhaps from hunger.

"Please."

It was not a command but a plea. You didn't need to ask what he meant—you already knew. You raised a hand, and without hesitation, you buried it in his hair. That shadowed thing, that spiritless wretch, melted under your touch like frost beneath the sun. He crumbled in your palm, begging silently for more.

A sound escaped him—was it a sob? A groan? It broke something in you. You wanted to give more. With your other hand, you reached across his chest, still clothed. He never wore the cassock, and you preferred it that way—it let you see him better.

He leaned into you until his forehead rested against your shoulder, as though that contact alone kept him alive. His breath was a trembling wind in your ear, his chest heaving with a storm he dared not unleash.

He clung to you like a penitent to a relic, a damned soul clinging to the last scrap of mercy.

"Touch me," he whispered—and it was as though the stone walls of the chapel shuddered.

The word was a prayer. A surrender.

He, who had always held the final word. He, who had heard confessions and passed judgments.

Now he begged.

"Please..."

His voice broke under the weight of need. He raised his eyes to you—dark, shining with the sting of frustrated longing.

"I need your hands upon me. Do it. Let you be the one to bless me. With that touch. With that skin."

His fingers fumbled at the hem of his shirt, trembling, unsure. He could not bring himself to remove it—not without your permission. Because in that moment, you were his deity.

Your warmth bled through the linen between you, a slow-burning fire that consumed him from the inside out.

And then, you moved.

Your fingers slid up along his jaw, guiding his gaze to yours. At the touch, he let out a low, aching sound—half sob, half plea. Like a wounded creature unsure if comfort would come.

"Give me one reason to believe," he whispered. "Make me believe I still have a soul."

And you touched him—not with pity, but with dominion.

One by one, you undid the buttons of his shirt, revealing skin marked by sleepless nights and some long-forgotten struggle for virtue. He trembled with each new inch of flesh uncovered. His lips parted with the anticipation, the unbearable sweetness of it.

"Look at me, Father," you commanded, drawing out the title like a dare.

And he obeyed.

Because he was no longer priest, nor man, nor monster.

He was devoted. A thing made of longing, of need—kneeling before the only divinity that might still offer him salvation: you.

When your lips touched his bare chest, he released a sound caught between a sob and a laugh. As if, for the first time, he understood what it meant to believe.

You watch the way his lashes flutter, how his mouth parts as if readying a prayer or a moan.

Your fingers trace the line of his collarbone, slowly, deliberately. His skin is hot — fevered almost — as though your presence alone has set him alight. When your thumb brushes the hollow of his throat, his head falls back just slightly, exposing more of himself. Offering it. Offering everything.

You lean closer. Your lips barely graze his skin — a whisper of contact — and he gasps like it hurts. Or like it heals.

“You’re shaking,” you murmur.

“I’m trying,” he chokes out, “so hard not to fall apart.”

But he’s already unraveling for you. Each second is a thread undone. And you like watching him come undone.

You lower your mouth to his chest. He cries out — softly, beautifully — and fists his hands into the fabric of your habit like it’s the only thing anchoring him to this world. You can feel his need pressing against you, insistent and utterly helpless, but he doesn’t dare move. Doesn’t dare guide your hand.

He’s waiting. Needing. Yours.

You let your hand drift down. Slowly. Testing.

When your palm rests just above his waistband, he inhales sharply, his whole body tightening beneath you. His hips rise, involuntary, and his eyes flutter open in a haze of worship and hunger.

“Please,” he whispers, voice rough, almost broken. “I beg you. Don’t stop.”

And so you don’t.

You undo the button. You pull down the zipper. You feel him shudder — a deep, guttural sound that vibrates through both of you — and you push the fabric down just enough to free him.

The sight of him, hard and flushed and trembling, sends a rush of heat to your core. He is beautiful in his vulnerability. Glorious in his surrender.

You wrap your hand around him, and he whimpers.

No. He weeps.

Not from pain. Not from guilt. But from relief.

He presses his forehead to your shoulder, lips brushing your neck, and you feel the wetness there — hot, desperate tears as he mutters thank-yous and praises under his breath, not to any god, but to you.

Only you.

Because in this moment, you are not a nun. You are a miracle.

And he is your worshipper.

You feel him twitch in your hand, a pulse like thunder just under your palm. His hips strain forward, breath catching again and again against your neck. His lips linger too long there now — not in reverence.

In hunger.

You sense the shift instantly. The way his tongue flicks the hollow behind your ear, how his breath suddenly comes cooler, shivering over your skin like a prelude. It’s no longer just need — it’s instinct. Ancient. Ravenous.

Then you feel them: the tips of his fangs grazing your skin. It’s subtle, gentle. A test. A question.

But you answer it before it becomes a plea.

“No.”

Your voice is firm. You don’t raise it, but the word cuts through him like a lash. He pulls back with a strangled groan, his whole body wracked with restraint.

“I—” he tries, his voice hoarse, desperate, full of shame. “I didn’t mean to, I just—”

You hush him with your touch. You never stop moving your hand. If anything, you tighten just slightly. He gasps, eyes rolling back, head falling against your chest again.

His hands are gripping your thighs now, not to take, but to anchor himself — shaking like he might fall apart if you let go. He’s trying so hard to hold back. But he wants. You can feel it rising in him — this deep, writhing hunger not just for your body but your blood.

And you make him wait. Let him ache. Let him tremble.

He moans something — unintelligible, fervent — and just as his climax builds, as his breath shortens and his whole being coils beneath your touch like a creature about to break — you raise your free hand to your mouth.

Your teeth sink into your own wrist. The pain is sharp, but clean. Righteous.

A thin line of blood blossoms instantly, warm and deep red, and his eyes snap to it like a beast scenting prey.

He stares at it. Then at you.

A heartbeat. Two.

And then you press your wrist to his mouth.

He freezes — utterly still — even as your other hand continues to work him toward release.

He’s panting, eyes flicking between your face and your bleeding wrist. You feel his lips twitch against your skin, and you whisper:

“Now.”

He opens his mouth — wide, reverent — and draws you in. The first pull is soft. Careful. Almost prayerful.

Then the second comes, deeper, more desperate, and you feel him groan against your skin. Feel the growl ripple through his chest as your blood hits his tongue. His hips jerk forward and he spills into your hand with a cry torn between rapture and agony.

He drinks like a starving man.

Your blood slides down his throat, and you watch his body convulse under the weight of it — of you. He clutches you as though you’re the last holy thing left in this godless world. You feel the thank-you he can’t speak thrumming through his veins. You gave him everything — not just your touch, but your life, your essence.

And he gives himself to you.