[I.D.: pixel art of Coco from Witch Hat Atelier. she is in her normal witch outfit: a blue cloak over a white dress and a blue pointy hat with a tassel. /end I.D.]
Coco my beloved!!! she's such a cutie <3
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@the-potato-beeper
[I.D.: pixel art of Coco from Witch Hat Atelier. she is in her normal witch outfit: a blue cloak over a white dress and a blue pointy hat with a tassel. /end I.D.]
Coco my beloved!!! she's such a cutie <3

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My pronouns are we/us because we’re in this together. Hold my hand
now draw her with a vacant stare. and it/its pronouns
did u know u could just draw bad and nothing happens did u know that
girlies are u doing ok
oh no girlies
[Id: tumblr tag: bursts into tears. /end id.]
sometimes i be saying im gonna go to bed and then i dont go to bed. frequently in fact. this is because i have the heart of an optimist and the soul of a liar

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I think when you correctly identify a trauma that is the base of a woe of yours it should just disappear. It should be like "aaahh. you got me" and vanish and leave 100 dollars behind
#if you line up several neuroses and identify the interlocking connections between them they should all vanish like clearing a line in tetris (via @karliahs)
in monster high universe you can get horrormone replacement therapy. there's hextrogen and testostegroan
Y'all hear about this nuance stuff
I've heard mixed things.
Oh so it sucks then, and you hate it
Hey so that was a great date, yeah, but I don't think it's going to work out. Nono you didn't do anything wrong, and I have indeed had a crush on you since we started high school, it's just... well, I didn't want to bring it up at the time but we kinda got sucked into a portal fantasy midway through. We saved the kingdom over and over, relying on our knowledge of and trust in each other every time, throwing ourselves into the firing line to protect each other and using each others' conviction as a rock. We got married and lived a happy life together until the portal sucked us back mid-battle and you gave up all your memories of our journey in order to save my life right when we ended up back in the coffee shop. Yeah that was when I got a bit weird and went to the bathroom.
Anyway I thought we could push on and make the date work but I have all of these memories of secrets that this you never chose to share, decisions that this you never made, and intimacies that this you never experienced. And it's kind of screwing with the vibe yeah. Also on the date it was really, blatantly clear that you're sixteen whereas I have memories of ruling a fantasy kingdom for thirty years so like... that's a problem all on its own. Anyway this you just feels more like a daughter to me. A daughter with the woman I gave my heart and soul to over and over and received like in return, only to lose her forever on the journey home. On the plus side I can definitely help you with your math homework now.
#what the fuck#this one was actually really very short why is it still like that what
The shorter it is, the more concentrated the what the fuck can be.
I can help you with your math homework because the fantasy world's magic system was based on calculus and I was a gifted mage, stop nitpicking.
#this world's magic system is also based in calculus
don't go into the humanities because they're unprofitable and don't go into stem cuz its getting torn apart right now and don't go into buisness because it's competetive and speculative and don't go into education because it pays like shit. Just lay on thr ground. Just lay on the ground.

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got a bunch of new games! so far i have tried 2: Celeste and A Dance of Fire and Ice. Celeste seems like it could be fun, but holy shit do i need to remap the keys. to what, i'm not sure, but as is it is killing me. once i get that figured out, it seems like a fun challenge—i'm excited to keep playing, overall!
and A Dance of Fire and Ice is SUCH a fun rhythm game!! some of the moves are notttt clicking, but that's just an issue of practicing more, i think. can't wait to try Rhythm Doctor and Nine Sols tomorrow! and hopefully the other co-op ones with my friends soon :D can't wait to try Unrailed 2 in particular with everyone, but all of the ones we got look super fun!
they're saying spending 2 hours in the word doc changing words slightly to be more specific and evocative and moving endless commas around is one of the most noble and respected things that you can do
lark was, as usual, much more eloquent in his writeup of it, but every so often I think about how he really wanted to learn the cello and I really did not. so we rented a cello, signed up for lessons, and every day he would drag himself to front in order to practice, even if it was only for ten minutes a day, because cello is something you really need to do every day if possible or you Will feel the backsliding. some days he wouldn't be able to make it and I'd play some scales as a favor to him, but we tried to minimize those days because those practice sessions would inevitably be full of me bitching about how boring and tedious learning a musical instrument is, much like how every time I play minecraft I bitch about how boring and tedious placing blocks is.
and after years of experimenting with fronting rooms and self-hypnosis and all sorts of other jedi mind tricks in hopes of Switching Better, that was the thing that actually made a difference for us - showing up On Purpose, Every Day, because he really wanted this thing that no one else was going to do. obviously every system is different and there are all sorts of other sneaky barriers (trust, safety, adhd, figuring out who you are enough to even know you want something bad enough to switch regularly for it) but for us? after figuring out those barriers, there was really only one thing left we could do, and that was Deliberate Practice. it's almost maddening in its simplicity, the same way I look at paul arendt's art progress (guy who has been doing art for fallen london for 15 years) and go "damn, the only way to get good at art is to actually do it, huh. F u c k."
I try to rein it in because there's a genuine issue in the plural community where we put our headmates on pedestals (we're all just people at the end of the day! equally prone to flaw and failure) but I genuinely consider Lark to be more powerful than I am, for one fundamental reason: he's tolerant of slow, incremental progress. he said "I want to learn the cello" and proceeded to learn the cello via 10-30 minutes of methodical, painstaking practice, every day. he said "I want to understand Minecraft" and proceeded to build dozens of houses, redstone contraptions, and farms, one block at a time, after watching one guide at a time. even chores, finances, and meditation: he does them one task at a time, one ledger entry at a time, one breath at a time, one moment at a time. he does all of this while dealing with the same system-wide mental and physical limitations - adhd, fatigue, sleep bullshit - with no promise that he'll ever attain a certain level of mastery, and he gets really far despite it all because he just keeps showing up.
so now when I find myself wanting to learn something, but getting frustrated because it isn't happening Right Away, I grit my teeth and go "Lark would do this One Step At A Time. I am going to take a leaf out of his book and try. to do this. One. Step. At A Time." this was how I finally managed to learn how to play Limbo in Warframe after bouncing off of him multiple times - I went "okay, Lark would just take this one mission at a time. I am going to play this robotwink one mission at a time until he clicks, even if it feels like pulling out all of my teeth, dammit." this was how I learned to sew - "I am going to do this one project at a time, one step at a time, one stitch at a time, like Lark would, and not think about how I'm going to ruin everything forever if I don't immediately get it right oh my god." maybe if I'm lucky this will be how I overcome gifted kid syndrome, by crying about how hard things are One Hard Thing At A Time
a continuation in the saga of Doing Hard Things:
the two of us were chatting with some friends about confidence - specifically, how to cultivate it. there were a lot of good takeaways from that convo, including:
confidence is like a muscle. it's something you grow, with little efforts over time, and then also have to sustain with little efforts over time - but also the more you've grown it, the easier it is to make those little efforts
lack of confidence is, often, trying to protect what you already have; confidence, meanwhile, tries to obtain more nice things (where the "nice things" are not necessarily material)
confidence is built not just from trying stuff and succeeding at it, but from failing and realizing the failure was not as catastrophic as feared, and even from going through the process of making decisions at all
from this conversation I stumbled upon a hack for my specific psyche that makes me kind of mad at how simple it is. instead of telling myself "I want to practice [thing]," which inevitably triggers as cascade of "but what if I FUCK IT UP FOREVER," I've been approaching stuff from the angle of "I want to practice being the kind of person who does [thing]." I'm not practicing sewing - I'm practicing being the kind of person who sews! I'm not practicing job applications - I'm practicing being the kind of person who applies to jobs! I'm not practicing doing things, I'm practicing making decisions to do things!
doing things A Little At A Time was a helpful framework, but it was also very much teeth-gritting for me, specifically. this new one keeps being even more helpful and non-terrible and, again, I am kind of mad-but-not-really-but-also-kinda that adding an arbitrary extra layer of abstraction helps me, specifically, this much. I have no idea how long it will continue working, but in the meantime it's gotten me to apply for An Job where I would have previously agonized over whether it was a good idea to apply, so. we take our wins
"Employment" big scam. Big scam to distract You from what matters,posting on Ur tumblr blog at 3am
two things doctors know:
leave patient alone in a room for 6 hours
incorrectly file paperwork

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if you love someone enough you should be able to hug them really tight and pop into the same body as them and never have to leave like its aristophanes's myth of the spherical human
post cancelled i just reinvented steven universe
Peeling off the broken breastplate of a stoic knight who only fights and never speaks, just to realize there’s nothing in there. Not metaphorically—the armor is literally empty. It doesn’t appear to affect him. If the armor stays mostly in the shape of a knight, he just gets back up to keep fighting. But with the chest plate off he just sits there, equally impervious to curiosity as I reach up into the cavity where his body might’ve gone. Stubbornly, no answers are found anywhere in there.
So I forge him a new breastplate and on the inside, because I know he has plenty of room, I put a little pocket. Not big enough to hold anything functional of course. Just a little extra piece to see what he’ll do with it.