💭☕️

And when I die, please bury me in my warmest sweater, with my hair brushed neat and my favorite watch. I have a long-awaited walk to take, and so much to tell my dad.

But when you lose someone, you don't lose them all at once, and their dying doesn't stop with their death. You lose them a thousand times in a thousand ways. You say a thousand goodbyes. You hold a thousand funerals.

google search:

What is your worst fear?

Grief is an amputation, but hope is incurable hemophilia: you bleed and bleed and bleed.

I knew that it was cruel to be so optimistic, but, in my solitude, I couldn't resist the urge and spent entire days basking in idiotic fantasies, sometimes verging on prayer.

do you ever feel like you're just sort of

Dear reader,

you're a mess of good intentions gone wrong. you strike a match on yourself to keep others warm, and now the whole goddamn world's on fire. you try to put it out, and you try so hard. the dam breaks, and the waters of your sorrow pour free. you are sorry; so very, very sorry- and you will drown everyone to prove it.

In another universe, I fight. I fight tooth and nail for what I want, claw my way into opportunities until my fingertips bleed, argue until my tongue is numb, scream until my voice no longer sounds my own.

they never tell you how brutal the shift is—from classrooms with assigned seats and familiar faces, to crowded lecture halls where no one knows your name. college isn't just a new chapter, it's this sort of chasm, something so infinitely huge. suddenly, you're surrounded by people but lonelier than ever, learning how to pretend you're okay when you're not. and the hardest part isn’t even being alone but rather realizing that you don’t even feel like you anymore. because once you've lost the version of yourself that used to feel real, it takes everything in you to rebuild that person. and some days, it’s hard to even want to.

“I wish there were a way to know when the last time is the last time—while it’s still happening. The last time you step through the door of your childhood home, the last time you kiss someone you love, the last time you ever see them. Because if I had known, I would’ve made sure it wasn’t the last. Or at the very least, I would’ve stayed in that moment just a little longer.”

تخيّلتك دواي وصرت جرحي الصعب يا خلي

لا شيء أقسي على الروح من رائحة الاحلام و هي تتبخر

just a casual reminder that—

i don’t get how people can hate the rain? like…. the ocean came all this way to give the world tiny kisses and you treat her like this?!