something something trigun

Everyone say thank you sanitation workers we owe you our lives sanitation workers

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

Any educator who doesn't feel this on a visceral level has never had to experience the psychic pain of reading the phrase "Unused York City."

I'm trying to hide my plagiarism but the clapping of my sinister buttocks keeps alerting the lecturer

do not, my friends, become addicted to touching. it will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence.

it will take hold of me?🥺👉👈

'he would not fucking say that' maybe he would if he knew he was starring in his very own porn fic for the sole purpose of delighting some freaks on archive of our own dot org. maybe he'd play it up for the cameras. ever consider that

Not enough people talking about how well broccoli holds a sauce

I’m soooooo embarrassed. My lord told me “good night,” but I thought he was calling me a good knight, and, well, you could hear it clink against my codpiece.

ultimately the truth about frankenstein is that we are all grotesque amalgamations of the best and worst parts of everyone who came before us. and sometimes the people who are supposed to love us because of and in spite of this will not. and we can kill them with hammers for that. and i think that’s beautiful

well i can’t argue with that one

Ah yes, Mary Shelley’s monster.

no mary shelley is the name of the monster not the doctor

common misconception! mary shelley's monster was actually lord byron