Fat-nasty sack of trash

why do we bother with I hate my partner jokes when your boss is right there

I love my wife. my boss though? that ball and chain??

Bestie, your brain, your VISION, ahead of your time

giving the kubrick stare to the fish at petco

Petition to rename “Americans” to burger idiots

K, Burger Idot.

I’m crying but this is what I wanted

I love a game with a meter. Don't care what it does, just love seeing that thing fill up and get shiny. Hate when the meter decreases. Prefer when it fills up.

what in the screaming blue christ

I interpreted this as the guy having ADHD cause we never pay attention even to people with megaphones

plot twist: they both have adhd. one has the predominantly hyperactive-impulsive type, the other the predominantly inattentive type

She’s info-dumping and he’s writing an essay in his head that he’ll never commit to paper.

This is what college is like

I am simultaneously both of these people.

I need the namr of the song asap fam

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU NEED THE NAME