Heres some stuff and more...

Anyway my friend had some not so nice teeth and during dinner the father of his fwb was like “you work where you work, you sleep with him and his teeth look like that? Get him an appointment.”and then bounced. So his fwb made him an appointment at the practice she managed and my friend ended up needing like 3k worth of dental work and his friend with benefits just gave it to him for free.

Imagine that today you are in a place between Canada and Russia, and suddenly, for 30 seconds, the moon in its maximum splendor appears and disappears before you. In addition, for 5 seconds, it gives rise to a total solar eclipse. Something unheard of, right.

In perigee, the proximity to the Moon shows the great speed at which we move without feeling it.

It is recorded in real time.

MEAN GIRLS (2004) JENNIFER’S BODY (2009)

+ bonus

Yes this is marble.

Yes these are marble.

Hey did you guess, this is marble.

This is just a giant dong (made from marble). Titled, ‘souvenir David’. 😁

More info and image sources here :

I also say “thanks for the update” or “thanks for the head’s up!”

“I really appreciate the head’s up!” also a classic

If I haven’t gotten back to someone in a swift enough period (i.e. one work day max) I say “thank you for your patience. after some consideration, I have decided…”

don’t apologize for piddly things! 

Thank you for waiting for me > sorry for being late

Thank you for helping me/for your time/for listening to me > sorry for bothering you

Thanking someone when they do you a favour > apologizing for your existence

And the thing is, when he came back to his studio, he’s not allowed to have crowds there either because of New York’s restrictions.

But without fail, every other joke, you can hear this one, single woman laughing in the background.

That’s his wife.

Covid restrictions don’t apply to his spouse, and everyone else in the studio has a job, and has to work, so she’s become the only person in the room left laughing at his jokes.

She doesn’t laugh every time. You can tell she’s not doing it on cue, because there are some bits she clearly likes better than others. Some bits where she is laughing her ass off, and some where she just chuckles.

But my god, every time she laughs, Colbert’s face lights up like the sun.

Like, even if every other person on earth was dead and gone, if he was on his deathbed and breathing his last breath, he’d still make a jokes, just to make her laugh again.