“Why won’t you tell me about your parents?” “Why can’t I know your real name?” “Where do you work?”
1.) Not all our parents would bake us a fucking cake when we come out. Some of us are closeted. Surely you understand this? You also do not need to know my parent’s names or occupations; we are both adults. I do not need nor want to mix you and my private life with my parents and my public life.
2.) Trans people do not owe you their dead name or government name
3.) I’m not telling you for the sake of job security. I am a government fucking caseworker working amidst a fucking lavender panic!
“There’s no way you’re a different person outside this; you’re still you at your core. What harm is there—”
No, I am a completely different person. A different person with a different personality and different interests and a different name and presentation. I am a completely different person because I keep this life and my public life private to avoid fracturing 90% of my interpersonal relationships and 100% of my professional ones.
“You’re not out? But you’re so confident.”
See— that’s part of the issue. Y’all assume someone is in the closet because they hate themselves or lack self-identity. Some of us know exactly who we are, but need to prioritize financial stability or else our entire life gets exponentially harder immediately.
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