honk honk

vampire with the ability to put humans in thrall but they use it solely to make viral asmr videos

you are feeling sleepy. you are feeling sooooooo relaxed. you are going to like and subscribe for more content

damn your pussy fat and long and hard and outside

I habe some bad news

BOTH TOWERS?

get in loser we’re gonna try again despite it all

He needs mouse bites to live

lately my kids have been playing Baby Knife, which consists of somebody acting as a baby with knife hands chasing people while going "baby knife baby knife" over and over. is this a thing or are they just insane

we have a new teacher this year who has never had kindergarten before & she rounded em all up & told em No Baby Knife and No Zombies and idk how to tell her that 1. all kindergarten recess games boil down to Give Birth And Kill Each Other and 2. the absurd vaguely inappropriate games they make up are usually better than when they try to play an Actual game like soccer

Baby Knife is straightforward. theres a baby knife. baby knife chases you. thats about it. when they try to play Real Sports every single child is playing by a different set of rules unbeknownst to the others and none of them are playing by the Actual rules. everybody is mad at everybody else and running up to tell on their colleagues for cheating every 3 minutes. this doesnt happen when they play Baby Knife

We were incredibly boring. We played "murder ball" which was just Capture the Flag over the whole school grounds (outdoors only) and violence was permitted using the ball.

we had British Bulldogs which was where one line of kids had to get past another line of kids (and vice versa) and violence was expected, much like we imagine dodgeball to be

Ah yes, we called that Red Rover and actually played it in gym class

I was debating pre- and post- smartphone existentialism with an older gentleman today and he stopped part way through and said “Why are you a security guard? Why aren’t you teaching this at some college somewhere?” And I didn’t know what to say so I went with “Well I used to make art but nobody pays an artist”

I want to invoke thought and wonder and introspection and encourage the passions of every soul I meet forever and ever and dig until I find the glorious potential for creation and experience and joy in every single one but unfortunately I must pay rent and so I stand, a meat shield, an NPC with unlockable dialogue

#capitalism brain tells you that anyone interesting must fight to the top of their interest#and precludes the possibility of everyone everyone everyone already being interesting

the way ozempic has finally made the fact that eating healthy and exercising doesn't necessarily make you thin well known and society's reaction to this is not "oh i guess being thin or fat doesn't actually show if you're healthy" but "oh i guess everyone should be on this drug"

I hate that this is infact how ozempic is viewed now because I watched, in real time, how my mothers diabetes got significantly better on ozempic, she didn't start it for weight loss, infact she started it before it even got big for weight loss, but all people can talk about is the weight loss on ozempic and not how good it is as a diabetes medication. Watching my mom find energy and happiness because for once a drug wasn't making her lethargic and miserable was wonderful, she was able to feel better, but then it was spouted as this miracle weight loss drug, and suddenly she just couldn't access it anymore at a good price. Not only has the ozempidemic made fatphobia normal in an already fatphobic society but it's making it harder to access for people who genuinely need it because it's seen as a luxury cosmetic drug.

my A1C (long-term blood sugar test) tends to waver up and down between just barely below the pre-diabetic range to up into the low end of the diabetic range, and due to a long family history there's a good chance of it progressing to diabetes if it isn't kept under control. Ozempic, or another glp1, would actually be really helpful for leveling out my blood sugar and keeping me from progressing towards actual diabetes. However, because so many people have been trying to get on it, the state insurance i have has tightened the requirements for coverage, and now you need two back-to-back tests in the full diabetic range to get on the drug, and because my blood sugar fluctuates so much in the long term my tests aren't consistent enough for me to qualify despite the fact that it would be genuinely very helpful for keeping me from developing diabetes. i'm so fucking sick of it being a fucking cosmetic drug i swear to god.